Heal // z.m

twelve | chemo's & soft touches

Zayn

It was Monday today, meaning I was getting my very, first, chemotherapy session. My family had stayed over, so they could be here for me today, which I was very grateful for. They were already dressed but I had woken up only half an hour ago, so I had just gotten ready.

Once I was washed up, teeth brushed and my clothes on, I sat down on my bed and felt how mum stuffed something in my hand. Opening it, I saw my favourite, small, chocolate bar.

I gulped, "Mum, you're spoiling me way too much." I couldn't help but laugh, slowly opening the packaging.

My mum stroked my hair, "You might get nauseous because of it after your chemotherapy so.. you better eat it now."

Kissing her cheek, I stared at her for a while, a smile on my face. "Thanks, mum." I took a bite of the chocolate and closed my eyes at the taste of it, sighing in content. I didn't know why but it was just so good. My sister hated the structure of crunch and smooth filling, I couldn't understand why.

When I opened my eyes, I noticed my mother staring at me. It made me chuckle, "What are you looking at?"

"You." She replied, a small smile visible.

"Why?" I took another bite and slowly chew on it while looking at my dad and sister, who had to go to the toilet, as usual. My young sister couldn't ever hold it, which had intruded a lot of family days out.

My mum sighed, but she was still smiling. "I just like how you're enjoying your food. You're adorable."

"Mum." I groaned, though, a chuckle left my mouth. "I'm twenty one."

"I don't care. You're still adorable." She grinned and grabbed the empty package out of my hand, stuffing it in her purse. I shook my head and looked up when Caroline, my dad and Safaa and Doctor Lane came into the room at the same time.

Swallowing thickly, I knew this was the moment it would all happen. I couldn't help but feel nervous.

Doctor Lane spoke up, "Good morning Zayn. Did you sleep well?"

I nodded, "Yeah. Thanks."

"That's great. Alright, my colleague- Doctor Martins- will come soon. He'll bring the infusion for the chemotherapy with him, which will be standing next to your bed. If your family can take a seat?" He smiled at my dad and Safaa. My dad sat down next to my mother and pulled Safaa on his lap.

She only had eyes for her stuffed horse at the moment, which made me feel relieved. I didn't know how she was going to take it. She knew I was sick, but she was too young to understand the concern of it. Which was probably better, anyway.

Eventually, after a few minutes another Doctor came into the room. He walked over to me and shook my hand. "I'm Doctor Martins and I'll be giving you the chemotherapy today." He was wearing a cap to cover his mouth and he was wearing medical gloves, making me feel like I was a toxic person, though, obviously I knew it was the toxic chemo.

"I'm Zayn." I nodded, not really knowing what to say and I watched him as he introduced himself to my mum, dad and Safaa.

I watched him as he rolled the infusion into my room, placing it next to my bed. There was a small bag hanging up high, which was for my medication, so he said. A lot of tubes were connected to the infusion, some of them needing to be connected to my veins soon, and I observed the whole thing for a while.

"Alright, so what we're going to do is bring a thin needle into one of your veins and it will stay there until the session is done. We're going to attach it to your skin with band aids and the needle will be attached to one of the tubes, which brings the chemo, so the medication into your blood." The doctor explained, to which I nodded.