Going Under

Chapter 28:

By the time Kyle and I leave the court building together, Karen is nowhere to be seen so I really don't have any other option but leave with him. "So, how was it?" he asks me when we get into the car. 

"Well, nothing less than I was expecting... I have to pay like 600 dollars" I roll my eyes. "At least you're not going to jail" he shrugs. 

"Can we please talk?" I suddenly ask him. "About what?" he quietly answers my question with another question. I don't even know what is supposed to be talked about, but I just feel that we do need to talk. "Well... us?" I say with a squeaky voice, too embarrassed to look at him, so I just look down at my lap, but I still can feel his smile towards me. 

"Well...?" he encourages me to keep going. "I don't know!" I snap, finally looking at him "It's about time for us to discuss what we have. I mean... What the fuck are we?" I ask him and he giggles. 

"I'm pretty sure you made it very clear to me that we're nothing more than friends" he raises an eyebrow to me, and then look ahead of him again. "Well, I think that ship is already sailed, isn't it" I sarcastically say. 

"Why are you saying this?" he asks me, holding back a laughter. "I mean, there are fuck buddies, and I believe we were that, but... well I don't fucking know" I groan "never mind, we don't have to talk about it" I shake my head and stare out the window. 

"It'd be good if we did though" he mumbles and I look back at him. He's looking at me with is eyebrows raised up, his eyes smiling with his lips. Is he finding this amusing? "Asshole" I growl at him and he laughs. 

"Hey" he puts his hand over my thigh and gently squeeze it. "It's fine to talk about feelings, you know. It's not wrong" he says and I roll my eyes, slapping his hands away. "Fuck off. I don't talk about feelings, I'm not even sure I have them" I say.

"Oh, of course you do" he laughs "everyone has feelings, they just take a little time to see that" he shrugs and I roll my eyes again. "Please, let's not go there" I beg. "Okay, but I still think it'd be a good thing to talk about. We've been together for like, a month or two now and we haven't talked about our relationship" he says.

"That's because we don't have one" I shrug, "I mean... I don't know, I've never been in a relationship I don't know how this fucking thing works" I admit it. 

"I've been in a few" he simply says "and I also don't know how it works, so I think we're fine" he laughs, putting his hand over my thigh again, but this time I reach for his hand and stroke his knuckles slowly. 

"Don't worry" he says after a few seconds, startling me. "I won't push you to talk about it to me. I know it's hard for you... for some reason" he shrugs and I smile at him, thanking him. 

"Should I drop you off Karen's?" he asks me after a few minutes. "I.. I don't know?" 

"It's up to me then?" he asks and I shrug, because I already know what his decision will be, and I don't feel bad with it at all. 

-

As soon as the door is slammed closed, Kyle pushes me hard against it, with his hands on my hips lifting me up against the door, and I wrap my legs around his waist. I had no idea I missed him that much to be honest. 

I know exactly what he's doing though. He said he wouldn't push me to talk about the damn feelings, but he's indirectly doing it, by making me feel the things and maybe talk about it by an impulse. 

I gently tug at his hair, pulling it away from me for a while so I can breath and he takes advantage of that to kiss all the way through my neck, and I let him because this feels so damn good. 

"God" I gasp and I feel his smile against my hot skin, then he bites the sweet spot under my ear, going straight back to my lips and slamming his own agaisnt me. 

He walks with me wrapped around him and we both fall over the couch, I'm on top of him; taking advantage of that, I'm quick to remove his shirt before he turn us around and now he's hovering over me. 

"I. Missed. You" he whispers, each word a kiss on my lips, my neck and my shoulder. Sweet baby jesus!!!

He takes off my shirt and throw it to the air, kissing the curve of my breast, cupping one with his hand. 

"Talk to me" he whispers in my ear when he's back at my neck. What? I just gasp in reply, and hes repeats. "Talk to me" his voice is raspy and breathless and it makes me so.. hot. 

Such a clever asshole. 

"I missed you" I whisper breathless. If he wants me to talk to him, about the damn feelings, and in the middle of foreplays, then he'll have it. "I really... reaaaally missed... you" I breathlessly say, feeling his lips all the way down on my stomach. 

"I.. I won't leave you ever again" I say, feeling his hands working on the button and the zipper of my jeans and just slowly opening them. He suddenly looks up at him, as if he was asking for permission. Since when does he needs it anyway? I just close my eyes and lean my head back, and he got it. He quickly pulls my jeans down, removing them totally and they're soon joining to our clothes on the floor. 

"I won't let you go anyway" he says, kissing my low stomach. "Tell me..." he whispers, "tell me how do you feel" 

"I want you" I immediately say and he chuckles against my skin, kissing my intimacy over the thick fabric of underwear. 

"No" he says. "Tell me how do you feel about me" 

I wide my eyes at him. He can't be seriously saying that we're having this conversation right now. The last time we almost talked about it, I ran out of this place, and I really didn't want this to happen again. Maybe I should just talk to him about it, but how am I supposed to talk about my feelings if I don't know what the fuck I'm feeling? 

"Please, don't" I beg him and he shakes his head, reaching up to my lips and leaving a small peck against it, his hand slowly rubbing my soft spot. "Tell me" he demands, just a small gap between our faces. "Just say whatever you feel" he says, rubbing harder. 

He leaves small kisses through my neck and ear, making me loose all the senses. How am I even supposed to speak like that? 

"I... I..." I try but nothing comes out. I feel the words coming up to me but I just don't want to say them. It's too early and I don't even know how it sounds nor feels, I've never felt this. What the fuck is this! No, I need to shut up, I won't tell him anything. I hold his face between my hands, kissing him hard, but he pushes himself away a few seconds later, rubbing harder against me, his hand now inside my panties, directly touching me. 

He leaves just one more kiss on my neck, and now he keeps staring at me, just waiting. 

"I love you" the words leave my mouth before I can stop them and it feels weird, it sounds weird, but it feels right, so right. FUCK 

okay im sad now bc feels lfkgsdnf anyways sorry for the late update i had a busy week.

GUYS!! talk to me, tell me, do you have your own characters to this story? please tell me, I'm so curious to know that, just comment it! :) ♥