Chances | Dazai X Reader

Forty Seven • Is It Possible?

His reply is getting a door slammed to his face

• • •

The rest of the night is normal, nothing out of ordinary. Something tells Dazai that Mori didn't come randomly—he does that normally, but—he had a reason this time. Naturally, he assumes that it has something to do with the mission. He brushes it off, thinking that Mori will eventually talk about it, most likely in the morning. Dazai chooses not to focus on the fact that this'll be his first mission without you there after a long time.

Or, what feels like a long time.

Instead, Dazai decides to get as close to you as possible in bed. At first, he let you play with his hair for a little while, all until he turned you over so that your back was facing him and he was pressing against you, arm hanging over you in a loose hug. "Sleep," he whispers. You laugh at that, taking the hand that's wrapped around you and holding onto it, squeezing it a little. "You too."

God it's just so easy to fall asleep again. He doesn't need that insane, unhealthy amount of alcohol for him to sleep—he just needs you by his side. It is hard for him to accept the fact that he is changing, maybe getting better. He just doesn't want to lose such a big part of himself, who he basically is, built himself upon.

Really, he's still just a stupid teenager that's fallen in love. There's still things that he doesn't understand—he does not like admitting that he can be confused sometimes, let him be. The feeling overall is so new to him as well. And it may be cliche, but he never thought that he could fall in love, and now there's that possibility of someone loving him back. Which is so hard for him to wrap his own head around.

How—?

He doesn't know how someone could, but god he really wishes someone could, someone would—just so that he can prove himself wrong. Just so he can feel a little more fucking human. His whole life has just been built on him, and he's had to carry it the whole time. If he dropped it, it wouldn't end well. Which sounds like great news for someone like Dazai, someone who's craved death for a very long time, but it wasn't like that. If he dropped it now, it would be like his whole act, the whole person he's hidden himself under cracks, opens up.

That is exactly what Mori has been trying to do. Maybe, a better part of him tells him that he shouldn't, that he should leave Dazai alone for once in his goddamn life. The side that rules, reeks with power and questions? It always gets the better of him. Because what kind of person picks up a fourteen year old boy and proceeds to kill the—now old—Port Mafia's boss? The first thing that he does is show Dazai that he's in power now, that he has to obey him almost.

Dazai's always understood. He knew when to actually do what Mori asked and when he could slip away easily. In the end, they're both playing this game of chess together. As if they're sitting on this gigantic chess board on opposite sides, unleashing their pawns and playing them right. Knowing Dazai, he's already planned his steps ahead, quick on understanding Mori's body language.

No matter what, Dazai knows Mori better than Mori knows Dazai.

He's already won.

• • •

Morning hits much quicker than either one of you wanted. It felt like it had only been two hours, but it's already nine. So, Dazai gets up from the bed first. He rarely does that, he's usually the one that stays in bed and clings onto you so you won't get away from him. "Mori?" You ask him. He hums, taking out the clothes he wants to wear, "Most likely, let's get ready."

He walks over to the bed, taking one of your hands and pulling you up and off the bed. "You're an asshole for that," you mumble, rubbing your eyes as you slowly make your way to the bathroom. And Dazai almost accidentally says 'your assho--' but his own mouth—and mind—stops him because he definitely did not think that through. Blame it on the fact that he woke up a few minutes ago.

"I was gonna go first—" He pouts, standing at the doorway of the bathroom and staring at you. "Brush your teeth first," you reply, rolling your eyes as you bring him in. He sets his clothes by the sink. "Give me a kiss," he says, making little grabby hands, hoping that you would hold onto them. "Brush. First."

And he does, wiping his mouth as he hands you your towel for you to do the same. "Now?" He asks, raising an eyebrow in both hope and worry. Worried that you might throw him out of the bathroom, but you don't—a small, brief, peck of the lips and Dazai's face gets a little pinkish. He sees himself in the mirror and he instantly splashes cold water over his face, a little embarrassed. It's cute.

Then to cover that up, he decides to be a little smug asshole and subtly point at the show—

Hitting him in the head with a hair brush, he walks out of the bathroom, laughing as he holds onto the top of his head. He's still smiling when you close the door, but then his phone starts ringing—he automatically thinks it's Chuuya so his smile doesn't fade easily.

It's Mori. What a way to kill the moment.

"Yes, Boss?"

"Be in my office with [Y/N] and Chuuya by ten."

A/N: firstly, it feels really great having this book gain more attention. I appreciate the reads, comments, and support so much. also, I already have a general idea of the next chapter, so--if I don't get lazy--expect another chapter soon.