Going Under

Chapter 37:

The day is cloudy and threatening to rain in the afternoon. I feel good after a good night of...sleep.

As soon as I arrived to Carter's, I had a coffee with Lauren and found out that Mr. Carter would show up only after lunch because he has an important meeting. Beth is with him, obviously. She's his assistant. So I find myself alone in my office now. Working my ass off.

I agreed to meet up with my mother for lunch in two hours and I don't feel excited at all, but she wants to talk. The topic is not a secret to me: she'll try to convince me to move back into her apartment now that my father isn't living there anymore.

-

*You okay so far?* Kyle texts me and I smile at his concern, though it's a little too much.

*yup. He's not here :)* I reply. *gonna meet mom for lunch. Ttyl* I send.

I grab my purse and leave the office, waving goodbye at Lauren. I agreed to meet my mom at the restaurant nearby the office, so I take around ten minutes to walk there.

"Hey" I greet my mom when I take my seat in front of hers.

"Hi dear. How are you?" She sweetly asks me, gesturing with a hand in the air to the waiter.

"Good and you?" I ask.

"Well.. I think I'm good" she shrugs. The waiter approaches us and we make our orders, and he leaves right after that.

"So, you wanted to talk?" I ask her.

"Yes" she clears her throat. "I... Well I'd like to ask you again to move back home. I miss you. And I don't want to be alone there" she says.

"Sorry mom, I can't. I'm good with Kyle and I won't take any risks on coming back home"

"You can't be seriously believing your father will get out. Honestly, Sam. He'll stay there for so long" she begs.

"I don't care, mom. I'm not doing this" I stubbornly say.

The waiter gives us our plates and we have lunch in silence before she speaks up again.

"Are you okay though? You know... Clean?" She quietly asks me, watching in anticipation.

"Yeah. I have a drink here and there but always at home and always with Kyle" I mumble.

"He's good for you, isn't he?" She smiles.

"I guess so" I shrug.

"Have you been smoking?" She suddenly asks.

"Not as much as I used to, and not weed. But yes" I glare at her. What an unpleasant conversation.

"Please, just think about coming back home okay?" She asks one more time.

"Mom, no way!" I snap. "I won't do that. What if he gets out? What happens? I'll have to leave again?"

"He won't come back home never again, Samantha" she breathes.

"How? If he gets out of jail of course he will..."

"I'm asking for the divorce" she admits. I shut up immediately, without any reaction. I'm sure my inner goddess is celebrating with a glass of wine and a roll of weed, but right now I feel... Nothing. "My lawyer is working on this already. It won't take long" she explains. "Since he's in jail he can't make any decision; he will just sign it."

"Oh" I gasp. "Good for you then" I say and we finish our lunch in silence.

-

It's almost five pm when Beth comes into the office. She literally just got here with Mr. Carter.