•I'll be giving positive and negative opinions. How you respond to the feedback is up to you.•
(Sorry for any delays) :)
✰ Author: cupofsass
✰ Book Name: From The Oceans
✰ Score: 23
✰ Cover:
The cover is simple and very pretty. It led really well, attracts the eye of the reader and links to the title of the story. I also think the font goes well with image. (5/5)
✰ Blurb/Summary:
The blurb is great and definitely got me intrigued. I love the caption/quote at the start as it makes the story sound special and almost mystical. The last sentence does feel like it's just been plonked on though. (5/5)
✰ Writing Style:
I really liked how you began the first chapter with the action as it immediately got me thinking what the hell the character was doing. I was definitely compelled and intrigued to read on, but I would like to see more interesting starters for more chapters. Perhaps start with a rhetorical question or with action. You successfully used metaphors and personification in your descriptions to create a more realistic imagery.
I feel like you could add more sophisticated and exciting vocabulary into your writing to make it even better. Also, try starting sentences different, perhaps with adjectives or one word sentences. Make your writing unique.
Your speech is quite good as you don't add unnecessary information; it's short and interesting. Subsequently, your chapter lengths are good, perhaps a bit short sometimes but it's not boring. (7/10)
✰ SPAG
There were grammar errors, you especially need to check through the use of commas in complex sentences and by connectives. Punctuation needs to be used more e.g. semi colons, colons and hyphens. (3/5)
✰ Characters/Plot:
The characters had their own personalities and I could distinguish them from their speech. I would like to see more descriptions on character emotions though. The plot was not so exciting and peculiar, maybe add more unexpected twist. (3/5)
✰ Recap
I would suggest you edit though your work for any errors. Then try to include more ambitious vocabulary into your work- substitute simple words for better synonyms. Also try starting your chapters with more of a cliff hanger. Your writing is good but can be more exciting.
~Thanks
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