Apart from an impromptu visit to the shrine and being taken out to breakfast by Kannon, my twenty first birthday was no different to any other day. And, as usual, the most interesting part of it was being able to speak to Sasuke at the end.
"Okay, so tell me your plan for next week."
I sighed as Sasuke shot me a quizzical look, and recited my weekly timetable for him to see if it met his standards.
"Monday, Wednesday and Friday are my training days, every other day is a rest day," I grumbled. "Mondays are dedicated to wind, Wednesdays are dedicated to water, Fridays are dedicated to fire. Because of my recurring nightmares about the yuujin, we're going to cut down the amount of training time we spend on that to give my mind a break. Taijutsu will also be minimal- close to zero- and genjutsu will remain untouched. Questions?"
"And what will you do on those rest days?"
"Rest."
Sitting with him arms folded and legs crossed, Sasuke nodded in approval.
"Of course, this schedule is subject to change," he added, making me sigh. Don't get me wrong, I liked rest. But four days a week? There's only so much "rest" a person needs.
"Yes, yes, the further into the pregnancy we get the less time I'll spend on the training grounds," I groaned, sinking down into my seat. "At least let me relish these few months, okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, whatever."
***
True to my word, I stuck to the plan I had proposed to Sasuke. And even though it wasn't as full on as what I had previously been doing, it helped keep me busy for a good portion of the week. My routine had a steady ebb and flow, and very quickly it became apparent to me that my life here in Suna was alarmingly beginning to mirror the one I had had at the Uchiha compound; but of course, a much better version of it.
I found that the less time I spent training, the better my sleeping pattern became. The nightmares of the yuujin attacking me had ceased to plague my nights, and I found myself being able to relax more. Being able to spend more time with Ayumi had its perks too; more often or not, the two of us would find ourselves back in Sasuke's cell, just talking and hanging out together. For once in a while, I was glad to have routine back in my life, but only because it was a routine that I chose for myself.
The only thing that really changed during this time was the size of my baby bump. February and March passed by, and then all of a sudden in April I started showing signs of carrying. It became more and more apparent in May, and it was then that the Kazekage called me into his office to deliver some news.
"Amaterasu, radiant as ever," greeted Gaara as Kannon and I entered his office one day, pushing Ayumi in ahead of me. As the bump had been growing, so was she. And I couldn't be more excited.
"Hello," I said in reply to the Kazekage, surprised to see that he was joined by the Hokage behind him. Seeing this too, Kannon raised an eyebrow and tightly shut the door behind her before joining me before the two Kage.
"What's up?" Casual but with concern evident on her face, Kannon sat down and pulled her chair up to the Kazekage's desk, a questioning look in her eyes. At that, Gaara fleetingly looked over at Lady Tsunade, who was standing behind him and staring out of his window with a great big frown on her face. Gaara in turn looked over his shoulder at her for a reply.
"Lady Tsunade, should I...?"
The Hokage was silent as he turned back to Kannon and I, where we awaited whatever news they had prepared for us.
"Sasuke is to be released next month," said Gaara, albeit with a hint of reluctance in his voice. "After months of deliberating, it seems that the Uchiha have finally come to terms with our compromise. I believe that after losing control over the Lands of Rivers and Grass, they realised that they need Sasuke urgently, to return and reconquer their lost territories. In exchange, we have been promised one of their less important members of the clan, but we couldn't care less about them. What matters to us is that this is the perfect time for Naruto to return to us, as he will be one of the changeover squad accompanying that member here."
I only picked up one thing.
"So Sasuke's... leaving?"
My heart sank. Just a little bit.
"Yes, but that's not what matters. What matters is that throughout this period, Naruto has had an ample amount of time to collect more data regarding the Uchiha's next moves, and how we can counter them. Now that he finally has the opportunity to return to us, we can break out of this standstill and make a move before they do."
"So when's the changeover going to be?" asked Kannon, glancing over at Tsunade, who was still staring out at the village below her in absolute silence.
"June the thirteenth," answered Gaara. "A handful of Senju and Suna shinobi will escort Sasuke to the rendezvous point, led by Kakashi Hatake. Even though they say they're giving us one of their men in exchange, we can't trust the Uchiha not to do anything dodgy. And when I say the Uchiha, I mean Sasuke too. That's why I'm going to ask you not to relay any of this information to him. About the exchange, about Naruto, about anything. You don't have to stop visiting him, but... just keep this to yourself."
It was silent until the Hokage spoke.
"We aren't asking you. This is an order."
I sat up straight as Tsunade turned around and looked at me with complete seriousness on her face, arms still crossed.
"You are forbidden from relaying any of these details to Sasuke. You may be the ultimate weapon people are seeking, but at the end of the day, you are still a citizen of Konoha, and answer to the Hokage. The only reason I'm allowing you to hear any of this information is because of Gaara. Kannon, you make sure that none of this finds its way to Sasuke, okay?"
"Yes, Hokage-sama."
"When will Sasuke find out about the exchange?" I asked, feeling the enormity of Tsunade's words.
