(Shattered...) Dreams Fulfilled

Broken Hearts Mended Part 1

Countless minutes had passed since they had wrapped their arms around each other and lay back on the bed, murmuring promises that brought smiles to their faces as they lovingly reached out to touch the other, caressing and kissing with a new found sense of depth and emotions certain they were on the brink of new discoveries.

Their bodies were pressed closely together, her face resting on his chest, as he continued to run his fingers through her hair in between soft tender kisses, each holding back the desire to be deeply connected and give in fully to their passion.

"Derek..."

"Uhmmm..."

"You're vibrating," she giggled.

"So I am..." he laughed, "and ignoring it."

"Don't you want to know what it is?"

"You're here with me...nothing else can be as important."

"Derek...you should look at it, something could be wrong, your Mom...Kathleen..."

"They'd call Meredith."

"Derek...look at it."

"Never remembered you being this nosy before," he teased her, "or concerned it might be my family," he added while nuzzling her neck and kissing her softly, then a gentle bite, a quiet moan her response.

"Derek...if you don't..." she said reaching for the phone, "I will."

"And bossy...I forgot bossy," he laughed handing her the phone.

"He's dead Derek...I'm...we're going to kill him."

"Mark, I take it," he smiled.

"Yes," she smiled in return and showed him the screen.

-Shep the bottle cost a fortune, hope you finally got sex

"What bottle is he talking about?"

"Derek...that is not the point, it's his sex comment," she laughed playfully.

"You know Mark, that's all he thinks about," he told her, "we should respond."

"Absolutely not..." she told him, "if we do, he'll know the answer."

"How do you figure?"

"Derek...seriously," she giggled, "you'd have looked at that message if we were having sex?"

"It doesn't mean we didn't."

"Brainless..." she teased him, "he'll know, but what bottle is he talking about?"

"It must be what the clerk meant downstairs, that something had been delivered," he said and looked around the room, "Meredith, he sent a bottle of champagne."

"He did..."

"Uhmmm...look, at the table."

"I didn't notice at all," she said, her eyes resting on the silver tray covered with linen, a silver bucket with a bottle of champagne on top of it, with two champagne flutes, linen napkins and a small glass bowl filled with ice, now turned mostly to water.

"I think we were a bit more preoccupied."

"There's a note by it Derek, why don't you get it."

"I don't want to move," he said and brought her closer to him.

"You don't have to," she said and kissed him.

"But..." he murmured against her lips, "you want to know what it says."

"Uh huh..."

"You're going to make me get out of bed."

"Well...only if you want to," she said with enough of a pout for him to tease her.

"Ok then, we can just wait till morning."

"Derek..."

"Meredith...you are definitely very nosy," he said just as he reluctantly got up, and leaned down to kiss her, "Shepherd trait rubbing off on you already," he laughed.

"That's just what your Mom said," she smiled upon his lips.

"She did not."

"You can ask her," she said so seriously, he knew he'd call her after they talked, he was confident they'd resolve their issues and his Mom's acceptance of her seemed of great importance to Meredith so he'd make sure they told her they were getting married in Venice.

"I don't have to ask her," he said kissing her lips lightly again, and walked over to pick up the bottle, "I'm sure she said it."

"You really are nosier than I am..." she smiled, as he picked up the note, "must be growing up with five women."

"We should open it...celebrate..." he said, pausing, "if you want..."

"Of course I want to celebrate..." she said, recognizing the hint of doubt.

"But..." he said, the word now taking a new lighter meaning, already by her side and handing her the note.

"You know me and drinking..."

"Uh huh...not much self control," he joked.

"We should celebrate Derek...we're getting married..." she said, emotions reflected in her eyes.

"We are," he said as he sat next to her and kissed her softly as she reached for his hand.

"And we can still talk...I mean... a few glasses of champagne...we can still talk," she added, doubts resurfacing, "please..."

"Meredith," he said...his voice broken, "I'm sorry... about tonight..."

"Derek...it's ok...we both do it, jump to conclusions... but we have to stop, tonight...we just have to stop, and I don't know how we do that."

"I was an ass," he said accepting the blame, "I told you I would not rush you."

"It's not about that, I also could have ended your misconception right away...I should have stopped you before things got so out of hand."

"Love," he said caressing her face lightly, "we both should have, we need to start learning to do this together."

"You agree...we're worth fighting for..." she asked him.

"We are..." he said.

"Derek..."

"Yes."

"We can't avoid this anymore."

"We're not..."

"Yes, we sort of are...let's just...start...at the beginning, like we said."

"The beginning...if I recall was ...is celebrating that you said yes..."

"That you asked me finally..." she smiled.

"And forgot the ring..."

