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"So how does it feel, love?" Catherine hummed as she sipped on her wine with a raised pinky while she looked across the round table at Louis who was ghosting smoke from his lips while a lit cig rested between his fingers.
The two decided to meet up and go to a different place that had more of a lounge-vibe to it. The music was soft and the lights were dimmed low which was perfect since Louis didn't want to be in a space where he could be seen.
"At first it bothered me but now it kind of feels good." The smaller man replied, thinking back to two weeks ago when him and Harry were going back and forth in the apartment. "We fight a lot though."
"What a shame." She sighed, setting her drink down and glancing at their surroundings. "Is it different now? Like, do you feel different towards the relationship?" She asked softly, her faded jade orbs making eye contact with vibrant blues.
"I-" Louis paused, not wanting to actually say it out loud because then it could be true. He has been feeling this way for a few days lately and the words -despite how careless he was feeling- were actually deep.
She motioned with her hand for him to continue, pushing back the wayward strands of hair that rested on her shoulder to brush flawlessly against her back. This woman was actual perfection to be honest. But thats because she has the ability to make herself be.
"I actually want to take a break from him." He admitted, biting on his bottom lip as he stared at the table. "It feels great not having to care about him as much as I did before. Im getting used to being on my own since he's always away. Probably trying to figure out how to change me back."
"I think you should." She smirked, tapping her manicured nails against the table because everything was going perfectly. It was exactly the way that she wanted it to be. "When are you going to tell him? Today?"
The feather-haired boy didn't feel the need to do it as soon as possible but now that the idea was in his head...it couldn't leave.
How would he even do it? This would be the third time that they break up and this time seemed more real than the previous. Well what could be more real than needing space from your boyfriend who you just found out is a murderer? Or when he tries to kill you?
"Maybe. I just have to think about it."
"The sooner you do it the more free you'll feel." She said rather quickly when she saw the look of hesitation on his face. She composed herself when she saw the raise of his eyebrow.
It confused Louis as to why she wanted it so bad but just shrugged it off since he was too busy finding out a way to word how he was feeling.
"I don't know." The man whispered, taking a last pull from his cigarette before squishing the burnt out end in the ashtray that contained multiple cig ends.
>>
"Harry..." Louis whispered as he sat on the couch with his knees pulled to his chest. He rested his cheek against his knee as he watched the red eyed man sat in the recliner beside him text away on his phone.
"What." The man mumbled, biting on his tongue as he replied to Anne's text before going back to Zayn's message.
"I-I want to talk."
"About?"
"Us."
Harry looked up from his phone nervously, setting it down on the coffee table so he could give the man his full attention. He could already see by the dull tint in his eyes that it wasn't going to be good. And he couldn't deal with another bad thing.
Louis swallowed dryly, setting his legs down so his feet connected with the cold floor before he opened his mouth, "I think that we should-"
"Listen." Harry intervened, tangling his hands in his hair as he kept his gaze forced on Louis. "I know i'm the worst when it comes to affection. But i love you, Louis. This is just one of the many bumps in our relationship and just being with you now -even if you don't love me- is enough. I cant lose you. You mean everything to me."
Louis winced as he saw the small flicker of a tear in his eye, making his heart ache since he could see how painful it was for him.
The man he loved couldn't love him.
"I want to love you. So much. But I just cant. Being this way actually opens my eyes to things. Makes me want to focus on myself." He said, his voice growing softer with each and every word.
Harry clenched his jaw at that, his gaze now falling to the ground as he nodded. He wasn't going to stop him. He wanted to, desperately, but if this is what he wanted. Then he wouldn't stand in his way.
"Say something." Louis muttered, hating the glisten of tears in his eyes while his expression was cold.
"Okay." Harry's deep voice hummed as he raised his gaze to meet cold grey orbs. His shaking hands rubbed at his clenched jaw, wiping at his tears aggressively. He took a deep breath before rubbing his sweaty palms against his jean-clad thighs.
Louis' breath caught in his throat as they continued to stare into each other's eyes. Was this it? What did he mean by okay? Okay what?
"Okay, what?" He dared to ask, his voice sounding soft as he watched the tears that bunched at his water line disappear. He could physically see that the man was fixing himself. Making himself cold.
His gaze was cold and his red orbs were absolutely Deadly as he clenched and unclenched his jaw. It hurt to say it but he had to. This is what Louis wanted. So this is what he will get.
