"For what it’s worth: It’s never too late to be whoever you want to be. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you find you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start over again."
F. Scott Fitzgerald
When the duo finally did reach the mall, it was in high hopes, the two felt light in the warmth of the shared karaoke and laughter that left a pleasant buzz surrounding them in the cabin of the car. As Morgan pulled into an outlet area, he paused, parking beside a grouping of other cars, turning to her, he smiled and offered her a pair of sunglasses, much like the ones he'd placed firmly on his face. Snorting, the Winchester placed them on, pushing them up the bridge of her nose happily.
Derek smiled at her, stepping out of the car and meeting the rest of the group who were leaning against their cars laughing. For now, it was Emily, Penny, Spencer and Rossi. JJ was spending the day with her family and Hotch has been, admittedly, left out of the outing.
Derek didn't feel bad at all.
Anyways.
Belle was greeted happily by the group, Spencer joining her side immediately as he talked about a book he'd recently read, Belle nodding along and adding to his points as Derek hugged and talked with the girls. Rossi smiled happily on the side lines, shooing Spencer away temporarily so he could say hello to his "new favourite person."
"How was the first night?" Garcia asked him, the jingle of her bracelets chiming as she wound her arm around Derek's.
The man sighed, "Good, a nightmare and panic attack but she was okay other than that I think."
Penny clicked her tounge in sympathy and Emily clapped her hands together, "So, where to first?"
All eyes snapped to Derek who glanced toward Belle, causing the huntress to raise her hands in the air as her cheeks brightened. "Uhm, how about a furniture store, so Belle can pick up some new bedding and decorations for her room?" As they made their way over, the young teen walked between Reid and Rossi, each poking fun toward the other as they shared stories. Rewarded every now and again with a snort or giggle from the teen and of course a wise assed remark here or there.
"I don't know, hes like a supercomputer." David said, wiggling a ringed finger in the air accusingly at the genius. "Like Google, his mind is quick."
Spencer opened his mouth to return a biting remark but Belle chimes in first, "Is his mind quick or are you just old?"
That resulted in the Doctor uncontrollably laughing as the elder man holds his hand to his chest in mock hurt, "That's it you're out of my will."
"I was in it?" The teen asks, her brow arched playfully.
Rossi just narrowed his eyes and poked her forehead, "well now you'll never know."
"Don't worry, I'll put you in mine." Spencer stated, nudging her with his shoulder.
The group is haulted infront of a shop window, "Hey pretty boy, kiddo, why don't we look around in here?" Derek asks, gesturing to it. They all file in the rather large store, immediately the group starts to split off, Belle wandered around trailing after Derek, Penny and Spencer as they walked toward the bedroom department, that's when Derek paused and narrowed his eyes, "What's your favourite colour?"
Belle froze, not expecting the question before she shrugged her shoulders, "I've never really had one." She says, her mind flashing back to deep pools of blue ruined by a flash of light and blinding pain. Not blue no blue. "Just, uhm, avoid blue?" She says, biting her lip slightly.
Penny nodded, moving toward the bedding, "How about... grey and yellow?"
Spencer shook his head, "Yellow promotes energy and excitement, not good for a bedroom," The man hummed as he ran his eyes over the patterns, "I'd say do a baby pink, it pairs with grey and allows for comfort, trust and sensitivity."
His eyes go to Belle who shrugs, "Pink is chill." She says as Garcia grabs a soft pink duvet and sheets. "Why don't you two kids go pick up some decorations while Baby Girl and I pick out curtains and stuff?" Derek asks the awkward duo, they both nod and take off in a random direction.
"So," Spencer begins as they stroll down a random aisle. "How are you feeling?"
The teen huffs, stopping to look at some succulents as she continues, "overwhelmed?" She sighs, twisting her lips, "look you guys are nice and all but I've lived in Motel rooms and the back of an impala since I was a toddler." She avoids eye contact with the doctor, her fingers trailing over the spines of a group of books they'd stopped infront of, "I've..." her voice stops as Spencer looks at her in confusion. "I've never had my own room..."
A pang of pain pierced through his chest, the knowledge of this almost 17 year old never having her own space, never having a safe area to retreat into just shattered him. She's always been so... exposed. Always looking over her shoulder, never sleeping in the same bed. It didnt sit right in his chest. "Oh." Reid says, but the teen shrugged him off, not wanting the sympathy.
"Its fine, just weird, you know?" The huntress asks, walking further down.