"And I said yes before you even asked..."

"Yes...let's start with celebrating..." he said and got up and she followed him, and stood by him as he picked up the bottle of champagne, drying off the moisture and water that had formed while it sat unattended in the silver bucket.

"Very nice..." she said, noting the renowned label, "but I'm more familiar with their yellow."

"Uhmmm...tempted to change your drinking habits..."

"I don't think I can afford to," she laughed.

"Uhmmm...we splurged," Derek told her, as he held the bottle in his hand, ready to pop the cork, as she read the note, one side of which said Compliments of Dottore Sloan.

"Derek, he is incorrigible."

"What does it say?"

"He wrote an email Derek, and they pasted it on here," she showed him as they both read.

"Make it worth my while...all the money & effort to find this bottle in time for your engagement celebration. But, only the best would do for the two of you...your new life together. It's been said, this truly speaks of romance and passion and seduction..."

"Kind of feel guilty...that we're not..."

"We're celebrating our engagement...the first day of our lifetime together...it's worth it Meredith...and ...there will be many other times we will celebrate..."

"I love you Derek," she said simply and leaned up to kiss him.

"I love you too," he said, lightly nipping at her lips, then deepening the kiss briefly, leaving her wanting so much more, and then the familiar pop of the bottle brought magic to the night, and she held the flutes for him to fill, and when he put the bottle back in the silver ice bucket, she handed him a flute.

Time seemed to stand still as Meredith and Derek met the other's gaze, while their hands entwined voluntarily, their bodies merely inches apart, the reflection in their eyes the final acceptance of souls having found their mate, twin spirits finally joined for a lifetime and beyond.

Meredith tried to keep her voice from breaking as she spoke, her eyes never leaving his, "Once upon a time...was not part of my life growing up...but...still, part of me...as with every little girl...I believe longed for the possibility of it all...then...I found out...my life was not..."

"Meredith," he interrupted, not wanting sadness to overshadow this moment, raising his hand to cup her face and lightly caressed her cheek with the pad of his thumb.

"Let me..." she said, clearing her throat... "please..." she added as she turned her face slightly and kissed the open palm of his hand.

"Then, one day...you walked into my life..." she paused, "and made me want to believe again..."

"Meredith," he said, his eyes almost pleading for her to stop.

"And...tonight...I want you to know...you were right...to know you...meant that I would love you...and I do...you are my knight in shining armor...my prince charming... and even in fairy tales, Derek," she said, as the tears that had threatened to spill began the slow descent along her cheeks, "it's not a smooth road...to happily ever after...but we made it...and tonight..."

He didn't let her finish and put both their glasses down and reached for her and embraced her, murmuring in her ear, "I'm sorry...I'm so sorry, Meredith...I'm so sorry for all the times I've hurt you."

"This is not about being sorry...Derek," she said hugging him close to her, and pulling back to look at him, "I've hurt you too...but ...Derek...our fairy tale...it's ours, uniquely ours...and tonight...that's what I want to drink to...to the life we will have together, that story...that once upon a time...that one day we will tell our children..."

Hi mouth swooped down to capture hers and their tears blended together and the salty combination of the two spoke of wounds that had begun to heal; broken hearts mending and souls rejoicing having found their mate for a lifetime. They broke apart as they both needed to catch their breath, and smiled as each wiped away the tears from the other's face, and he reached for both flutes again.

"To our story...a love of legends..." he said and they raised and clinked their glasses and heard the distinguishable sound of fine crystal chiming in the magic of the night.

"A love of legends," she said as they both brought their glasses to their lips and sipped, before she started to cry and he reached out to hold her.

"Hey..." he whispered, as he kissed the top of her head, "you can't cry."

"I'm happy...Derek...I am...that I'm going to be your wife."

"That doesn't usually go with tears..."

"It does...they're happy tears...they are...I promise" she said as she looked at him, and he saw and felt her vulnerability and the trust she was once again willing to place in him, and vowed that he would never let her down again, and kissed her. The taste on their lips of champagne, of passion waiting to be unleashed, of romance ready to be enjoyed and of lovers ready to be seduced.

"Meredith," he said later, "I promise, I will spend all of our lives loving you...making myself worthy of your love and trust again."

"You already are Derek...you were my knight even when I pushed you away...you saved me...you brought me back to life...and you've been my prince charming when I dared not believe."

"You saved me too..." he told her, "you saved me too."

"So...this is our new beginning...our new life..."

"You're happy," he questioned, their bodies slightly apart.

"Are you?"

"Yes," he said, but the word carried all his hopes and dreams.

"I love you...more each day..." she said, "though sometimes I don't think that's possible...but today..."