"When we come into his cell to take him out," said Tsunade with a staunch voice. "So until the thirteenth, he will know nothing, and neither do you. Understood?"
"Yes, Hokage-sama," Kannon and I said in unison, heads bowed.
"Very good."
***
"Well, that news aside... are you excited to find out the gender?"
That night, Kannon and I sat in my room, eating dinner together. Beside us, Ayumi sat complacently in her pram, and an
"Yeah, I guess," I shrugged, not really processing anything. I was still trying to adjust to the thought of Sasuke leaving already, even though we had had a good five months together. This news overshadowed that of the gender reveal I would be having tomorrow, where Shijima would tell me if my baby was going to be a girl or a boy.
Kannon sighed and pushed her tray aside, shaking her head at me.
"You look worried. Talk to me."
I put down my chopsticks, grabbing my hair.
"I'm not worried about not telling him about his release," I began, feeling myself about to implode. "I have no problem withholding that information from him. But like... when will I see him again? Will I ever see him again? What happens after this? How long will this war last? I mean... I'm not dumb. I know that as soon as Sasuke goes back, he'll resume his duties. Oh my god, Kannon, what if he goes back and... you know? Goes back to being his old self? What happens then?"
"Tera, I think what you're trying to say is, "what happens to us?""
I froze as Kannon raised an eyebrow at me, reading right through my rant.
"I know you don't care about the war. Well, you do, but not as much as you care about Sasuke and your children. What are you really afraid of?"
Like the emotional bitch I was, I felt my eyes beginning to water, and lifted my hands to my face automatically.
"Oh my gosh, why am I like this," I choked, as a look of compassion crossed Kannon's face. She stood up and came to my side, hugging me tightly as I felt myself begin to cry.
"I'd say hormones, but that doesn't help," she said reassuringly, leaning her head on my shoulder. "Why don't you tell me what's up?"
"I've gotten attached to him," I sobbed, covering my face in shame. "More than I should be, Kannon. Why am I like this? What did I expect, for him to be locked up until everything blew over and the war ended?"
"Are you scared that if Sasuke leaves, he'll forget about you?"
"I'm scared because I've gotten so attached to him, and he's told me over and over again that being together is what he wants, but now I'm thinking, is it only because I kept him company? Now that he's going to be released to go back home, who's to say he won't just forget about everything that was said here and move on with his life? I'm scared that he's giving me false hope, Kannon. What if I was just entertainment for him while he was here? What if it was all an act, and he's actually just here to get more information on me for the clan? I'm scared because I trusted him so much, but now that he's leaving, I'm beginning to doubt his intentions. What if it was all a lie?"
Kannon sighed as I broke down into tears in her arms, hushing me and rubbing my back.
"First of all, stop it," she said, running her hand through my hair. "Second of all, has there been a time when you have ever doubted Sasuke and his words?"
As I struggled to breathe between sobs, I tried to rake through my memories to see if there had ever been a time I doubted him. I couldn't think of one, but then again, who's to say I didn't notice because I was foolish enough to believe everything he said was true?
"I can't think of one," I said mournfully, wailing into Kannon's shoulder.
"There you go. I wouldn't be worried if I were you. If you ask me, Tera, I think Sasuke's serious about everything he's ever said. I've thirdwheeled your dates enough to see this for myself. Let me clear all of your worries right here, right now.
"First of all, don't doubt him, or his intentions, or his words. I don't know about you, but compared to the past Sasuke I've heard about, I feel like this locked up Sasuke is a much more mellow and truthful one. He's a lot of things. He's an asshole, he's crazy, and sometimes just downright merciless. But! He's not a liar. All those talks you guys had about your feelings, and how you envisioned your future being... I don't think he was lying about any of it.
"Second of all, if you're worried about him forgetting you and moving on, then you can forget about that. You're unique, and there aren't many girls like you- if any- out there. You can rest assured that once all this mess is cleaned up, he's going to find his way back to you and your children, one way or another. You can't deny his loyalty.
"Third of all... uh... well... you're amazing," finished off Kannon sloppily, running out of things to say. "Uh... well, you could ask Sasuke all this yourself, but since he doesn't know he's being shipped out soon, that's not a good idea..."
"Kannon, he's young," I managed to utter through my sobs. "It wouldn't be a problem for him to find someone else."
"Tera, do you love him?"
"Why are you even asking me that?"
She sighed and pulled me even closer, shaking her head.
"My advice to you? Forget all this," she said soothingly. "You have a few more weeks left with him. When he leaves, he leaves. If he comes back, he comes back. You don't know how long it'll take. Once he leaves, you have to focus on yourself, and the baby, okay? Oh, and Ayumi too. But do you get what I mean? Whatever happens, happens. Just trust in the process.
"Just trust Sasuke."
With a pat on my back, Kannon released me from her grip and gave me a great big smile.
"Cheer up, buttercup! We get to find out whether you've got a Shisui or a Kannon in your belly!" she said cheerfully, making me laugh.
"Really? Kannon?"
"Just a suggestion!"