The Boy Next Door.

Chapter 83

Please read the authors note at the end of this chapter. Enjoy...

Sammie-Jo’s Pov.

Heartbreak, hurt, sad, betrayed, useless, lonely is the only way to describe my feelings right now. Since arriving back from the police station, I’ve been sat here on the living room floor of Damien's house crying. Okay I know that I should have gone straight to Mia’s and Harry’s but I couldn’t. I needed to come back here just for one last time. Why? I don’t know just to know that I’m now free in a house that I was scared to be in.

I’m now free. Free to breathe. Free to talk to anyone. Free to be myself.

I should be cherishing this moment but I can’t because I feel guilty. I Shouldn’t but I do. I know that I’m stupid but as much as I hate Damien, I also love him. I promised to keep him safe as long as he kept me safe even though he always broke his promises. I hate him I really do even though my feelings are still strong for him. I definitely wouldn’t take him back ever but I don’t really have a choice anyway because he is in jail.

I knew how dangerous and serious Damien could be but I never thought that he had it in him to hold someone at gun point. Yes I’ve saw him do it in the past but the gun was empty and he only did it to make a threat but the other night…well that was real. It was a loaded gun, anything could have gone wrong at any point. I could have died, Harry could have died and most importantly Mia and their baby could have died. With one false move, we all could have gone. It may have been a small gun but it was powerful!

When the bullet shot out, I thought that was it. That was the end. It wasn’t though, Mia jumped in front of me. What was she thinking? That’s it she wasn’t thinking. None of us were, especially not Damien. He is twisted and mental.

Uch he makes my skin crawl. The more and more I sit here and think of him, I begin to resent him with every second that passes. I know that I should hate him anyway but it’s hard.

I wish that I would have never have gone back to him time after time. I shouldn’t have listened to him saying that he loved me. I shouldn’t have trusted him again when he promised that he wouldn’t hurt me again. I shouldn’t have done a lot of things.

The only thing that I should have done is run. Run so far away that he couldn’t find me, couldn’t hurt me, and couldn’t make promises he couldn’t keep, couldn’t lie to me. I hate him!

Will I ever be able to trust anyone ever again? Will I ever be able to get back on my feet and gain my family back? The family who was there for me but I pushed them away for the devil.

He never loved me. He never wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. He probably didn’t even want me. All he wanted me for was slavery. All he wanted me for was sex. All he saw me for was a sex slave, but I let him. I shouldn’t have but I did. He could sometimes be cute with me but now I realise that was only because he would want sex after. I’m useless and worthless.

Staring at my reflection in the mirror right now, all is see is a wreck. Not the soft, smooth, shiny skin and the smile I used to see. No. Just a pale, rough mess. I don’t like it. I hate myself.

Picking up the nearest vase on the table, I lob it so hard at the mirror. I through it because when I look at my reflection all I see it him staring back at me.

The shatter to the glass describes how I feel inside. Physically shattered, mentally shattered and hurtfully shattered. There are so many pieces of me that is broken, they may never be able to be put back together to complete the jigsaw.

Maybe I should run now? Nobody knowing who I am. Nobody knowing my past. I’m not saying that my past is bad but people judge me for being with Damien.