Forbidden ~ Luke Hemmings FanFiction

Chapter 48 & 49

(I suggest listening to Miserable at Best by Mayday Parade when you see this *)

I find my way through the darkness of my neighbourhood; as I reach my door I take a deep breath and turn the door knob.

I sigh in relief when I don't see my mother; I close the door quietly and creep upstairs to the bathroom.

I slowly get undressed and turn on the water.

I was hoping a shower would tame the pain in my chest and the ache in my head; but it only makes things worse.

I turn off the water and sit down on the floor of the tub; I begin to ball my eyes out.

"Why am I so fucking stupid?" I growl while hitting my head.

I sit balling for several moments; my eyes meet my razor, I shake my head trying to remove the thoughts from my mind; but I can't.

I reach over and grab the razor; I brush it lightly over my arm; not making an incision.

"Why am I doing this?" I cry to myself; I push the razor down on my skin and drag it across my wrist. Blood immediately is drawn and my tears come to a complete stop.

I repeat this all the way up my arm to the crease of my elbow. I drop the razor and turn the tap on; I splash the water on my arm, it burns.

I turn off the tap and get out of the tub; I wrap my towel around my weak body and walk to my room.

"Shit." I whisper as I remember I have a test tomorrow; I've never been this unorganised, ever since Luke I've been putting him before everything.

I dry off and put on an oversized old baseball shirt. Blake used to play; so I stole that from him before I left as well.

I spread out my books on my bed and begin to study at nearly 10 o'clock.

My phone begins to ring out of nowhere.

"Who the hell is calling me at 12 am?" I mumble while reaching to my bedside table.

"Blake, what's wrong?" I ask immediately; Blake laughs on the other line.

"What I can't call you without something being wrong?" I can see his breathtaking smile in my mind.

"No, I just forgot not everyone is having as shitty of a day as I am." I fake laugh; closing my text books.

"Abbey, Abbey, Abbey what's happened now?" Blake sighs; I shake my head even though I know he can't see me.

"Nothing of importance I just have a science test tomorrow that I've barley studied for." I hear Blake gasp from the other line.

"Abbey, what is Australia doing to you?" Blake laughs; I can't help but smile when I hear his laugh, no matter how upset I am he always make me smile.

"Australia and a certain someone." I mumble before I can stop myself; my arm begins to throb, I walk over to me dresser and spray some Polysporn on it.

"Does this certain someone go by the name Luke?" He asks as I sit back down on my bed; hearing his name makes me want to break down in tears.

"Mhm." I mumble trying to hold back my emotions.

"I don't know if I like him too much Abbey." Blake mumbles; I feel my stomach turn.

"I-I gotta go Blake; it's late." I yawn into the phone; I would stay and talk to Blake forever about anything but I can't bear to talk about Luke anymore.

"Okay babe; call me when you can, I miss you." I understand Blake's pain because I feel it too; I miss him so much more every day.

"I miss you too Blakey; I'll try my hardest to call you tomorrow." I smile; I can feel his smile threw the phone.