(32)

52 11 2
                                    

•I'll be giving positive and negative opinions. How you respond to the feedback is up to you.•

✰ Author: caCrisostomo
✰ Book Name: In Between The Lines
✰ Score: 27

Cover:
The cover is interesting and suits the title very well. Good job. (5/5)

Blurb/Summary:
Again I liked the summary. I wouldn't change it as it definitely hooked me into the story. (5/5)

Writing Style:
I loved how the first chapter was written its like  a backstory of the characters. You used a lot of descriptive language and it was just amazing to read.
I did think that later on in chapters some speech became a bit too long, this may be different for others but I like reading less speech. Perhaps you could include both direct and indirect speech.
You started your chapters with great hooks which is what I always look for in good books.
Another positive is that you don't just write long boring sentences or short distasteful sentences unseated you vary between the two to effectively create suspense and excitement.
I would suggest that you start sentences with adverbs and adjectives so it's even more interesting.
Other than that, there's not much to work on for you. However, everyone can improve (including me).
I'd say since you're so good at language techniques try structural techniques.
Perhaps something like using cyclical structure. (8/10)

SPAG
There were minor spelling errors. Punctuation was used well but can be used even more. Include colons, semi colons, hyphens .... (4/5)

Characters/Plot:
The characters have been uniquely created. You don't go over the top with the writer's life and all of it feels real- to some degree. I can understand and imagine the characters and their feelings quite well. The story line is amazing considering I've never read anything like it. (5/5)

Recap
Personally, I would prefer shorter chapters however I suppose that is up to you. You are a great writer just try to go that extra mile....
Lovely story, I'd love to see more from you.

~Thanks
❁ Comment & Vote

HM's CritiquesWhere stories live. Discover now