Lost Innocence

Chapter fifty two- Sebastian

*6 WEEKS LATER*

I hadn't really had a proper conversation with Ivy in god knows how long. The fact that Elliot and Carrie were still together and that me and Ivy were best friends with one of them, made us not seeing each other harder. I did want to see her, but i couldn't stand the awkwardness that was suffocating the air every time we even looked at each other.

In this very moment us four were at some cafe eating ice creams. Elliot and Carrie were chatting away beside me and Ivy, and there was that suffocating air that was beginning to build.

"So, how have you been?" Ivy mumbled in my direction.

"Erm, i've been alright. You?" I asked. What i really wanted to ask was whether or not the idea of Alex was out the picture, but that seemed highly un-doubtful.

"Yeah, i guess. I haven't seen you with anyone." She said and looked up at me.

My eyes locked on hers for the briefest of moments before i looked away. "That's because i'm not with anyone." I said back, sharper than i meant to. "How's Alex?"

"He's fine." She murmured.

I smiled at her in response, even though I wanted to rip the guys head off. "I was just asking, that's all." I admitted.

She looked up at me. "I know that you don't really care, so you didn't have to ask."

Well that hurt like a motherfucker. Of course I cared about her, that's why I had asked, because I had hoped they weren't together.

"No, you're wrong. I don't care about him, but I care about you." I replied, looking at her.

She looked at me again, before looking away. "You know we can be friends right?" She added.

I shook my head. "We can't be friends, that's too hard."

"Why?" She asked, even though I knew she knew the answer to it.

"Ivy, you know why. I can't be your friend because when I touch you..."I said, brushing my fingers across her cheek. "...I can't help but want you all over again." I finished and dropped my hand from her face.

"I told you to let me go." She sighed.

"Doesn't mean I listened." I said and stood up.

"Hey, Elliot. I'm going to get out of here, I have somewhere I need to be." I lied.

He gave me a look, but nodded none the less. "See you later, man."

I patted him on the back and gave a small smile in Carrie and Ivy's direction, before leaving.

It felt like somebody was crushing my windpipe, i could barely breathe. Seeing Ivy again like that, was so hard, it was practically unbearable. She would always be this girl to me that no matter what i would cherish, she could push me away and shout at me all she wanted; some of it i deserved anyway, but it wouldn't lessen my affection or overwhelming feelings for her. The thing about Ivy was that she was so busy always helping other people and trying her hardest to be the best possible version of herself, that she had no idea how adored she was by everyone surrounding her. 

And god was she beautiful. But not any sort of beautiful, she wasn't somebody that would just turn heads when she entered the room. She was strikingly beautiful in every way possible; her laugh, the way her nose scrunched up slightly when she pretended she was annoyed, her mind that came up with things that had once seemed boring to me. She transformed everything, made it look like somebody could be worthy of receiving it. There were only certain woman who portrayed such beauty in the world, and Ivy Monroe, was one of those people. 

I sighed and realized that i had ended up at some bar. I shrugged and pushed open the door, making my way to the bench chairs, that had a few men already perched on. I ordered a beer, showing the barman my ID, he glanced at it before pushing the glass under the tap. I handed him a crumpled up note, as he sat the beer in front of me. 

My hands tightened around the glass as i recognized Alex, who was in a midst of friends. He couldn't see me, but i could see him. I moved slightly so that I could listen into their conversation. 

"So, what's happening with this little play toy of yours Alex?" I heard some guy say. 

"We're just messing around, nothing serious. In fact i'm meeting up with her tonight, so i'll be getting some action." Alex laughed. 

My hands automatically made into fists. Ivy did not deserve to be talked about like this. She would never be somebody's 'slam' piece, she could do so much better. She was the type of girl who should respect every last inch of herself, not sell herself short. 

"Maybe you should start sharing her." Some guy laughed. 

I downed my beer in one and stormed out of the bar. If i listened to them for any longer, i would end up hurting someone. Although, it would only be moral to punch them in favour of protecting my Ivy. She will always be my Ivy and i wasn't going to let some idiot take that away from me. I didn't care that she had told me to let her go and that i had said she was a lost cause that i would no longer fight for, i would fight. I wanted her back and i needed to protect her from Alex and his pathetic friends. 

Tomorrow Ivy would have school and i knew exactly where to find her. If i didn't warn her about Alex using her, then that made me just as bad. Ivy didn't need to be hurt anymore and i couldn't bare it if she was.