Gazing in the Mirror

January 23 - Humbled, Again . . .

A humble man will always receive
the best that others have to offer;
for he recognizes the truth.
~ Jeremy Aldana

True humility does not mean
self-abasement, but is rather
that attitude which Emerson tells us
is willing to get its "bloated nothingness
out of the way of the Divine Circuits".
~ Ernest Holmes

It is quite the experience to witness one's self being humbled. It is important to allow the humbling without losing perspective about the value of one's self. I am valuable to myself and often I also feel my value to Life itself. This is not arrogance but thinking we are "special" is. And every once in a while opportunities arise to remind us that we aren't extraordinary or super special and if we are very fortunate simultaneously we will also be shown that we actually are special in someone else's eyes. I think of this as a Divine balancing effect.

What a blessing that Life is this way !! In "public" life I have always been willing to share my weaknesses. Many people are afraid to do that because it allows our self to be vulnerable in the sight of other people. If in sharing our weakness and making our self vulnerable we find our self under attack we will find within our response to that our own strength. Neitzsche has been quoted as saying – "That which doesn't kill me, makes me stronger." Whether our strength is in overcoming, in recovery or in realizing some deep truth about our self – we are full of strengths that we often don't realize until we need them.

Mother Teresa described a few of the circumstances that Life might throw our way, to allow us "practice" humility – "To accept contradictions and correction cheerfully. To pass over the mistakes of others. To accept insults and injuries. To accept being slighted, forgotten and disliked. To be kind and gentle even under provocation." I do try to remember – I really am far from perfect and that helps me not to judge others when they appear to be that way. I try to remain humble because I really don't think I am "better" than any other human being but sometimes we are not humble "enough" – and Life may just send us a few reminders of that fact.

I am quite aware of ALL that I cannot possibly "know" about Life but I am proud of all that my long life has allowed me to know more directly, experientially, by the proof of its own substance. It is not rules, or customs, or laws that guide me but the Spirit of what caused the expression of these. I want to do the right thing because internally I know what something would be, should be, could be – if given a bit of my own heartfelt effort. I also know well enough that I am not going to change or save another person. My doctors sometimes think they can "save" my life but I know in truth that at best they are only able to prolong it. Who am I to say when another has learned sufficiently whatever they needed to learn ? – to decide for their own reasons to try something new. Discovery is for each and every individual to enjoy in their own way.

Why is it that 95% of the awesome superheroes you have ever known about really wish to have the burden of that blessing lifted because it is also truly a curse ? I think I know. I'm always trying to relieve myself of my own curses of responsibility. Oh I'm responsible by nature but I hate it when my own sense of responsibility is pushed on by other's who think I should be somehow different than I am. When one is placed into certain positions there is always someone around who would delight to see them fall. Even if they have gained a position by diligent, caring, hard work – someone will not like that they have become trusted, respected, or admired by others. Even back in public school when I was making straight As it became a burden because of countless others wanting me to do the work for them. But then again I do love it when someone else can shorten my own learning curve.

So to be humble one has to admit that they are not an island. One has to admit that sometimes they need a bit of help. Sometimes one has to humble themselves before the onslaughts of life and say to the Divine, "I surrender, may the outcome serve the highest good". Sometimes one has to step down from the mountaintop to allow others to step up there and see the view. It is a breathtaking view – sometimes. Sometimes the view is so beautiful that we think we want to stay up there forever. Then again the reality that Life is not meant to rest on its laurels or stagnation takes over and so we move on.

~ perspective

I often find that I don't really need
to think about myself for I know
I am equal to other humans in what
makes me that and I know I have gifts
that make me different but those are
not the same for everyone nor a big deal.
If I stop to think about it the entire
population of this planet could all be
defined as "others" and realizing that
makes "me" fairly darned insignificant
and totally unique.
I find it incredibly easy to say
"I don't know" when I don't.
Humble is easy when one feels utterly
secure in the life that they are living.
Both criticism and applause are the
temporary manifestations of the
fickle nature of Life.

#assistance #challenges #experience #failures #judgment #responsibility #strength #surrender #value #vulnerability