"I didn't mess up completely..." he said.

"You...made me believe in fairy tales tonight...every woman Derek, would believe, if they'd have the man they love say the words you did."

"Until...later..."

"And then," she looked at him seriously, but tenderly "having that man top the proposal by wanting to marry her now...not wanting to wait...."

"Uhmmm..." he said as he filled their glasses again.

"Derek...there's more to that..."

"I didn't mean to rush you, I just...I was happy and all of a sudden it felt like the perfect thing to say...the perfect moment...the romance of it all...here in Venice."

"It was...and I will always treasure tonight."

"But..."

"Hey, that is a banned word...remember," she smiled.

"Meredith..."

"Derek...right now...this moment...we're celebrating...we're getting our chance... we're here together..."

"We're getting married," he said incredulously, "you're going to marry me, here."

"I am..."

"You're sure..."

"Aren't you...Derek...I mean unless you want to wait...if you still have doubts, I understand."

"No...I have no doubts of wanting to spend my life with you," he said, as he kissed her softly.

"Neither do I...I just thought, we couldn't go blindly into this....we had to at least be aware of it Derek, that it may not be easy."

"I'll be right back," he said, and she decided avoidance would no longer work between them.

"Where are you going, Derek, you can't walk away from this conversation."

He laughed, "Meredith...I'm going to dump the water from this bucket...and you need to call room service and ask that they bring more ice."

"Oh."

"Yes, oh," he said as he turned and walked away with the bucket to dump the now melted ice in the bathroom sink, and she picked up the phone and called room service.

He walked out of the bathroom and stopped as he watched her naked body and the fluid movements as she stepped into her grey sweat pants and then unclasped her bra and put on a long sleeve shirt.

"You're watching me," she said softly, surprising him.

"You knew I was watching...you...tease..."

"I always know when you're watching me...did it work..." she smiled and suddenly felt her body pressed against his.

"Feel for yourself," he told her and nuzzled her placing kisses along her neck, "maybe I should have saved some of the ice water," he joked, "instead of a cold shower."

"Derek," she said as she turned and wrapped her arms around his neck, "I told you...tonight...some of your favorite things," she murmured.

"When we're together again," he said, his eyes growing dark with lust, "I want to be able to bury myself inside of you...over and over...I don't want to have to stop."

"But...Derek...we can...I don't want to wait...tonight...we can celebrate."

"Tempting as it is...you heard Dr. Cameron...two days...he wants us to wait...and we'll wait..."

"Derek..." she said against his mouth, "it's Sunday...I'm not waiting beyond Tuesday..."

"I don't want to wait...you must know I don't," he said firmly pressed against her and she felt his growing erection, "but...we're not taking any chances with your health."

"It's just a precaution...he's being very conservative."

"Tuesday night...Meredith....we will celebrate...all night..."

"Oh...God..." she murmured against his lips.

"I'm going to change out of these clothes too," he said and handed her the empty ice bucket, and when he joined her again, she had her legs curled under her on the love seat in the sitting area, and had placed the bucket now filled with ice again and the bottle of champagne on the round table next to it.

"Join me," she said as she smiled.

"Tease," he laughed.

"I love you Derek," she said and was comforted by his laughter and then by his arms embracing her.

"You're wide awake, aren't you?"

"I am...that nap this afternoon."

"I told you."

"I'm sorry, I was really tired..."

"It's ok, I was tired too."

"So now..." she said with a soft sigh.

"Now...we talk."

"We talk," she agreed.

"Where do we start..." he asked.

"Tonight...our misunderstanding."

"I thought you wanted to talk about..."

"The day I drowned," she said, "yes...that is important, though I think we need to start with tonight."

"We jumped to conclusions."

"We did...and it got completely out of hand. Derek, there's a lot we need to talk about, and we have to be open...we have to face our issues..."

"I tell you," he joked, "you'll be rethinking your specialty soon."

"We...are too important to make light of this."

"I'm not making light of it Meredith, I'm actually very proud of you...unlike how I've behaved, you are the one making progress."

"Ok...you see... that has to stop...it's not a matter of blame...or being right or wrong...it's about understanding each other Derek...our fears...our hopes...how we make this work..."

"We will Meredith, we will make it work."

"We're going to say things, Derek...I'm sure...that may hurt the other...and we can't let that stop us...not anymore...we need to listen to each other...because...there are many things...so much I need to tell you, things that you may decide mean we should wait to get married."

"There is nothing...nothing...that would make me want to wait...I don't want to spend another minute without you...I want to fall asleep every night in your arms...and every morning when I open my eyes, it's you I want to see."

"We don't have to be married...we could be living together...if you want..."