Spencer sighs, "You know my mom has, uh, schizophrenia?" Belle stopped, brows furrowed, "it's just, I had to take care of her as a kid, then I had to make the decision to put her in a hospital for around the clock care."
Belle looks up at the taller man, "Why are you telling me this?" She whispers, emotion layered on the edges of her voice.
"I think," Spencer begins, picking up a random knickknack, "that we know enough personal details about you. And that maybe... you'd like to hear something about me. Level the playing field." He admits.
She snorts, nudging her shoulder with his, "thanks doc," she says, ignoring the surprised look from the curly haired man. "Anyways, chick flick moment over, what the fuck is that thing?" She points to a weird, silver cat like figurine, a strange deformed eye slightly above the other, its tounge sticking out making a "blep" face. "Its fucking great." She states with a giggle, pulling it up into her hands, turning it. Spencer took it from her hands.
"We're getting it!" He declares, ignoring her protests, "nope its ours, we'll share custody." Belle starts giggling, as the man holds it up victoriously.
Belle started walking again as they continued to talk about the figure, "what's its name?" She asks, "its gotta have a name."
"How about..." Spencer trails, "Henosis, its named after the greek god of..."
"Unity," Belle finishes, "I like it, Henosis."
Spencer nods, "Hen-Hen for short."
They met up with the group again, Penny and Derek had a cart filled with an array of pink, grey and white blankets, pillows, and furniture. "What are you two up to, get anything?" He asks, eyes narrowing in on the cat in Spencer's hands, "Pretty boy, what is that?"
"Henosis." The two say in unison (haha). Derek shook his head as Penny awed at the duo.
After checking out and stopping Belle from hyperventilating over the price they moved on to another store, this time picking up more decor, and furniture. By the time they had put the first load in the car, it was half past noon and Rossi declared they needed to eat and that he would NOT step foot in the food court. So they ended up going to a small Italian restaurant across the street.
"Now this," the man says happily, "is italian." They were seated at a round table, no one mentioned how Belle had picked her seat in an area where she could see all entrances and exits in the restaurant, Derek seated to her left and Spencer to her right.
After ordering their drinks and meals they started talking, the team mentioning cases, and personal experiences, Belle giggling along with them. "And then," Rossi says, hands out infront of him as he moved them along with his story. "She turns to me and says, I've been here all night!"
The group erupts into laughter, Belle groans at the cheesiness, catching Emily's eye and the elder woman winks at her, cheeks rosy with happiness. "So, Belle, any funny stories from you?"
The teen paused, thinking for a moment before a smile sprung on her lips, "How about the first time my..." her voice trailed, thinking of the word, "Friend, saw snow for the first time?" She asks, Penny nodded excitedly.
Maine, 10 months ago, with Belle Winchester
Belle sighed after yet another hunt, her shoulders screaming in pain as she stayed still, fingers trailing down her arm, a scowl on her partner's face until the pain dissapeared. A warmth spreading through her skin. "Thanks Blue." She whispers, voice raspy.
"I wish you wouldn't get hurt so much." Jay says lightly, her eyes boring into the creamy skin of her counterpart. Her lips were close to the huntress' ear, sending goosebumps down her arms.
Belle shrugged, "I try, I don't think Demoms care much though."
Jaibrien rolled her eyes slightly as the teen shrugs again. Wincing at a creek in her shoulder sent pain shooting down her arm. The angel was up immediately, crowding her, "I thought I got rid of your pain."
Belle waved the supernatural being off, "It's a phantom ache, usually it only happens when it's about to rain."
"That doesn't make sense," the angel states, "you should not be in pain because of rain."
She shrugs, "It's just how us meat sacks work." The teen says, looking out the window. "And look at that, it's snowing."
"Snowing?" Jay echos, eyes flashing with a child like wonder, "I've never been in snow before."
Present time. With Belle and some of the team
"So basically, I had this friend who was from a super strict catholic family, and I mean they named all their kids after Angel's and Jay was the youngest of them." Belle explain, twirling her pasta on her fork.
"Jay?" Rossi echos, "Now my bible reading may not be up to date, but Jay is not the name of any angel I know."
Morgan was on a different level, "Friend or boyfriend?" He asks, wiggling his eyebrows.
"Her full name was Jaibrien." Belle says, eyes saddening a fraction before continuing, "not a traditional angel name." She admits, "But her brothers, Michael, Raphael, Samael..." She trails at the looks, "Plenty angel like, anyways she lived in a place where it never snowed and she was with me for a bit after... uh Dean. Anyways we were up in Maine and suddenly it started to snow one night."
