Hope for the best, expect the worst.

Fallout?

Josh POV

It's been a week since Rebecca and I broke up. I haven't seen her but matts been keeping me updated. He doesn't sugar coat it; shes a mess.

Right now we're about to leave for this little tour we have these next two weeks. It's just a few small shows around BC in places that are too far out to get a good live show. Like Smithers, Dawson's creek and kamloops. Our first stop is Dawson's creek. Which is about a three day drive.

Right now we're passing whislaa. Rebecca hasn't said more than 5 words to me. I took a guess and figured she doesn't want me calling her porcelain if we aren't dating.

I was sitting in my bunk with my headphones on. It was about 2 am. I thought I heard a loud bang so I took my headphones off. Then I heard it again. Thunder.

I crept out of my bunk, sitting on the edge, listening to see if Rebecca was ok. A few seconds later she came out of her own bunk.

She stared at me with sad eyes and i opened my arms. She didn't need much coaxing to her to hug me. After she pulled away I grabbed her hand and pulled her into the back lounge, closing the door behind us. I sat down on the couch and leant my head back.

Rebecca came and sat on the couch beside me, I looked over at her, "I'm so sorry, Rebecca."

"Don't call me that. It doesn't sound right. Call me porcelain or disaster or something. My name from your mouth just sounds wrong." She looked at me, I nodded, "and I'm sorry too."

"Can't we go back?" I asked. "I mean. Forget about this and just go back the way we were?"

She smiled, "that was a line for a song I wrote, 'can't we go back for a minute, or even for a day, back to when you would hold me, tell me everything will be ok.'" she sighed, "josh. I'd love to. But we need to figure this out."

"Figure what out? cause I haven't been sleeping since you left. Not one wink. I fall asleep in the couch for an hour from overtiredness and get no more. Porcelain, I need you." I said pleadingly.

She had tears in her eyes, she wasn't letting them fall, "josh. I love you. You know I do. But I need to think, see if you can actually trust me. Cause without trust our relationship is nothing."

I nodded, "if it helps any. I didn't think for one second that you kissed Riker. I could tell you were trying to push him off. I was just mad that he had the balls to do that after only a week and it took me two months."

Then I got up and went back to my bunk. I put my headphones back on.

How am I gonna get her back?

Rebecca POV

I thought he thought I kissed Riker back. He did trust me. What have I done? I can't just run back to him now, but I need him back.

In all honesty I haven't been sleeping since I left him either. I need his arms around me or I don't feel safe.

Our break up is futile. If we don't get back together one of us could die just from exhaustion.

Then I heard another bang. I can't do this.

I got up and went to Josh's bunk, opening the curtain slightly. His eyes were closed and his headphones were on. I poked his shoulder lightly.

He opened his eyes and I looked at him pleadingly as another crash echoes thru the bus. He took off his headphones and made room for me.

I smiled thankfully and laid my head on his chest while he played with my hair, "this means nothing." I said firmly.

He smiled, I could tell by his voice, "this means I might actually get some sleep tonight."

I know the feeling. I closed my eyes and let sleep take over.

How am I gonna get him back?