Ecstasy

Purgatory

"There is no timestamp on trauma. There isn't a formula that you can insert yourself into to get from horror to healed. Be patient. Take up space. Let your journey be the balm."

- Excerpt from Dawn Serra

I finish my last bite of the fruit salad which is delicious especially because V makes it and she has a special touch to food.

I'm glad I'm eating all my comfort food, however I want some more.

I grab my bowl and move my chair back to get out of it when my elbow hits something and it goes crashing to the floor.

I look down and I see my glass, now broken, with sparkling cider surrounding it.

Oh no.

I look up from the floor and briefly glance at Lorenzo who has an annoyed look plastered on his face.

He's annoyed because I dropped it. In a couple of seconds that annoyance will become anger and men aren't nice when they're angry.

I place the bowl down, going down on my hands and knees and begin gathering the glass shards as quickly as possible.

Only ten seconds.

"Brielle, stop," Violet says, bending down to my level, "You're going to hurt yourself."

9.

I ignore her completely. I don't care about the pain in my hands, I just don't want to get in trouble for being a klutz.

"I'm fine," I whisper to her and she grabs my wrists trying to get me to stop but I continue.

6.

"I'm fine," I reassured her. I pick up the big piece of glass shards but I still notice the tiny ones still glistening on the tile floor.

3.

I get up and put the shards in the trash can. I look around but I can't find the broom in the kitchen.

"I need a broom," I mumble. I don't know what number I'm on now because I lost count.

"Brielle, what are you doing? You're hurting yourself," Lorenzo says, gripping my arms firmly and I finally look up to him, my vision now beginning to get blurry.

I'm in so much trouble.

"I'm so sorry. I broke it and you bought it not me and I-" I ramble, trying to calm myself down but it's futile. I can't and I'm scared.

Instead of the expected anger that I'm so used to receiving, Lorenzo embraces me in his warm arms.

I wrap my arms around him as well and I sniffle, controlling my tears.

"It's fine, you made a mistake," he reassures, patting my back gently, "On sdelal tebya takoy."

I don't know what he said but I fully agree with it. Enzo pulls away from me and scans my hands and I finally look at them as well. My hands have multiple paper-like cuts. They're tiny but I bet you once I use them again it'll burn.

"I'll pick the rest up, okay Brielle?" Violet says and I nod.

Enzo grabs my wrist gently and I follow him as we go into the bathroom and he pulls out a first-aid kit. He opens it and he begins disinfecting my cuts and I wince in pain.

After he does that to all my tiny cuts, he takes a long bandage and wraps both of my hands and they're tight but not too tight where it hurts.

He holds my hand and he looks me in my eyes with love and it makes me smile without thinking.