Project You

Chapter 10

On Saturday morning i'd scrubbed his number off my arm.

On the other hand, on Friday night, i'd written his number down on a paper and kept it in my top drawer beneath some folded clothes, because even if I couldn't see it, I knew it was still in there when I did decide to call him.

Why? Because as much of a cold bitch I was, I did feel fucking bad for how I was being, but it was much too hard to break a cycle so suddenly just for his piece of mind.

I felt bad for stressing him out, someone who did nothing to me, yeah I had my own problems and was pissed at the world but Karsen himself had been nothing but nice to me.

So I kept his number at the bottom of my drawer beneath the folded clothes.

And now as I got in my car and began to drive, part of me began to hope that i'd forget about it as I made my way over to Gracie house, having done a few pages of work but I had to babysit her a little before I went my nona.

She was leaving soon. And part of me was sad, part of me didn't care, and another part was just neutral. Kids were kids, but Gracie, she was special in her own way.

She was smart, only struggling because she had no support since both her parents worked late hours, and even if they loved her well when they were around, it was still not enough.

I learnt from a young age that children needed attention even teenagers needed attention, maybe not as much as a child in first grade, but in the end, a tenth grader, like any child, wanted to know their parents cared about them enough to pay attention to them.

We all needed someone to check on us every once in a while, a check in, maybe a reassuring hug or smile or something- and if we don't have those things, we might grow to be sad, lonely... bitter.

Life was cruel that way. Because some people had no one their whole life, and yet instead of adapting to it, they still needed someone, yearned for someone, wanted someone.

But wouldn't allow for anyone to walk in, at least not easily.

I don't know how i'd driven to her house without crashing into something since my mind was wandering and even if my eyes were open, it felt like i'd been daydreaming the entire time.

I sigh softly to myself, taking the key out the ignition before I open the door beside me and get out of the car. I lock it and walk over to the front door, eyeing the driveway and I see their car, knowing her parents were probably preparing to leave and weren't out yet.

I get to the door and knock, just two simple knocks of my fist and moments later the door swings open, and when I see no one in my view, I look down.

And immediately I see Gracie.

"Hey Eva!"

I smile at the girl, tapping her head of curls that were an unruly sight but still looked cute on her as I walk around her and further into the house. "Hello."

She closes the door, locking it too and follows close behind me. "Are you tutoring me today? Its Saturday!" She says defensively, as if that would stop us from a tutoring session but thankfully it was not tutoring.

I was just gonna be babysitting her for an hour or two.

"Not tutoring-"

"Oh yay, we can watch movie!" She squeals loudly before she scrunches her nose, she starts kicking her legs as she stands in place, almost like a horse, or bull, that is before she starts sprinting towards the kitchen to probably get a packet of M&M's and popcorn for the movie.

I stare at her figure in confusion as to why she'd made a zoom sound and then I hear her mom clear my clear confusion up, "She just finished watching the Cars movies, back to back."