Maine, 10 months ago, with Belle Winchester
Belle smiled brightly, "Well, let's go." The teen states, grabbing her leather jacket and pulling the Angel's arm.
The taller teen panicked, hand grabbing on her arm. "I don't think that's the best idea."
"Oh, come on blue, live a little, who knows when we'll be in a plane like this again?" The hunter grabbed the supernatural being, pulling her out the door as snow began to fall, the angel sitting frozen as she felt the small flakes melt on her dark skin. The snow catching in her vast curly locks, creating a beautiful contrast of white, snowflakes clinging to her eyelashes. The angel laughed as pushed her arms out, a child like laugh escaping her as she stared in wonder as snow fell harder. A single one falling on her nose causing her eyes to cross aa she watched it melt on the tip. Then her eyes turned to her huntress.
Belle was looking at her fondly, apple green eyes bright in the dark of the night. Her hair was down, wild curls falling down to her waist, cheeks and nose reddening with the cold.
Present time. With Belle and some of the team
"You should have seen her!" Belle giggled as the team watched her warmly, "a snowflake just landed on her nose and she watched it like a kitten." Belle rolled her eyes, twirling pasta on her fork again, "her eyes were just... shining, you know?" She asks, "she ended up slipping on a patch of ice and fell into a pile of snow the next morning, not so fond of it then." The entire team erupted with laughter,"and then the ass has the audacity to pulled me in with her!"
Flashes of giggles as the angel pinned the teen down into the snow, rolling them over as they shoved handfuls of powdery snowdrift at each other. "Its probably one of my best memories... you know?" She asks, taking a sip of her drink.
"That sounds so cute," Penelope gushes, as the waitress drops the cheque, pulling away their finished plates with it, Rossi snatching it before anyone can touch it. Smacking at the hands of his team members as he puts his card in and hands it off.
"Dude." Derek says, giving him a wtf look.
"It is my treat." David states. "I don't have anything else to spend my money on."
Emily cuts in before anyone can speak, "why don't Garcia and I bring Belle to get some clothes? You boys can pick up her new bed and stuff that should be ready."
Derek pauses, looking at Belle worriedly, "We can get that after Belle gets clothes." He says, heart clenching as anxiety runs through him.
"Uh, no offense, Chocolate Goodness but I think we'll need to pick up some things for Belle... you know. Girly stuff." Penny hints, watching as Derek's face fills with understanding.
His hands fly up to his chest in a surrendering gesture. "Ah, okay, stay safe, you two baby girl, you keep my kid safe okay? Back just how I'm giving her to you." He states, ignoring Belles cheeks warming at the name.
"Of course, I wouldn't have her any other way." Emily days, and Derek raises a finger at her.
"You take care of my girls." He states, eyes completely serious.
Garcia laughs, "We'll be gone, two hours tops, you boys do.... boy stuff while we wait. Maybe get yourself some clothes too."
"We'll give boy wonder a make over." Rossi states with a smile, patting said Doctor on the shoulder as he protested. The group split off as Belle was dragged to the first store.
"Now." Penny clapped her hands, twirling at the girl, "what do you normally wear?"
The teen stopped, overwhelmed by the hustle of workers and other women. "I uhm," her eyes look over at the two women, "flannels?" She says dumbly.
The friends exchange a glance as they pull the teen along, grabbing different styles of shirts, jeans, dresses, and shorts. After they talk to a worker, a teenager like Belle, she nods and brings them to a dressing room.
Soon Belle was pushed into a room, looking at the piles of clothing around her. Penny and Emily were waiting in the other room, sitting down and chatting as Belle pulled the first combo on, ripped dark jeans and a plain shirt that dipped below her neck line, looking at herself in the mirror, she nibbled on her lip. You could see the brand of... so proudly illustrated. It made her heart clench.
"I-im not sure about this." Belle grunts, eyes tracing the individual divets of feathers.
She heard Garcia click her tongue, "Its okay. Just us, come out so we can see."
Belle paused with a shaking breath as she stepped out, hands clenching at her sides as the women awed.
"I like the high waisted style of jeans on you." Emily admitted, "it makes your curves look very nice."
Penny nodded along, "Ooo lah lah," The blonde winked, "very pretty."
The brunette then frowned, "why weren't you sure, you look great."
Belle's hands traced up to her chest, "its just... " she trails, then Emily got a knowing look.
