Medley

17: AGAIN.

Oh, no! What have I done?!

I'm in the arms of a man I barely know anything about.

He's holding me tight, my face pressed to his chest and his head resting on my shoulder.

We're still, quiet. It's a long way down from the clouds.

My brain keeps telling me I have to run.
My heart won't let me move an inch away from him.

Oh, Emilia! What have you done?!

I thought once we both got what we wanted I could get over it and move on. Carry on with my mundane life, taking nothing from this but a nice memory.

Oh boy, was I wrong!
Now that I've tasted him, I want more.
I've had some, now I want it all.

"Guess it's true, I'm not good
At a one-night stand..."

Shush, Sam Smith!

"Are you okay?" Harry breaks the silence but doesn't disturb the peace of our embrace.

"I'm more than okay." I'm tempted to stay in his arms for as long as he'd hold me, but I need to see his face so I unwrap my arms from around him and pull away. His eyes are brighter and his lips are pinker and he's beautiful even with his hair all messy and sweat streaming down his forehead. "How are you?"

"I'm ready for us to go to my hotel room."

Oh, hell no! I can't do that! I can't leave this place with him. The more I get from him the more I'll want. If we go to his room for a second round, I lose. By knockout.

"I'd love to, Harry. But I have to go."

I don't waste time and slide off the table to get away from him before my resolve is compromised by those goddamn deep green eyes looking intently at me with a lost kitten expression. I can't give in!

Within a minute I'm fully dressed and heading for the couch to collect my purse. Didn't take me long given that only my panties and my top made it off my body. But before I can pick up my bag his hand grabs my arm firmly but gently and forces me to sit down.

"Why are you leaving? I was under the impression you were having a great time just like I was. Am I reading you wrong?"

"No, I've had a wonderful time, believe me. But I can't... I don't want... I just think it'll be easier if we leave it at this." His interpretation of my 'goodnight' yesterday comes to mind when I try to decide how to end this moment. "Goodbye, Harry."

I get up once more and sprint for the door, Harry follows me there reaching the door quicker than me and leaning against it so I can't open it. He stretches his arm out and holds his hand open in front of me.

"Give me your keys." It's an order, not a request.

His face is dead serious. But I detect a shadow of a smile starting to form in the corner of his mouth.

"Why would I do that?"

"Because I'm trying to make your life easier."

"That would take an awful lot of work!" I respond sarcastically.

"Let's start simple. Hand me the car keys." I fish for the keys in my bag and place them on his palm. Harry takes them and opens the door but when he sees that I'm right behind him when we get out into the corridor he signals for me to wait there. I have no idea what he's trying to do but the playful expression on his face is too precious to not do as I'm told.

He walks down the hallway to the next door over and goes inside the room. Only a minute later two men emerge from inside: Harry and the taller, blonde guy in blue jeans and black t-shirt from earlier. Grumpy Blondie, one of his security guards I assume, walks down the hallway away from us with the car keys jiggling in his hand while Harry returns to my side.

"What is he doing?" I'm trying hard not to sound as amused as I in fact am by his antics.

"Buying me more time with you." He flashes his most charming smile at me and with his hand placed on his waist he gestures for me to lock my arm in his so we can walk together.

Once out on the sidewalk I understand why Harry never asked for a description of the car. The parking lot is completely empty, mine is the only car left. I assume venue employees and the band's staff must have their own parking lot around the corner somewhere. Or maybe we are just the last ones out.

The distance from where we stand to where the car is parked is long enough to give us some time to say a better goodbye before Harry's guy drives my car all the way up here. He was only a few steps ahead of us.

"Um, I'm going to be in town until tomorrow night. Is there any way I can convince you to come visit me at the hotel?"

Yes, there is. That was it. I'm in!

...I'm glad he can't read my mind.

This is not how it was supposed to go. This was all we could have. Why is he offering more? And what if I keep wanting more after that?

I look him in the eyes and smile but I don't respond just yet because I'm thinking very carefully what I'm going to say.

"I would love to take you out for coffee or lunch, but I'm sure you'd understand how going out in public is not always a good idea in my case." Harry realizes that convincing me might take something more than simply asking.

It's sad to even think how hard it must be for him to do something as normal as buying a cup of coffee or go to lunch without being mobbed by fans on the street or even by curious people who recognize him.

"I can see how that may not be such a good idea." I'm still not giving anything away. The moment he realizes I'm fighting an internal war over how to respond to his proposal, I'm done.

"But there's a restaurant at the hotel so we can still have lunch and enjoy some peace and quiet. No one knows where I'm staying so it will be fine.

"Why?" This question is better than the 'no' I had at the tip of my tongue before I spoke.

"Why not?" He's always responding so quickly, it gives me no time to prepare myself for the next step.

I want to tell him I don't see what the point of this is. I'm going to be another one in a most likely long list of women who surrender themselves to his feet only to have their names forgotten by the time he moves on to a new city and meets a new girl.

"I'll think about it."

Who the hell am I kidding here?
Oh, right! Myself.

The car approaching distracts us from our conversation and he doesn't get a chance to reply. The blonde giant parks the car as Harry steps in front of me blocking my view of him. At that moment he gets closer and with one hand he tilts my head by pushing my chin up, he stares for a brief instant and bites on his bottom lip. The memory of those lips on mine could make me lose my balance if I spend another second thinking about it.

I'm incredibly displeased when he lowers his face to level with mine and plants, in slow motion, a very small kiss on my cheek. Simultaneously, Mr. Grumpy guy gets out of the car and walks around it towards me and returns the cars keys adding a "Goodnight, Miss" before going back inside the building. He stays close to the glass doors looking out still keeping an eye on Harry. I guess that's what a security guard is for... not for fetching cars for his client's conquest of the night.

This would be a scene out of a romantic drama if I got in the car and turned the radio on to find Lenny Kravitz singing Again.

Real life SO needs background music!

"I've been searching for you
I heard a cry within my soul
I've never had a yearning
Quite like this before
Now that you are walking
Right through my door

All of my life, where have you been?
I wonder if I'll ever see you again"

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AGAIN - Lenny Kravitz.