Xander for you !!!
Nathaniel.
I wake up early to the sound of dad and Leonard laughing to something. I sit up straight and check the time, only six. But as much as I try to send myself back to sleep I end up thinking of mom. Where is she right now? Is she fine? I really don't know.
I take a shower and put on black jeans, a plain white shirt and my California printed jacket. I debate on what to do right now, obviously I cannot go to school now, wait- I can go to school now.
"Hello Nate, I want you to meet my friend here Julia" I look up and smile at Sage and Julia and I look back at my phone.
"Hie" I say.
"Hey, have you been hanging out with Xander? Is he mad at me?" I look up at her again.
"He is never with me anymore so I have no idea"
Sage sits opposite me along with Julia. "He is never with me too" she frowns. I then remember the last time when I snatched his phone, there was about 'a friend with benefit.' I got too involved with myself that I forgot to ask him about it. Xander is never the type of person to cheat, besides he has been with Sage for over two years now... he can't just... cheat on her right?
I look back at Sage who is frowning making it clear we are thinking of the same thing. My eyes dart to the brunette next to her, Julia. I haven't seen her anyway around here. She must be new here. She is very pretty with-
"Hey" Xander appears from nowhere and kisses Sage's cheek. She passively smiles. He greets Julia by name making it clear I am the only who doesn't know her. Judging by the way she is pretty I should be knowing her... right?
"Dude I went to your house and this old lady opened the door and claimed you don't there anymore" Xander questions me with disbelief painted on his face. "I can't believe you never told me you moved away"
For a split second my heart stops before I look up at Xander. He notices my look and he frowns. "Nate, you're good?" I look back at my phone.
"What, you think I am not. Dude I was going to tell you today"
"You're doing it again" he whispers loud. My eyes dart to Sage who is looking at his boyfriend's overreacting phase.
"Doing what?" I question him. Julia clears her throat looking over at Sage and they stand up at the same time. "That thing, like... like you're trying to hide something from me!"
"The fuck!? Now I am the one who is hiding something. I have no idea who you are fucking behind your girlfriend's back, and you... you have been hanging with during lunch. You are the one is completely bitching up!" I yell back.
Someone shush us up, I bet it is the librarian.
"No I am not. You just-"
"Just leave me alone and my life alright!" I stand up snatching my bag from the floor and walk out of the library. What is going on with me? I walk to the parking lot before I remember I no longer have my phone. Fuck! I close my eyes trying to calm myself. I know I should have just told him what is going on. Like everything, but... I just couldn't. I know he is my best of all friends. Even if he doesn't hang out with me at lunch, he will always have my back. But he is also hiding something from me too.
I hear some footsteps somewhere behind me. Classes have already started so I didn't expect to see anyone out here. I turn to see someone with a hood up walking fast to the main entrance. I recognize the small frame and the straight walk. Elia. I watch him trying to walk away from me.
"Hey fag!" he stops for a moment before he continues to walk away.
"Elia!"
"You know I am surprised that you know my name huh?" he looks at me removing his hood. "I thought you thought my name was 'fag' from birth Nathaniel Sandas." I could almost the taste the sarcasm in his voice. As I walk closer to him I see the bruises still on his face. His face shows no emotion at all. Here he goes again, doing that thing again, showing no emotions. If I was not me I would definitely fear him because of that look.
"Hey! Don't talk like that to me"
"Or what?" he asks challenging me. "What will you do?"
"Why is everyone in a bad mood today?" I snicker finally stopping in front of him. His eyes flicker from my top to bottom, immediately going up to meet my eyes.
"I am not in a bad mood" he snickers back. "I am just trying to hold a conversation with you, like you know how it goes when you are talking the bad boys"
"I would appreciate it if you go back in the shell and act so childish" I fold my arms close to my chest. "I like you better like that."
"So you are actually saying you like me?" he tries to act bold but the color on his face betrays him. "I mean the boy who always calls me names and all likes me, wow congratulations Elia Clinton, your dreams are finally reality"
I debate whether he means it or not. Of course I like him, like I try to hate him but at the end of the day I want to hang out with him more. I want him to be my friend. At the same time I find it super intimidating to be around him, I am scared to like him more than I ever want to. I am scared of "liking" this beautiful boy in a different way.
"If I hated you, would I have fixed your stupid nose?" I challenge his sarcasm.
"I didn't say you hate me... I'm asking you like me?" "In case you cant read in between the lines, I wouldn't blame you for it though, you are stupidier than my nose" I fall in to a gale of laughter.
"Is that even a word?" I ask. His face turn red.
