Dont mind my crappy fan art lmao. Hemmotran
I quickly enter the dressing room, prepared to start the concert, but definitely not prepared to face paisley.
I had gone over it in my head a million times, I had known exactly what I wanted to say. But then, a certain thought had run across my mind.
What if she has moved on?
When that thought registered through my tiny little brain, I bolted back to the dressing room. Now the concert starts in ten minutes and I am not prepared to see her at all.
I thought I had this good and all planned out, but now, everything has changed.
What if she doesn't feel the same about me anymore? What if she shows up with a new boyfriend? What if they're engaged? What if she's already married? What if....
I begin to sob in the dressing room, the salty tears entering my mouth and sliding all over my red face. I yank on my hair and groan in frustration.
After about two minutes of this, I hear a knock on the door. I quickly try and compose myself and make sure I look semi okay before walking over to it. I take a deep breath and then open it, relieved that it is only Calum.
"Come on man, show starts in five minutes." He says, oblivious to my state right now. I'm actually kind of glad though.
"Okay." I say, taking more deep breaths to avoid from thinking about this again.
"Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know." I mumble to myself. I know it's frozen, but that advice is perfect for a time like this.
"Well now they knoooooowww." Calum screams, making me burst into giggles. "What? You started it!" Calum says, punching me on the shoulder and laughing. At leased I have someone to talk to if this does go downhill.
We prepare to go on stage, Calum with his bass, Ashton with his bandana and drumsticks, and then Michael and I with our guitars. I made sure that I was wearing everything that Paisley liked, just in case. Which was a red flannel, the black beanie, skinny jeans, and I also have my notebook on stand by just in case.
5, 4, 3, 2, go!" Ashton screams, then we walk out on stage, the arena bursting with screams. We wave like always, then take our places.
"Heeellllllooooooooo mannnitooobbaaaa!" Calum yells into the microphone. The screams get louder and louder. This is probably the best crowd we've had since New Zealand.
I look around as Calum speaks to the crowd, trying desperately to find paisley without anyone noticing.
My eyes dart around until I finally spot a certain red headed girl. Jocelyn. I smile and look beside her, only for no one to be there looking back.
My smile fades and I struggle to move my eyes from that spot beside Jocelyn. But I do, and I play it off as a dance move. Laughter fills my ears and I smile a little. It's fake.
"This first song.... is a new song. Written by the one and only.... Huke lemmings." Ashton speaks, giggling lightly into the microphone.
I nod my head and walk up to the microphone, prepared to speak.
"This song.. It means a lot to me. I wrote it for a special person who I still love very much. This is 'Everything I didn't say'." I speak into the microphone. I'm a little upset that paisley isn't here to hear this song, I wrote it just for her. Actually, that's a lie, I'm about to burst into tears because her beautiful face isn't here.
"Woah, woah, This is everything I didn't say." We all sing.
"Wait, don't tell me, heaven is a place on earth, I wish I could rewind all the times that I didn't
Show you what you're really worth (what you're really worth)." Calum sings, his lisp making it kind of funny, but kind of cute in a little kid way.
"The way, you held me, I wish that I had put you first
I was wrong I admit, numb from your kiss, While you were slipping through my fingertips."
Then all of us join in together.
"Taking every breath away
With all of the mistakes I made,
From all the letters that I saved,
This is everything I didn't say,
I wish I could've made you stay,
And I'm the only one to blame,
I know that it's a little too late,
This is everything I didn't say,"
"Whoa, whoa
This is everything I didn't say" the crowd erupts into a cheer, I guess they like it...
Then it goes back to my part.
"Wake me up now, and tell me this is all a bad dream, All the songs that I wrote, all the wrongs that I hoped would erase from your memory (erase from your memory), Holding onto a broken and empty heart, Flowers I should've bought, all the hours I lost, Wish I could bring it back to the start."
We all join in again.
"Taking every breath away
With all of the mistakes I made,
From all the letters that I saved,
This is everything I didn't say,
I wish I could've made you stay,
And I'm the only one to blame,
I know that it's a little too late,
This is everything I didn't say."
This next part was the toughest part of the song to write for me. I don't know why.
"I hope you know, for you I'd sacrifice, To make this right, whoa whoa, Someday, I'm sure,
We'll pass each other by, Until that time."
"Taking every breath away
With all of the mistakes I made,
From all the letters that I saved,
This is everything I didn't say,
I wish I could've made you stay,
And I'm the only one to blame,
I know that it's a little too late,
This is everything I didn't say."
"Whoa, whoa
This is everything I didn't say
Whoa, whoa."
We finish, the cheers progressively get louder and louder until my ears are slightly ringing. We've never played that song before, but id say that it had a pretty good turn out.
I glance around the arena yet again, a habit of mine when I don't know what else to do, but when I catch sight of the red headed girl again, I gasp.
There stands Paisley, beautiful as ever. She's staring right at me, her face a blank expression. I stare back, my face portraying the same. I'm shocked, frozen to the spot as I exchange the most heart wrenching gaze in the world with the person I care most about. It's honestly like those movies where time stops and it's only us two.
"Luke! What did we do to prepare for this concert?" Calum yells into the microphone, that makes me break eye contact with paisley and look back up at him. It takes a minute to register what he had said, I was to caught up in daydreaming about her to pay much attention.
"Well... We sang frozen." I say, laughing a little. But my eyes keep darting back to paisley. She actually showed up. She's still beautiful, still an angel, still everything I had hoped as well. I feel my breath catching in my throat every time I breathe in.
"What song Lucas?" Michael asks, smirking at the crowd.
"Obviously 'let it go'." I smirk back. But I don't feel like myself, I feel awkward now, and sad, but happy, and a little nervous too.
"Anyways." Ashton's voice comes out of no where, we all laugh and then look at him.
"As you might've noticed from my shirt... A very special person is here tonight." Ashton speaks, looking past me and into the front row. I look at his shirt and see that he has "paisley" painted across the front of it.
Oh god.