Spring Forward, Fall Back (Alucard x Chubby! Reader)

Chapter 2 - Arrival and Mistrust

Alucard P.O.V.

I couldn't even begin to prepare dinner this evening. I just didn't have the will to eat, and that scared me. Once vampires begin to starve themselves they begin a countdown to either overindulgence or annihilation. Neither one of those options sounded good to me. I don't want to be violent or vindictive, but my depression and loneliness are beginning to eat me alive. I can feel myself slipping into oblivion with my own mind becoming my enemy.

The dreams were destroying my sleep, my good nature beginning to deteriorate, and the things that I believed to be interesting to me are suddenly becoming so....useless. Unwanted. Forgotten. I still hoped for my friends, the friends that haven't betrayed me, would come to save what little of my mind was left in time for me to return to what I was before, but my hopes for that to happen were slowly being eaten away by my memories of the ones who betrayed me. At this point in time, I'm sure that if another human were to stumble across my path, I would gladly drink their blood and leave them to rot outside my home with the other two.

I tried to do things to fill my day, anything that would distract my maddening mind from its course. I tried reading from the extensive library that both my home and the Belmont hold had to offer only to find that I really didn't like reading. I mean seriously didn't like it. If I had a choice between reading and pulling out my toenails one by one with my fingers, I would take the latter of the two options and shout with pride.

I practiced with my sword for a little while before it reminded me of the two betrayers I had perched on spikes outside my home. It made me angry to know that they used me for their own ends, but it hurt even more that I didn't realize it until after the fact. At least when I was with Trevor and Sypha, neither of them made themselves to be anything other than what they are. Granted I could have done without Trevor in the beginning, actually there are times where I'd have been happy to be without him even after I got to know him, but they both turned out to be good friends that I hope that I can rely on once again soon. I knew that as much as I didn't trust the betrayers, I could easily trust them.

Sitting under a tree just outside of the castle, I could watch the wind going through the leaves as the sun ran toward the horizon to signal the end of another day. Yet another day of loneliness that I'm barely making through. I decided that I'd follow some silly thing that my mother once said when I was a child.

~Flashback~

"Adrian?" I could hear her calling from my playroom from the hall. "Adrian, sweetheart. Come here."

I ran down the hall happily and walked into my room. "Yes mother?"

"Come here to the window," she said with a smile. When I moved up to her side, she reached over and pulled me into her lap where she peppered my face with kisses until I giggled and begged her to stop.

"Now, Adrian, look up there," she said. I followed her finger to see a bright star shining even through the light of the fading sunlight. "That is the evening star. If you see it before the light dies, you can make a wish on it for something important to you. It can't be something silly like an extra sweet or to not have to eat your vegetables."

I said, "I promise you, mommy. I will only wish for something important."

She wrapped her arms around me, held me close and kissed the top of my head.

~End of Flashback~

So, here I sit, making a wish on that evening star for something that could be the most important thing to me and my sanity.