"Hey, Bee, I understand scars can be... intament." Emily says, "But you don't need to hide them."
Belle grunts, "I just..."
Garcia intervened, "We'll put it in the maybe pile."
The trio continued to try on clothes. Vetoing some and accepting others. Belle fell in love with a few button ups, Garcia convinced her to buy some striped high waisted pants that the teen begrudgingly admitted that she liked, and Emily encouraged her to buy a few more plain shirts, and, of course, a few flannels.
By the end of the pile they walked through the store again and Belle's eyes caught a rather cute pair of overalls. She stared at them, shaking her head and going to move on before a voice interrupts her. "You should get them." Her eyes turned to find Emily looking at the article of clothing. "I think you could rock them."
"I, uh, dunno." She sighs, the beautiful woman piercing her with a knowing
Prentiss grabs them, pulling them close to her body, folding them. "Its okay to like things, you know." It wasn't a question, Emily smiled and picked up two more pairs. "And a few back ups just in case."
A groan reaches the teens lips, "you guys are too nice."
The elder woman laugh, "nope, we're not, we're your family." Emily looks at her kindly, "you know that, right?"
"I know it," Belle admits, "but I'm..."
Emily finishes for her, "...still working on believing?"
"Yeah." She says, "I guess."
The brunette catches the teens leather clad wrist, "Well, I'm here if you need help, I'm trying to beat Penny in the competition to being your favourite aunt."
Belle laughed, "I've never had one of those before."
"Now you have two!" Garcia squeals, her arms full of pajama pants, tank tops, lounge shorts, sweatpants and sweatshirts. "I realized you didn't grab any sleeping clothes!"
The huntress shrugs, "I usually sleep in jeans and such."
Penny makes a sound of horror as she drops her pile in the trolly. "You poor baby!" She whispers grabbing Belle into a hug despite her protests and Emily's laughter.
Soon they had finished with all of the clothing, Belle had multiple new outfits, jackets, sweatshirts, sleeping clothes, intaments, shoes and boots.
Belle wasnt allowed to see the price as Garcia had covered her eyes when she tried to look. Most of today's shopping was covered by the money she got from the FBI to "re-enter society" as Emily explained.
The teen still felt terrible.
Each and everyone of them had arms full of bags that they deposited into the car before heading to the food court and grabbing something to drink, Penny insisted that the day couldn't end without milkshakes, this time Belle agreed.
They met up with the boys who had just finished with the furniture. As they started agreeing to leave Rossi stopped them, "I want to steal Belle for a bit." He says, wrapping an arm around the frozen huntress' shoulders. "You guys can head home and I'll bring her back to Derek's after."
Morgan agrees quickly, much to the teens surprise as the man nudges her goodbye, giving her a kiss on the crown of her head as they got into their cars, the team wishing her goodbye and Derek promising to see her back later.
Although he did give the same threat he'd delivered earlier, this time a tad more menacing.
They drove in David's car for a while, his radio playing softly as the song switches, familiar notes filling the car causing Belle's breath catches.
"I've waited a hundred years"
Lazy smiles fill the huntress' face as she feels the sway of her angel, the grasp of her hands on her hips as Jay sings along to the lyrics.
But I'd wait a million more for you
Nothing prepared me for
What the privilege of being yours would do
They hold each other, the field warm with twilight, as the music plays, the only thoughts on either mind completely focused on their soulmates touch.
If I had only felt the warmth within your touch
Belle sings to Jay, her voice sinking into the skin if her love.
If I had only seen how you smile when you blush
The angel continues, her fingers ghosting a touch along the hunters cheeks
Or how you curl your lip when you concentrate enough
Belle whispers, melting into the hold of Jay.
Well I would have known
What I was living for all along
What I've been living for
They sing, together, Belle being dipped as the angel laughs as the music reaches a crescendo.
Your love is my turning page
Where only the sweetest words remain
Every kiss is a cursive line
Every touch is a redefining phrase
The two twirl around the meadow,giggles and loving looks passing between the two.
I surrender who I've been for who you are
For nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart
Jay sings into the neck of her hunter, sweet kisses trailing her words.
If I had only felt how it feels to be yours
Well I would have known
What I've been living for all along
What I've been living for
Belle hums back, letting Jaibrien take her weight, the angel holding her so close that Belle felt the beat of her Angel's heart.
