Lord give me strength

Jaxon stuff bc

I don't know anymore

Jaxon: [forgets the word for lid]

Jaxon: [walks up to Utah with a pan]

Jaxon: Where's his hat



Kingsley, to the groupchat at 3 am: Honque

Jaxon: French geese be like:

Utah: Why did your school call me?

Jaxon: [mumbles]

Utah: I can't hear you

Jaxon: I poured water on a kids test because he kept looking over at mine and writing down my answers

California: Why is Jaxon at the meeting?

Utah: He got kicked out of class

California: Why?

Jaxon: I said the government was a bunch of dickheads and called anyone that tried to defend the government a dickhead in training and the teacher called my dad

California: Well you're right

Utah: Don't encourage this

Florida: Why was he kicked out this time?

Utah: He kept cursing while the teacher was talking about censorship

Utah: What did you say when they asked you to stop?

Jaxon:

Jaxon: "What, are you going to censor me?" 

Jaxon: Wait

Jaxon: Awesome is from like

Jaxon: Filled with awe

Jaxon: So that means handsome is

Kingsley: Please go back to bed

Jaxon: Fuck!

Illithyia: Language

Jaxon: Fuck is actually of Germanic origin, related to Dutch, German, and Swedish words for "to strike" and "to move back and forth."

Jaxon: But the first time it's ever shown up was the 16th century-

Illithyia: Go to your room.

Jaxon: Carpe diem is "seize the day"

Jaxon: carpe noctem is "seize the night"

Jaxon: and carpe collum is "seize the neck"

Jaxon: so if you don't shut up-

And some headcanons to end it

Jaxon wears glasses

He is a little shit and a chaos gremlin but instead of being physically destructive he'll just keep talking and bringing random facts up until someone is either freaked out or he wins whatever argument he's in

He curses in other languages he knows (only at home) so Utah/Illithyia stop telling him not to curse 

He has social anxiety and agoraphobia 

He uses weird insults like "I'm gonna harvest your toes" or "may both sides of your pillow be warm"