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Selena's POV:
After I went home the next morning, I had practically sprinted upstairs. The sleepover broke up pretty quick as I left almost immediately after I woke up. Emotions were running wild through me. Until yesterday, my bucket list had been put out of my mind for so long I almost forgot. It wasn't that I meant to do the stuff on it and forgot; I had so desperately wanted to forget everything that had happened so I hid it away. It was full of memories- horrible ones- that I never want to think about again. So why did I suddenly want to see it? I already thought I knew the answer to that question but I was still unsure. What is the point? Can I even do any of this stuff? I don't even remember everything I put on it but as much as I want to say I've moved on.. I haven't. I want nothing more than to feel free and wild and do everything I've always dreamed of, no matter how crazy. I couldn't take it anymore; I yanked open my drawer and pulled out a small green box. I felt around for the key. I hadn't opened this thing for ages so I had kind of forgotten where it was. When I found it, my hands wouldn't stop shaking. I pushed it into the keyhole and turned. Inside was a small light green coloured paper. My bucket list. I stood for ages just staring at it. Should I open it? In the end, pure recklessness took over and I unfolded the tiny piece of paper.
MY BUCKET LIST 1. Dye the ends of my hair and a lock or two, blue. 2. Hire agents and tell them to follow each other. 3. Pull a high school prank. 4. Learn how to drive a motorcycle. 5. Go to a real, wild party. 6. Throw a party while my parents are away. 7. Go laser-tagging. 8. Cover someone's car in posters. 9. Make volcanoes in a store. 10. Ditch school for a day. 11. Pour a drink over someone's head. 12. Have an accidental paint fight. 13. Go to a drive-in movie. 14. Go to a carnival and win something. 15. Learn how to Hotwire a car. 16. Go to a real rock concert. 17. Watch the sunset from the top of a hill. 18. Have a movie marathon. (With Renee, Marie, Jason, Dylan and Justin) 19. Play ding, dong, ditch. 20. Redecorate my room. 21. Be in a band. 22. Sneak out of the house at midnight.
I glanced briefly at the paper before realising I had already done something on it. I highlighted number 18 and added names on the side. I wasn't over the list yet. I didn't know if I ever would be. I sighed. Maybe I could do this. One of these days. - I felt my eyes flutter open and I sat up and stretched my arms out. I glanced vaguely at my watch and groaned. 7:30AM. Just great. Who the hell is up this early on a Saturday? I must have some weird subconscious reason to wake up. Not. Well, I'm awake now. What's a girl to do? I dragged my feet towards the bathroom to take a shower. The cold water was refreshing when it hit my body. It didn't take long and in no time at all, I had finished my shower and wrapped a towel around my body. I put on my clothes and went back into my room. What's missing? I asked myself. Oh, right. Music. I put my iPod in the speakers and turned up the volume. It's my standard routine. Whether I wake up at noon or 5am, the music always has to go on. It's like some kind of weird addiction. Luckily, my room is soundproof. I let myself be lost in the beautiful world of Avril Lavigne. "Let 'em know that we're still rock n' roll. I don't care about my make-up, I like it better when my jeans are ripped up, don't know how to keep my mouth shut, you say So-" I sang without a care. "Whatcha' doing?" a voice said. I turned to see Justin sitting on my windowsill and almost fell over in shock. Two things; one, how the hell did he get here? and two, why the hell was he here? "Justin, what are you doing here?" I hissed. "Love you too, sunshine." I scoffed. "Just answer the question!" I protested. "I'm here to see you. What does it look like I'm doing?" He said, like it was a perfectly normal thing to show up by surprise on someone's windowsill. Where does he get his morals from? From now on I'm bolting my window before I go to sleep. "Scaring the shi-rainbows out of me." I said. "Why do you do that?" he asked. Do what?" I questioned. "Stop yourself from swearing." he said. "Well, I've been taught it's rude to swear." I replied. "Yeah but there's no one here." he questioned. "You're here." I pointed out. He smirked. "Trying to be ladylike in front of me, Sel?" he said, smirking. "Don't flatter yourself." I said, rolling my eyes. "So, what was going on when I arrived?" he said. "Um.. nothing?" He gave me a flat look. "You were singing." he said. "So?" I asked, defensively. "No need to be defensive, you should do it more often. You actually weren't half bad." I blushed. "Thanks." I said. "No problem. So, Avril Lavigne?" he asked, smirking. "Yeah, what about her?" I said. "Just didn't take you for an Avril Lavigne type of girl." I snorted. "What kind of girl did you take me for then, Bieber?" I asked. "A Taylor Swift, love song one." I laughed. "I do like her but Avril Lavigne is my favourite singer." He looked thoughtful for a moment. Then he spoke. "So, the whole good girl thing? Is it just a cover?" he said. "What do you mean?" I questioned. "I mean, is that the real you?" I was confused. "I still don't get it." I said. "Avril Lavigne is a spunky type of singer. You know, break the rules and all the shit. You.. don't seem like that but at the same time, I don't think that you're as perfect as you make out to be." he said. "Nobody is perfect, Justin." I stated. "I know but.. you get what I mean." he said. "I guess," I shrugged. "I mean, I've been a good girl for as long as I remember." I said. "For you? or for others?" he asked. "What?" I asked, confused. "When you took up the role of being a good girl; was it for you? Or did you do it for other people?" That made me think. I pretty much always used to think what I was doing was for the best and maybe it was. I mean, with university and everything, it's always good to have a respectable reputation; but now that I think about it, do I really want this? "For both I guess." I answered finally. "I mean with uni.. it's good, but I guess it's just boring, you know?" I admitted. "Have you ever thought of doing something rebellious, you know, spontaneous?" he asked. "I guess I have but then again, I never did anything about it." I admitted. "Well then get ready." Justin said. "For what?" I questioned. "We're going to a party tonight." I shook my head. "No." I said. Yes." he said. "No." I said. "Yes." he said. "No." I said. "Why not?" he asked. "My parents won't let me." I admitted. "So? Sneak out." he offered. "I can't do that!" I said. "Yes, you can. I'll help you." he said. "But-" I started, but got cut off. "Be ready around midnight." Before I had time to protest, he jumped out the window sill. I sighed. I wasn't getting out of this anytime soon. It's not like Justin would let me but it was kind of stupid of me to tell him that I had thought about doing something spontaneous. Well, looks like I'm going to a party.
