Gazing in the Mirror

December 24 - Celebrating Gratefully

The more you praise and
celebrate your life, the more
there is in life to celebrate.
~ Oprah Winfrey

God's Will is always toward
Life and more Life....The
Life within you is God;
whatever is true of God is
true of your Life, since
your Life and the Life of
God are not two but One....
This Life within you, being
God, did not begin and it
cannot end; hence you are
immortal and eternal . . .
~ Ernest Holmes

Back in 2012 when I first wrote this essay it was the day after I had listened to my weekly Life Visioning session. At that time, I would leave for my hike listening to Rickie Byars-Beckwith sing until I got to the song whose lyrics include "I'm ready to listen now". Then I would jump over to the last song on the cd which is a Peace chant. Then I would find a place to settle down. Over that year preceding my writing of this essay, I would often chose to settle upon a very large, flat sitting rock in an area of our farm that we refer to as "the staging area". It is a place where 4 different roadways all enter into a large, circular flat space on a hill top. It feels very protected and peaceful there. In recent years my husband has been sorting through the mountains of rock we have left over from a construction project. Many of the rocks he has taken away to shore up roadways throughout our farm. It had become necessary to use those rocks because we had embarked upon a careful program of logging with the intention of improving the health of our forest over a period of 6 years using a selective harvest strategy.

So back then, once I'd settle down, I would put the cd in my player with the Life Visioning guided meditation by the Rev Michael Bernard Beckwith. At the time I first wrote this essay, I had recently watched a global broadcast from Agape's location in California for the Birth 2012 event (which I have been writing about in several recent essays). At times, some of my Life Visioning meditations (which I have been doing regularly since 2009) become very deep, intense or blissful. That day's meditation had felt "balanced" and yet delivered to me some happy insights. As I wrote this, the year 2012 was almost "history". By that point, I could already look back at all the hype and so many purported channelings that indicated either we were going to be "visited" by aliens who would change the nature of our planet forever or that Ascension meant that we would have to leave behind loved ones because they weren't "ready" to ascend. Even though I understand that Life includes a need for discernment – these extremes still troubled my heart deeply. I was anxious. I put on 10 lbs and then became very ill and lost all of that excess weight. I found the year 2012 a bit hard to get through at times.

When one of the channelers that I had the greatest difficulty in "accepting" and never could really resonate with was publicly hit by a scandal of sorts, I could see how easy it is to deceive people by preying on their hopes for a better future. Either this channeler had a nervous breakdown or he was being used by sinister forces of unknown origin to spread disinformation by attracting people with a heartfelt desire for a significant "change" in human conditions. Whatever the reason, I suppose no one will ever actually know for certain what happened to or with the guy. It stands out for me as one of the more "memorable" aspects of that 2012 year's craziness. Once that person dropped off the radar screens – suddenly and completely for whatever reason – I actually settled down within my own self as well.

During my Life Visioning yesterday, I realized that I had passed a "personal test" of sorts. I chose Earth, I chose my family and friends here. I didn't care about extraterrestrials coming or not (though I will admit that at the time, I was looking up at the night sky many, many nights and sometimes I even thought I saw "something remarkable" or unusual but never certain nor provable). I still would prefer that humanity "saves" its own species without ET help to be honest about it. And I decided pretty much in a similar vein about Ascension. Whether I personally was "ready" or not – if it meant ceasing incarnation or leaving physical manifestation on Earth permanently, etc – I didn't want it. So whether either of these were real possibilities or not I chose to "stay" here within a conventional Earthly life and continue to do what I've been doing for a very long time – simply be the best "me" I know how to be and to love generously. I will offer wisdom if it seems to arise within me that I might serve Life and my Creator. I simply do not need, want or desire "extraordinary" or "special" for my own self. I am happy to be simply one more human individualization of the Divine life force that animates us all.

I realized something else about Spirit – that I am able to "see" Spirit in human beings. I still desire to better develop that ability within my own self, so that I can extend that awareness to seeing "Spirit" in other living manifestations (animals, birds, trees, and even rocks which I do love, if such could be considered "living") upon the Earth. I think of the Earth as my primary "mother", who I called by that name – Gaia. I sense that with the first "Earth Day", Gaia began to "wake up" to Itself as an individuation of planetary consciousness on a Cosmic scale. When I first "saw" Spirit in people back in my early 20s, it scared me. I didn't know how to interpret it. Now I have a "new" comfort level and a concept of "Oneness" about that expression of intelligence and conscious awareness that Spirit represents. Who knows what it actually is that I see ?

I understand energetic waves and ripples. I understand the effects of spiritual practices and understandings and processes. I realize that much of humanity remains in a sad state of being and if I could in any way assist metaphysically in the raising of the overall quality of Life by conscious intention it would match my heartfelt desires. So I admit it, I am grateful that 2012 did come to a rather conventional close. I am grateful for all of the understandings that I've received by having a spiritual perspective. I know that my understanding is likely to continue to "evolve" for the remainder of my Life – in fact I sincerely do hope there is always "more" to understand. I feel a peacefulness with just Being. I feel a clarity of mind that I am able to appreciate. I am grateful simply that I breathe for that indicates that I am yet alive. Life is meant to be celebrated. It is a brief blip on the scale of historic time and I am grateful I have an opportunity to live on this Earth at this time in history.

~ perspective

I am very comfortable and happy with
how I am in this moment of NOW.
I am grateful for the intensities and
uncertainties of the year 2012 now
past for through them I have learned
a lot and have grown more confident
of my inner understandings.
I am ready to listen to what Life
Itself has to whisper to me now
and I am excited about the journey
that is now continuing with a renewed
optimism for improvements coming.
I am reminded at this time of the
importance of discernment and that
no one else can do this for me,
I simply find my own way of being
"my self" IS the highest calling
of this lifetime.
I am happy to have this sojourn
of incarnated life on Earth and I'm
in no hurry to return to the non-physical
realm for I know that it will always
"be there" awaiting my reunion with
"whatever" is there – for happily
to everything there is a season.

#anxiety #discernment #energy #future #hope #life #meditation #mother #roads #spirit