Step to You

SIXTY-EIGHT

Rose's POV

His face inches from mine, I opened my eyes.

"V-Van," I said, and stepped back.

I saw pain register in his eyes, and he slightly frowned.

"You love him still," he said and I heard regret in his voice.

"Van... I..." I wiped my eyes, "I'm sorry---"

"But all he does is hurt you! Can't you see it? Can't you see yourself?! Rose Anne, he's with Soyeon, and he won't ever come to you---"

I sobbed. "I'm sorry---"

He held my shoulders, "Rose---"

"I can't forget him!" I sobbed, and stepped away from him. "I just can't... I'm sorry Van..." I shook my head, and ran away.

I didn't care if it's dark or that I'm running outside alone. I just want to get away and be far from anyone. I know what I did might be something I can regret later, but giving up on what I feel right now is one thing I just can't do.

Not now.

I want to get angry at myself for doing that to Van, but I can't be with him when I know there's someone else I love.

Even if he loves another girl...

I cannot just fool myself.

The passengers in the bus all stared at me when I got in. It's eight in the evening and I am crying alone. But I don't care, I just seated at the farthest seat and covered my face with my hands.

Even the bus ride brings me memories of being with JK.

How am I supposed to forget him?

A few minutes later, I got off the bus. I looked at the direction of the house.

I'm sure that I'll see JK sooner or later. Maybe the only good thing is that we are moving out tomorrow. At least I can be far from him he wouldn't see me still having feelings for him.

A few blocks from the house, I stopped. What am I going to say to Mom and Auntie why I cried?

That I still can't get over JK?

I grimaced bitterly in spite of myself.

You're so pitiful, Rose Anne Leighton.

How about what my friends would say? I can only imagine Elise's reaction.

Well, what can I do? I'm so crazy for someone who can't even love me back.

I started to walk, as I drew deep breaths. If I don't want Auntie and Mom to ask, I must calm myself and---

"Rose Anne!"

Oh no. I'm starting to hear things...

I covered my ears and hastened my steps.

Please let me think clearly---

"Hey!"

I looked back, while still walking quickly.

JK?!?! Oh shoot I'm now seeing things!!!

Breaking into a run, I shut my eyes and faced in front. I was running when I stumbled into something and before I knew it---

"AAAAAAHHHHHH!"

I FELL.

INTO AN OPEN DRAIN.

And heck, I was now literally sitting on dirty, smelly water. I looked at my hands.