You wouldn't care if i explained

A loss of friends

i'm not going as far as them
but i know everyone will still talk to them more
they will be remembered and missed
and i'll fade and be forgotten by every "friend"
they'll all remember them
remember their crazy memories
but forget what my face looks like
i know it's best
there's no turning back now
but there's something about my biggest fear
of being forgotten
coming true from my own decisions
that makes me wonder if this is still the best idea
they'll still have our friends
and i know they'll make more friends there
but what if i struggle to make friends?
and what if my friends now forget about me
it seems they already have
everyone talks about them moving
no one talks about me leaving
looks like i'm already forgotten
but who needs people you love to feel the same way?
who needs having friends that care about you?
that understand how you feel and will reach out
even if you don't go to them first
looks like i'm at a loss of friends
but i've always been alone anyways