"Nothing will change my commitment or my feelings for you. You are the love of my life...I don't want to wait to let the whole world know, that you too...feel the same way, that we both are in this...for a lifetime."

"Uhmm...marking your territory," she teased him.

"No... I don't want to have to be cautious or guarded about my feelings for you, I want to be able to look up and see you across the room and my stupid grin not cause gossip about us, I want everyone to know you're my wife...that we love each other and nothing is ever going to change that."

"So if I'm mad at you and yell at you... I can't just walk away...and have people talking about break up sex..."

"You could, I suppose still run away...there's always your house ...and...Meredith...I'm sure there will be make up sex...through the years...but no break up sex...ever again."

"I can live with that," she said and kissed him and tasted the just sipped champagne on his lips.

"Ok," he said and pulled her back against him.

"Derek, tonight...I told you earlier, what happened we can't do this anymore, this constant mistrust and jumping to conclusions, second guessing the other' s meaning."

"I know that...how are we going to handle that..."

"Why do we do it...why are we always ready to think the worse?"

"Trust..." he said quietly, "we need to trust each other...no more doubts."

"I trust you Derek," she said as she felt herself turned to face him.

"I understand, that I did not let you finish what you wanted to say, but later...you said you'd made your decision...and you were ready to walk away."

She took a deep breath, "yes, I was, I couldn't continue the way we were."

"So, you didn't really want to say yes, to getting married in Venice?"

"No...I told you I'd made my decision, but that you had a choice to make, about what you wanted, because I knew...I knew I wanted to marry you...but you are the one going back and forth...every time things don't turn out the way you expect you take it back...you retreat."

"I do not."

"Yes, you do."

"You're not exactly forthcoming in," he started to say defensively.

"You see," she said, and brought her hand to his face and softly caressed him, "this is what we can't do, it's not about blame, it's about talking things through."

He sat quietly and she gave him the time he needed, without pressing him.

"You said, after tonight, there'd be no turning back...what if you'd walked away."

"That would only have happened if you had told me you were leaving tomorrow, I told you only you could push me away, in my heart I had already made my commitment to you when I said yes to your proposal, and when you asked...I honestly felt there was no reason to wait...as long as we talked, as long as I gave you the option to choose if you wanted to wait...after we talked."

"You don't trust my feelings for you..." he said, and she heard his fears, "you keep saying that I may want to walk away."

"You may...I'm dark and twisty...and my life has been shit, and I would understand...if you need to wait, till I go back...more therapy."

"I need for you to trust me Meredith, please...we can't do this...not without trust."

"I know...we can't," she said, and both had tears in their eyes, "you don't trust me either."

"You're wrong...I trust you...with my life."

"Then what happened tonight...why did you turn away from me...walk away, instead of fighting for us."

"You said...you didn't..."

"Derek..."

"I don't know..." he said in frustration.

"Yes..." she said and kissed him softly, "yes...you do."

"You don't know everything," he said.

"I know that...it's why we're here...talking," she said softly.

"You're treating me like a child," he said pouting.

"You're acting like a child...pouting...and brooding...beating yourself up...over things we can't change."

"You're sure...this talk...you want this talk for things to work out between us or drive us farther apart."

"Oh... you ass...." she said and smacked him, "lighten up Shepherd...before I have to call your Mother and have her knock some sense into you."

"Did you...seriously, just threaten to call my mother?"

"Yes...you moron."

"Wonders...never cease," he said with a smile on his face.

"Are you mocking me?"

"Not on your life...you just made me love you more..."

"Don't play games with me Shepherd."

"Don't play games with me Grey."

"I'm not."

"You would not call my mother," he teased.

"Want to bet," she said and gave him a look that left no doubt in his mind she was not kidding.

"I'll be damned."

"She'd be on my side you know," she said smugly.

"Yes...I believe she would be."

"Derek," she began her voice more serious, "we made promises...the last few weeks we made promises not to pull away, and tonight we failed miserably."

"I don't have any excuses. I'm sorry," he said and she sensed his detachment.

"Derek...please...don't ..." she said softly, "I'm not blaming you. I take equal responsibility, but please don't shut me out. I'm trying...really trying...please...talk to me...tell me how you feel...how you felt."

"I'm sorry..."

"I don't want you to be sorry, I want for you not to shut me out."

"It was the first thing that came to my mind...when you said that...that we couldn't get married."

"So you hurt me instead by telling me...it was payback..."

"I thought you said it wasn't about placing blame?"

"It's not blame...but we need to talk about it...understand how we're hurting each other Derek...telling me you were going back and that the trip was paid for and I could stay, that hurt me."

"I thought I had lost you," he said quietly, "again," barely above a whisper.