Irkens Cant Love (Zim x reader)

23. Slowing to squishing speed!

Mars was approaching the planet and it was clearly causing a fuss. Even when you couldnt see the humans scurrying around or hear the screaming, there was no doubt that the planet was on full scale panic mode. It's not like Nasaplace wouldn't be able to ignore something this large hurling towards earth. However, it was also a fact that the many humans on earth were ignorant and brainless.

I glanced at the pilot chair, only to see a change in position. Gir was now steering the planet towards earth eagerly as Zim relaxed behind him, laying back and munching on a sandwich. Where did he get that? Does he just carry sandwiches everywhere?

It was amusing though, so I let it go.

I noticed the size of the earth increasing as mars itself sped up. Whoever got the bright idea of turning mars into a space vessel was both a genius and terrifying. Watching the earth get closer seemed to spark the realisation that mars was truly a powerful weapon. Fying into a planet at full speed could surely wipe it out easily. Zim just seemed to be disregarding it.

How could someone so smart be so dumb?

I looked towards him once again. Him and Gir now in opposite positions. The irken now piloting whilst the little robot was eating a sandwich. Whether or not it was the same sandwich, I couldnt stop wondering about how they did this stuff without me noticing.

As the planet closed in, an orange ring of fire began to form. Zim and Girs hysterical laughter began once more as the flames surrounded them. I ducked behind the chair to avoid the flames, completely freaked out over the heat. My companions were unphased.

"Now, Slowing to squashing speed!" yelled Zim, flames now vanishing and allowing for me to stand behind him in silent observation.

Mars started to slow down significantly, rotating a little before landing on earth. We were sat there for a while and clearly nothing was going to happen. All I could hear was the faint chewing sounds that Gir released when eating the wiener that Gir was cooking in the atmosphere. I decided to stop questioning after Zim and his assistant switched positions.

"....Zim, I dont think-"

I was cut off by the vessel spiralling out of control. Grunting in shock, I attempted to see what had hit us. Was that mercury?

"Not while I'm around, Zim! Don't tell me you actually thought you'd WIN this!"

Oh and Dib's piloting it.

OH MY GOD DIB'S PILOTING MERCURY!

that must be the other planet that hologram talked about earlier. The one that they tested this technology on.

But that's why Dib is at a disadvantage. His planet was a test, nothing more, and Zim is piloting the completed version!

"Oh, you horrible interfering Dib!" Yelled Zim in, very loud, accusation and taking full control of mars again.

"Taste the mighty doom of my moons!" He yelled once more, pushing buttons on the mars panel in front of him.

".....Zim-" I started, about to say something before I was cut of by his waving hand, dismissively.

Two large claws had extended from the red planet, gripping onto the moons and hurling them at Dib like slingshots. Well, we needed a weapon that could rival the size of his head anyway. I suppose it's close enough. I mean, it's not like you can throw Zims ego.

Mercury travels around the back of earth, but Zim decides not to follow. It didnt help, as Dib had sent his planet charging into ours before almost crushing us and chasing us towards the sun.

The planets weave between eachother as Zim and Dib continue to have one of their usual arguments.

"You shouldn't have interfered with a superior force, Dib." Zim started, whilst I began to send Dib rude hand gestures in retaliation. "You'd have been better off just staying on your planet and getting squished just like everybody else!"