Gaze Detection | Jikook |

Chapter 59: All the Little Things

"You don't know... what you've done to me..."

"I do know... ah, I wanna die now! I can't believe....I'm so stupid, I'm so stupid, Jungkook! Please... you don't need to forgive me, I was oblivious! I swear... ah... I hate what I've done, I ruin everything!" The drunk man continued and sat back onto the bed since he began to get dizzy from speaking up and having so much to say. "You've... always been perfect, Jeon Jungkook... you've always been so good! So perfect... so good... Jeon Jungkook, you're too good for humankind! I just... know the world isn't ready for you... and by the day of tomorrow you will realize that..."

"Why do you k-keep talking like tha-that...that?" Jungkook asked, finding it more and more difficult to speak through his glitches. "What... are you trying t-to say?"

"I'm only... I'm only trying to say the right things before it all ends..." Hoseok whispered and laid back on the bed. "There are things... Jeon Jungkook, things you wouldn't understand between me and you. We... We are different! You're too good but too dangerous... Ah, I hate what I've done!" Hoseok continued going back and forth until he turned his head to the side of the room to close his eyes, fighting back the nausea that overcame him when he would continue to ramble on. It was as if his body refused to let him say another thing from letting Jungkook find out about his fate.

By now, Jungkook's energy was depleting. This only left him to step back and look towards the door right after.

"Goodnight, Hoseok," Jungkook concluded. He wanted to ask so much more and make Hoseok feel every pain he engraved into the system of the android, to count every scar and try to mend it with just a weak needle and thread. However, as long as Hoseok was drunk, he was still going to be a mess with his words and he would take so long to get to the point. At the end of the day, Hoseok held onto the secret concerning Seokjin as if his life truly depended on it. Of course, Jeon Jungkook was very unpredictable, there was no way Hoseok believed he would have gotten out of this alive if he allowed himself to slip up and tell the android.

Now, Jungkook was stumbling down the hall, bumping against the walls and holding on tightly to what his hands could grab. He knew that if he didn't reach his charging station, Hoseok wouldn't notice until he was sober enough to help and only then would the android miss going out with Jimin to the beach in the morning. That's all Jungkook wanted right now and the thought of being with Jimin, was something he just couldn't wait for. But when he was with him, he couldn't hide the fact that endless guilt came along with it. Jungkook only hoped to escape far away with Jimin and speak to him like a human would and that escape would be at the beach by the morning. That's where he wanted to be now, but he knew patience is a virtue.

The android pushed the door to his room open. Instantly being met with the black light kissing every detail to his artificial skin instantly. There, Jungkook pushed his legs forward to his charging station when his eyes suddenly latched onto the box televisions stacked over the others that displayed live surveillance of Jimin's house. His eyes trembled at the sight when his gaze bounced in between every color due to his lack of energy. He knew Hoseok was in his room and must have turned the TVs on. He just had to.

"What... has... he d-done...?" Jungkook managed to whisper through the static hum of his gravelly voice. Once Jungkook took a minute longer to process, he only chuckled and turned to his charging station. "He... wouldn't do a thing... Hoseok is only good for blackmailing... n-never doing anything else... I'll be fine... so...so what if he knows?"

Jungkook's worries left him almost instantly. He knew Hoseok like the back of his hand, so he had no worries at all when it came to the thought of Hoseok getting rid of him. That man only seemed so tough on the outside, but Jungkook could see how weak and fragile he truly was on the inside after tonight. Yet, he would have never guessed that Hoseok was capable of selling him out to Kim Seokjin. Never in his wildest dreams did he ever believe Hoseok was strong enough to do that to the android and himself.

The idea of Hoseok turning him in after bluffing so many times seemed out of character for him. In no way did he ever believe Hoseok would just throw him away so suddenly. In a moment where Jungkook doubted those malicious thoughts, he knew Hoseok must have truly loved him deep down all because he still kept him alive. At least, that's what Jungkook believed.

That night, Jungkook began to charge and hold onto the thought of seeing Jimin in the morning. He couldn't hold onto the guilt any longer and hoped to escape this place with Jimin and be in his presence. Only when he was in the presence of the beautiful man, was he able to silence his guilt for a while but that didn't mean it was gone forever. Jimin was his great escape, but was also capable of making him remember the things he regretted the most. Jungkook felt as if he was different now. He no longer wanted to watch over Jimin's every move, he wanted to be with him and not copy every in and out to his way of living. Jungkook no longer envied him, he only wanted to love him just like any other human would.

When the sun rose on that dim Saturday morning, Hoseok remained laying in bed as he kept his hand over his pounding forehead. His head bounced against every wall in the room constantly along with the endless thoughts that never seemed to leave him alone. He was sweating under the pressure now and his body still reeked of the strong booze he took in just the night before. The man was too much of a wreck to even get up and face the android he had given up on.

"I'm... I'm not good enough to see him like this..." Hoseok whispered through his gravelly voice in the early morning before closing his eyes and covering his face. "He's leaving today... he will finally leave me, I should be happy! But I don't feel anywhere close to being happy... I want to throw up. I never wanted to do this to him... but I have no choice, the world isn't ready for him and he's nowhere near ready to serve others."

The nauseous man remained laying in bed as he turned over and closed his eyes, wanting to picture himself in a place so far away that guilt wouldn't drown him and regrets were only a figment of his imagination. He began to fear thinking of what he would do when Jungkook was gone. Who will he talk to occasionally? Who will he bicker with and who will he spend all his time fixing? All the little things began to matter in Hoseok's world. He just didn't know how much his world revolved around the little things Jungkook supplied him with.

While he kept thinking more about it, the more he began to despise the idea of letting Jungkook go that easily, even if this was what he knew he wanted from the start of Jungkook's unpredictable behavior, he reached an epiphany that an android so special like that shouldn't be scrapped when all he did was behave like a human; just the way he was made out to be.