train wreck // justin foley

51

i woke up because analeia had woken up. when i looked at the time, it was 7 in the morning.

"go get ready, i've got her." justin said, beside me.

"are you sure?" i asked.

"yeah, and then we're gonna go hang out with uncle clay because mommy takes forever to get ready." justin said, talking to ana.

"mommy does not. your daddy on the other hand..." i whispered to the baby, then kissing justin. "milk's in the fridge downstairs."

"alright." he said, smiling. i grabbed my things and walked to the bathroom.

when i was finished, i did what i did every day and handed the baby to lanie. when i did, i got a call from an unknown number.

"hello?" i asked.

"hi, is this kylie andrews?" someone on the other line asked.

"yes, i am, why?" i asked.

"well we found your number in a book that belonged to annabelle ramirez-andrews, your mother, that had this number. are you available to talk for a moment?" the person asked.

"what is this? what's going on?" i asked.

"we regret to inform you that your mother has died. do you have any requests as of what you would like to do with her body?" the warden asked.

"listen, i don't know what she wrote in her journal, but i don't consider that woman my mother. do whatever you want with her. i don't care." i said, hanging up the phone. "justin!" i shouted, walking out. matt walked out after me.

"kylie, what's wrong?" matt asked.

"justin gave her my phone number!" i exclaimed as justin walked out of the outhouse. matt was holding me back from going crazy on justin.

"what's happening?" justin asked.

"you gave my fucking mom my phone number?" i asked.

"it was so long ago, kylie. i didn't think she'd do anything with it." justin told me.

"kylie, calm down and tell us what's wrong!" lanie said, walking out with my sleeping daughter.

"they called me and told me that my mom is dead." i replied to lanie. then i turned to justin. "but i don't give a fuck about that; i wanna know why you gave her my phone number when i told you the first time you did this that i wanted nothing to do with her!" i exclaimed.

"she deserved to know you, kylie." justin replied. "you're her daughter."

"she deserved nothing! if anything, she deserved to die! she wasn't remorseful about what she did, because if she was, she would have written me when she knew i lived with monty's family!" i shouted. "she never gave a fuck about me! i looked good to a judge for her. i was gonna be used by her in that stupid plea bargain when she was going to get out of prison. i don't have any love for her. you should have fucking respected that, justin." i said, walking away, grabbing my stuff, and walking out to school.

a few hours later, after ignoring every call and text from justin, clay walked up to me in the library and sat down.

"hey, clay." i said, working on my homework.

"hey, ky." clay said, fiddling with his fingers.

"can i help you?" i asked.

"did, uh, did mrs. baker text you?" clay asked.

"yeah, she texted me. said she wanted to check in and see how i was doing or whatever." i replied.

"and how is she doing?" clay asked me.

"fine, i guess." i answered.

"did she mention me at all?" clay asked.

"a little bit."

"what'd she say?"

"i don't know. she asked how you were doing." i told him.

"did she ask about bryce?" clay asked.

"she very specifically did not mention bryce, and i very much appreciated that." i replied.

"what'd you talk about?" clay asked.

"well, a lot of things. new york, how the baby was, and that they had found a buyer for the house and that she was taking care of personal business." i replied.

"did she say what other business?" he asked.

"she didn't and i didn't ask."

"and what'd she say about me?" clay asked.

"she just asked if you were okay." i replied. "you could just reach out to her, y'know.

"yeah. i'm seeing her soon."

"okay, then why don't you just, like, ask her yourself?" i asked.

"yeah." he said, getting up. "will you tell justin that i'll be getting home late tonight?"

"we're not speaking." i said, sadly.

"what's wrong? weren't you guys talking this morning?" clay asked, sitting back down.

"yeah, but we just got into a fight after you took off." i said to him. he sat back down.

"what?" he asked. "what happened?" he asked.

"we fought about my mom." i said to him. "the prison called me and when i asked justin how they got my number he said he had given it to her when he went to see her." i said, looking down.

"w-why did the prison call you?" clay asked.

"they called to tell me that my mom died." i replied.

"for some reason, it seems like you're more upset about your argument than you are about your mom dying." clay said to me.

"she went to prison when i was six. i have no emotional ties to her." i replied. "her dying has had no effect on me whatsoever."

"so you don't care that your mom died?" clay asked.

"no." i said to him. "even from inside, she's fucking with my life."

"what did she die of?" clay asked.

"i guess someone stabbed her over and over with a shiv because she mouthed off, i don't know but i also don't fucking care." i replied. "i just hate that he did this shit again." i told clay. "i'll tell him for you, though." i said. he smiled, got up, and walked out.

just then, justin walked into the library, coming toward me, sitting where clay was only three seconds ago.

"i'm trying to do homework and you're distracting me. what do you want?" i asked, not looking at him.

"can we talk somewhere private?" he asked me. i put my pen down and looked at him.

"let's go talk then, justin." i said, gathering my things and walking out with him. we went to the same storage closet that we went into after i blew up on monty after jeff had died.

"what?" i asked, sitting down.

"i'm sorry." he said to me. "i really am."

"what for this time?" i asked.

"you don't have to be rude, kylie. i'm trying to apologize." he said to me.

"like you do every single week?" i asked. "i'm tired of it, j. i'm tired, i'm exhausted. more so because i'm up with my daughter all night instead of sleeping." i replied. "so what is it that you're apologizing for?" i asked.

"first off, she's our daughter. second off, i'm sorry for giving your mom your number. i should've respected your boundaries." he said to me. "and i'm sorry for doing something else every week that has me apologizing."

i looked at him and tears rolled down my face.

"what's wrong, ky? did i do something wrong?" he asked me, holding the sides of my arms.

"my parents are dead." i said, beginning to sob into his arms. "my parents are both gone."

"you'll be okay. just let it out. you're gonna be fine." he told me, holding me. he kissed the top of my head and held me as i sobbed.