THE COUPLE WHO DON'T SLEEP
I got my sweater and wore my jogging pants, dahil alam kong sa mga oras na ito ay malamig na ang hangin.
I looked at the clock, it's almost 1:00 am.
I smiled. Our usual spot and meeting place, rooftop. We meet there exactly 1:00 am in the midnight.
Dumaan muna ako sa convenience store, I have plans for today with him.
I buy our midnight snack and can beer.
Nang makarating ako ay hinintay ko siya at umupo muna sa sahig.
Then I looked at my wrist watch. Exactly 1:00 am.
I looked up.
"Hi."
"Jinn! You came!" I happily said then I hugged him.
"Ofcourse, lagi natin 'tong ginagawa." He smiled.
He's wearing white shirt and faded jeans now.
"Tara! Kain muna tayo midnight snack!" He nodded.
Nakalatag na rin yung blanket na may mga pagkain.
We started eating while talking.
"So wala ka ulit tulog?" I asked.
He nod. "Yeah, you too right?"
"As always, but I am happy being with you tho." Not having a sleep means seeing him beside me... then I'll remain myself awake.
"You bought can beers?" natatawang aniya.
"Why not? Masarap uminom niyan tuwing madaling araw." We both laughed.
"You trust me that enough drinking liquor with me? I'm still a guy, and you are a girl." My left brow rose.
"I trust you of course! You are my boyfriend after all."
"Even though we only meet every midnight?"
I sighed and looked directly at his eyes. "Yes."
Pagkatapos no'n ay naglaro lang kami ng pang two games, nag truth or dare, bato-bato pick then kung sino talo may pitik... pero pag dating sa akin hinihinaan niya lang yung pitik, ang daya! Dapat fair.
"Ano ba 'yan, naglaro pa tayo kung mahina parusa mo sa akin?!" nakakunot kong sabi.
"Edi ito na lang parusa ko sayo..." Then I felt his lips touch mine. It was just a smack but my heart launched off, crashing in my chest violently. I could almost hear it in my ears. It pound so fast as already it is.
Napatulala ako pagkatapos niya akong halikan, but he just giggled and laughed then he softly messed my hair.
"Silly."
Nahimasmasan ako at nabalik sa ulirat. I pouted my lips.
"You should've inform me!"
He smile shyly. "I didn't expect it too, I just... when I looked at your lips, it hypnotized me to kiss you."
Napailing na lang ako at tinago ang ngiti ko.
Kasalukuyan na kaming nakahiga sa blanket at pinakatitigan ang madilim na langit na napupuno ng maraming stars.
I sighed heavily. "Sana hindi na 'to matapos."
"Do you really want this?" he asked that's why I shifted my eyes on him.
"What want this? I want to be with you, okay." Pagtatapos ko sa usapan.
"Hindi ka ba napapagod sa set up natin?" Napatitig muli ako sa kalangitan at hindi na napigilan ang luha sa aking mga mata.
"Bakit naman ako mapapagod?" halos bulong ko.
"Because I am hesitating on our set up now, Jiya. And it means, you are hesitating too."
"No. I'm not," tanggi ko.
"You are."
"I said I'm not! Gaano ba kahirap intindihin 'yon Jinn?" Ngayon ay pareho na kaming naupo sa hinihigaan namin.
"You are hesitating now," he stated.
I bit my lower lip. Tears streaked down my face.
"You are totally awake... but not awake by the reality," he continued.
Umiling-iling ako.
"But I am happy with you!" I half shouted.
"Happy by what? Happy by the thought of me? Happy by day dreaming of me?!"
And his words slapped me.
"We both know Jiya that this is not really happening. It just your imagination and your day dream."
Humagulgol ako sa harap niya.
"Wake up now by reality."
Tinitigan ko siya ng maigi. I memorize his handsome face like a greek god. To his messy hair, to his hypnotizing eyes, thick eyebrows and lashes, pointed nose and reddish and soft lips that I just kissed earlier.
Yeah right, I just created him in my imagination. He's not true.
I have insomia... and turns out to be a maladaptive day dream disorder because I can't sleep. I just think and think, then he came.
When I realize everything now, I saw him slowly fading away in front of me.
I saw his smile that I always fell for.
"I love you, Jiya... even if this is not real. Sleep now, and tomorrow you'll wake up by the reality without me." That was his last word and he's gone.
I cried as I felt the cold breeze because of the midnight wind.
I screamed at the top of my lungs, and I yelled at the pain exploding inside me... and I know no one can hear me. No one can hear how hurt and pain I am.
Then I realized... I will always be alone in this dark place.
Jinn is just creation of my non stop day dreaming. And it pains me more.
I just wish he's real.
Because the only truth is... I love him, even if he's not true.
--
HartleyRoses