Eddy stared up at Brett's bedroom ceiling like he had done a dozen times before. It felt weird to be in Brett's bed and having Brett take care of him like this. It almost made him dream about how nice things could be.
He didn't really dare to dream, though. The deal they had was very clear.
...
Being on tour was equal parts fun and stressful, and sometimes the need to unwind came about. Taking some slightly longer showers or making use of the other being out getting them dinner seemed to be their only options for getting the release.
That was until they came back from an evening of drinking, stumbling through the door with unsteady steps before ending up sitting cross legged in their own beds. Eddy couldn't help but smile at how adorable Brett was when drunk, and how he fumbled to straighten his glasses.
"You know what's the most stressful about touring?" Brett slurred, sounding like he was about to go on a long rant. Eddy sighed and laid down on his back on the bed.
"What is it this time, then?" he asked, having heard most things that could be wrong now from food being wrong to missing seeing other friends. Eddy would listen to him complain about trivial things forever if he had to, though.
"I can't ever fucking masturbate properly," Brett whined, and Eddy's heart skipped a few beats. Especially when Brett continued his rant. "Would be easier if I could just fuck you or something."
"W... What?" Eddy stuttered, cheeks turning bright red. The thought of having sex with Brett had definitely passed his mind before, but hearing Brett say it still made him flustered.
"Would be easier if I could just fuck you," Brett repeated, shrugging. He was still slurring his speech slightly, making Eddy question his words.
"I mean... Would you want that?" Eddy asked, still all flustered. He tried to play it off as just not expecting such a comment, but the truth was that having sex with Brett sounded like a dream come true.
Brett shrugged again, laying down on the bed.
"Not the worst thing I've imagined," he mumbled, taking his glasses off. "Let's talk about it tomorrow, if you're up for it."
...
Waking up the next day, remembering the suggestion Brett had made the day before and now having to wait for him to wake up as well was nerve wrecking. Would Brett even remember what he had suggested?
He turned to study Brett's pink cheeks and long lashes as he slept soundly on his own hotel bed. The butterflies in his stomach tickled him and made him smile to himself.
"Mmh, morning," Brett mumbled as he opened his eyes, meeting Eddy's across the gap between their beds. "How are you feeling?"
"Bit of a headache, but mostly okay," Eddy mumbled, pulling his duvet up to his chin. "How about you?"
Brett shrugged and moved his pillow slightly to a better position.
"I'm alright, a bit hungry for the most part. Wanna get breakfast delivered to the room?" Brett suggested, pushing some hair away from his forehead as it was tickling him. "I guess we might have something to talk about, unless you don't want that."
How was it possible to be so calm about something like that? Eddy truly admired that, wished he could have it too. Instead his cheeks warmed up again.
"We have something to talk about, yeah," Eddy confirmed, licking his lips. The ball of nervousness was building in the bottom of his stomach even though the situation felt completely unreal still. Brett would actually discuss having sex with him?
Brett ordered them some breakfast before heading to the bathroom to wash up a bit. Eddy took the opportunity to swap out the jeans he had passed out in the night before with a pair of sweatpants and sat down at the little table.
Seeing Brett come out of the bathroom with no shirt was almost too much, but Brett spoke before he could react.
"Sorry, forgot to bring a clean shirt. Swear, I'm not parading the possibilities here," Brett joked, and as he found a t-shirt and pulled it over his head, Eddy felt his cheeks warm up for the millionth time.
There came a knock on the door, and Brett went to open for the room service lady. She greeted him with and asked where to put the food, and Brett showed her to the table where Eddy already was seated.
Brett sat down across from him when she left and grabbed the plate of eggs he had ordered for himself and a forl and knife.
"So, we talked about fucking," Brett said boldly, and Eddy almost choked on the piece of toast he had taken.
"Well, that was bold. Yeah, we did," Eddy confirmed, chewing his toash slowly. "Like a... Friends with benefits kind of situation, right?" He tried his best not to sound unsure as he said it and failed.
Brett laughed a bit and ran a hand through his hair.
"Yeah, it'll have to be that. I love you, man, but just as a friend. You didn't think..?"
"No, no, just what to call it and if it's gonna be a continuing thing and stuff," Eddy lied, turning bright red. Brett laughed again, but the assuring smile at the end made it okay.
"I know, bro, I'm just messing with you. So, this is a thing we're doing then. Have you even been with someone before, though? You've never told me about any," Brett asked, cutting up a piece of bacon on his plate. He seemed genuinely interested, which gave Eddy butterflies again.
Eddy took a sip of his still way too warm coffee before answering, not sure what kind of answer would be acceptable.
"Uh just... A few, like I had that fling with Mia in high school and we uh... We did it a few times, and then a few one night stands," Eddy explained, and Brett nodded as he took one of the bites of bacon he had cut up in his mouth along with some eggs.
"Any guys, though?" Brett looked up at Eddy, looking like he was almost worried. "Cause you know, it's a bit different."
Eddy nodded, biting down on his toast again.
"Yeah, had a one night stand with a guy. Never bottomed though," Eddy mumbled, again getting a light pink over his cheekbones.
"That's a thing too, who would bottom. I must admit I prefer not to, if I'm honest," Brett said as he grabbed a bite of the sausage on his plate. "What do you think about that?"
"I mean, I guess we could try me bottoming? Have never done that, though, so I don't know if..."
"If you like it. Totally get that," Brett finished for him with a small smile. "And if you're not into that, I guess we'll just... Talk about it then?"
Eddy nodded again, licking his lower lip nervously again. It still felt unreal, like someone would jump out and say it's a prank or something. Brett seemed sincere, though, and Eddy knew his best friend well enough to know he wouldn't do that to him.
"So, important question, condoms?" Brett asked, leaning back in the chair after grabbing his coffee cup, taking a break from the extensive breakfast. "Unless you have a secret uterus or any STDs I'll leave that for you to decide, as the bottom. I don't have any, by the way, unless I've gotten it from my hand in the last two months."
Eddy had to laugh with Brett at the last comment.
"Don't have any, and don't know of any uterus," he laughed and sipped his coffee. "I guess I'd be fine without, I don't know. We can try that, but maybe have some as backup?"
"Definitely. I can get some," Brett nodded, holding both hands around his cup to warm them. "I think we should establish a few other things as well though. Is this an exclusive thing, or can we fuck other people?"
Eddy ran a hand nervously through his hair. The idea of Brett being with anyone else made him want to throw up his toast.
"What do you want?" he asked back instead, not wanting to deny it outright if Brett didn't want that. It wasn't like they were entering a proper relationship.
"I guess it would be nice to change the scene every once in a while? Just as long as we're like super strict on condoms when we're with other people?" Brett suggested, eyeing up Eddy as if looking for a reaction.
"Sure, sounds good," Eddy said, smiling to hide his heart shattering into a million pieces. He shoved the last piece of toast into his mouth.
"And Eddy? Let's keep it to just fucking, yeah? To avoid any... drama... between us. I value our friendship, and I don't want to lose you over this," Brett said, much more serious now.
"What do you mean by just fucking, though?" Eddy asked, feeling his stomach twist again.
"No like... romantic stuff, like kissing and stuff. Just to keep it clear it's just friends with benefits, no misunderstandings," Brett explained, putting his half empty coffee cup back on the table and grabbing his fork again.
Eddy nodded quietly, trying to seem like he was considering it instead of struggling to breathe.
"Sounds good," he eventually said. "No misunderstandings."