"You know I am Italian right?"
"Like I care"
"But if you like me and applying to be my friend like this then you should, but the thing is... I would have liked to be liked by you but at the end of the day I am still a 'fag', 'cock sucker' and all" he takes another step forward, now looking up at me his face as emotionless as ever. "You will push me away and I hate being hurt"
I gulp looking down at his ruined face, his eyes searching answers into mine. "I... I" My throat tightens. My eyes dart to his cut bottom lip as he licks on it. When I look up to his eyes I notice how they are focused on mine. I step back mentally shaking the thoughts of kissing him off my head. "Let's go" I take his arm by the elbow and search for his car until I find it.
"Go? Where?" he asks trying to pull my hand off. I hold onto his' tighter and stop by his car.
"Somewhere, and you'll see I won't hurt you"
Elia looks at me like I am insane the same time as my mid is telling me I am insane. I point at his car and he finally gives in with a sigh.
"Where ever you are taking me, make sure I will not regret it" he opens the door the same time as I do.
What am I doing?
The challenging Elia disappears as soon as we get into the car. He turns the radio on reducing the volume to very low making the awkward silence get worse. I direct him to where I want us to go. It takes everything I have not to look at Elia as he drives.
"Why so quiet?" I turn to look at him. He scrunches his face making me wonder if I am annoying him He doesn't reply me just keeps his eyes on the road. "Now you won't answer me?"
"I can't drive and talk at the same time so if you still need your life you can as well shut up" he doesn't look away from the road. I realize how hard he is gripping the wheel, making me wonder again if it one of his first months driving. I don't ask, just opening my phone and go through my Instagram account as always. "Left turn"
As Elia stops his car by the parking area, his face scrunches in distaste.
"Why are we here? I hate crowded places!" he exclaims not pretending to even like it. I feel guilt engulfing me. Of course I should have told him my plans, I don't intend to force him into areas he is not comfortable with, but that was my whole plan all along wasn't it? To take him to a place he will never feel comfortable in. "But I don't know what you like, except me of course" I say coldly
He groans. "Whatever" my heart stings as he goes back into his shell looking down with his face reddening.
"Hey, you calm down, a few people visit the local bar during the day, it's not crowded... that much"
I must suck, but I haven't started sucking yet. There is a place inside this bar, a 'place' where he will hate. That I know, but I seem not to care. I smirk stepping out too. I make sure Elia is walking ahead of me in case he will resort to some plan B. He walks slow I bet debating on either he wants to go in or not.
"Just so you know! I don't fucking drink"
"Anyone will guess that" I tell him. He slides the metal door open wiping his hands on his jeans after making me snicker. I enter and close the gate. I see Johnny standing by the door.
"Fuck, I am not even eighteen yet" Elia stops looking at Johnny. I bet he feel intimidated by him. I mean he is tall, buff, filled with body art of all sorts. "Don't mind him"
"Ah! Nate, long ti- wait I know you" he points at Elia. "You're the boy I gave a smiley piercing the other time"
"A what?" I ask.
"Um, hie?" Elia's face turns red as he semi waves at Johnny.
"You know the piecing on the upper frenulum" Johnny somehow manages to high five Elia's waving hand.
Upper frenulum? That reminds me the other time I thought I saw some silver balls on Elia's teeth but he brushed it off.
"Can I see it?" I ask him. He disapproves by completely ignoring me.
"Hey Johnny, I wanna take him to the area you know? But he isn't eighteen yet" I tell him. I look at Elia fumble with his shirt. "Get in, just avoid Lee"
"Thank bud"
As we step inside the smell of alcohol hits my nose to the point that I could taste it, on my side Elia is close to me. I was wrong, this place is super crowded. I end up taking Elia's hand as I make my way to the 'area'. I won't lie that something leaps in my stomach as our skins touch. We walk past people dancing to country music.
"Where are we going?" it is my turn to ignore him too. I walk to the back of the room. I stop before passing through the curtains. I turn to face Elia as his eyes widen at the sudden stop as we get too close. I place my hands on both his upper arms. "I am so sorry Elia."
He tries to pulls me away but I just pull him into the curtains.
"Oh, oh... oh my God!"
GUYS! I am finally done writing my exams, so i think i will be updating everyday... WOAH WOAH i am not promising, but i will try to. Just know i will not take two days without updating, this i promise. Anyways, help me spot some errors, i am too lazy right now to edit and all... And tell me what you think, tell me if you love or hate it, if you hate it...i will help by making it better for you. And i am open for suggestions, actually i need them.
Thank you for reading.