Though we're tethered to the story we must tell
When I saw you, well I knew we'd tell it well
With a whisper we will tame the vicious seas
Like a feather bringing kingdoms to their knees
The song faded, the two lazily swaying, locked together as the moon shined down on them. Sweet nothings and promised whispered into the wind, a moment locked into their minds. Warmth enveloping them, and there they stayed, as the moon fell and the dew enveloped their intertwined forms.
The rays of morning dull compared to the beauty of their love.
"Bambina? Kiddo?" Belle felt, a hold on her shoulder, her eyes wet with tears. Cheeks pink with dried tears, "Come on sweetheart, I need you to come back to me."
A shuttering gasp left the teens chest, "I- I'm sorry." She whispers as she realizes they've pulled into a parking lot. Rossi had his hands on her shoulders anchoring her as he spoke.
"You okay bambina?" He asks kindly as her attention returns to the elder man. "There's no need to apologize, you had a reaction, it's normal." Belle nodded, "You still up to some shopping?" The teen looks over to where they were parked.
"We're at an..." Belle began, her brows furrowed.
"Apple store, you need a phone and laptop." The elder man says. "And don't argue or I'll buy you a tablet too."
Belle's lips immediately shut, and she nodded. Following the elder man into the store as he gets her the most current phone and laptop, not listening to her protests as he adds a phone case and two pairs of headphones to the mix.
The two talk as the workers set up the phone, "I used to read your books tou know." Belle whispered, Rossi's eyes snapping to her. "I always liked them, they were interesting."
David smiles, "I'll sign the whole set for you." He says, "add a couple of other reads, I'm sure boy genius wouldn't mind recommending some books for you." He says, as the worker came back, handing him Belle's new items. "Now you're on my phone plan, unlimited everything, got it?"
Belle nods, shakily grabbing the new tech, putting the phone in her pocket and grabbing the bag filled with the rest.
They continued to chat on their way home, Rossi wishing her a goodnight as she stepped into the building where Derek was waiting for her. He beckons her inside as they made their way into the apartment.
"So kid, how was the trip?" He said happily, laughing at her unamused expression. "Yeah okay okay I threw you to the wolves."
"Twice!" Belle yelled mockingly, Derek only laughed harder before her handed her something.
Belle examines the object as complex emotions ran through her chest. "A key. You need to get into the appartment." He says.
"Can I..." Belle froze, cutting herself off as she lurches her body forward, wrapping her arms around her, hugging him.
The man freezes and softens, tightening his hold around her, the protective feeling filling him. "Anytime kid," he whispers, squeezing a bit harder before letting go. "Anytime."
They pull away, and Belle coughs awkwardly, Derek only brightening his smile, "Well, you'd better start on your room," he says, "I'm cooking dinner, chicken and dumplings sound okay?"
Belle nods, "they sound great." Slowly she made her way down the hall, making her way to her room, ready for setting things up when she paused, staring at the already set up area.
The bed was now covered in a fluffy white furred blanket with a baby pink base, matched with the same pink shade and gray pillows piled at the top, a new white desk and drawer were now in placed in the room. Twinkling fairy lights covering the wall, a bookshelf with different titles pilled on, next to it, a big white chair and pink throw blanket, walking over she saw a smiley face and small note on the bookshelf.
'Thought you'd enjoy some copies I had, also, look up - Spencer."
Bellw looked up and laughed, on her ceiling was an array of glow-in-the-dark stars, in accurate constellations.
Looking over to the desk in the corner, Henosis sat proudly on one side, other knickknacks that she definitely didn't remember picking out splayed across, a bright pink sticky note on the cup of pens and pencils.
Just some things to brighten your day -Penny
With a smile, she spun slightly.
Eyes falling on her bedside table, there sat a framed picture of the team. And another sticky note, this one from Emily.
Thought you'd like a picture of your new family, we'll update it when we get a picture of all of us next time - Emily
'Yeah,' Belle thought, 'next time.'
"Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family: Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one."
-Jane Howard
Please Read
Okay, so, I know Belle's new room seems to be a very feminine and stereotypical room.
There is a reason for that.
Belle is still young she's 16.
Also, her experience is based on my own.
Explanation time. TW ABUSE
So, I have had to grow up fast, be an adult yadada, but I have also been abused mentally and belittled and all that fun stuff, you have to put a front on, be strong, in public and at home. Until you get to your room, that is supposed to be a place of comfort. A safe place.
Belle would need that light and comfort in her life. Especially now.
Anyways, I just wanted to explain it and all that fun stuff.
Alright, we I hope you guys have enjoyed! I'll see you next time.
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