Bad Boys For Life....

21

Kas

"I wanna change my hair color......" I looked at my ends. I dunno, I change my hair like it ain't nothing. Right now, I was feeling like going solid black.....

"What color.....?" Angie asked me from the seat behind me. I dropped my head back and looked at her, upside down.

"I dunno.....maybe black. All I gotta do is go to Iman and he gon hook me up." I smiled at her, chewing my gum.

My eyes traveled next to her and they met the yellow ones of Quin. Him, Angie and Brandon got in the last row, I sat next to Nina and Q. Any other time before yesterday, I woulda took every chance to sit next to him. Today......?

Nah.....

I lift my head up and stared ahead. I know he's emotionally hurt and I should take my time. Buy my feelings were seriously hurt yesterday. I dunno what it really is that these guys been through......but I gotta be selfish and protect my heart, too. If Quin ain't wanna try something with me......I wasn't gonna be those women that keeps running after a guy.

Like......I love her. My favorite comedienne, but I was not gonna be another Nikki Parker from the Parker's.....where she always ran after professor Oglesvee? I wasn't gonna do it to myself. I looked down at my phone, when it buzzed.

Ta'ron: good morning

We kept it friendly and cordial. So every morning we'd greet each other. I ain't gonna lie, Ta'ron was actually funny as hell and so nice and sweet. Really cute.....

Should you.....?

Quin called me pretty, but I wasn't good enough to be with......? That's how I took it. Him telling me to maybe I should try something with someone else.......it kinda made me feel like, when I told Xavion (zay-vion) that I had MS. He took that shit as me possibly infecting him with it and you don't pass it to people. When he broke it off with me, I felt so low.....

That's how I felt with Quin. It felt like I wasn't too good for him. I coulda been understanding, been a real good girlfriend. I really liked him enough to trust in telling him bout me and.....

"This....I......what you think you want, I can't give you." I felt.....hurt. Embarrassed, really....

I tell him and this comes up all of a sudden......?

"I'm sorry, but it ain't gonna be fair to you.....maybe you should......" I get it. He ain't wanna deal with the stress on top of his pain.

I mean.....everybody gotta tolerance level with their emotional and physical pain. It's cool, message received.....

"Ok." I wasn't gonna beg him to try something, he don't want it.....that's fine.

Ta'ron crossed my mind. He was cute, chill and laid back. He knew bout my condition and always told me he would wait.....

He wasn't Quinlan, but he was interested.

"Ka-" Nah......I'll be a friend. But I don't want no pity. I just said that.

"It's cool Quinlan......I respect it...." I walked away and looked at the message.

Ta'ron: hope ur enjoying ur wknd

Me: wanna meet up 2morrow for like a lunch?

I looked up and walked back to the pool area. All of them were in the kitchen, each of them booed up. A bitter feeling climbed in my chest, I sat back on my chair. Plugging in my airpods, I stared out at the mountains.