The Girl in the Mirror (Harry Styles fanfic)

Chapter 75

Chapter 75

Sienna’s POV

Harry watches me every step he takes as he walks towards the lift with Daisy by his side. I feel my bottom lip start to tremble and I know I’m about to breakdown. The last thing I want is for Harry to see how hurt I am by his actions but I can’t hide how I feel. I suddenly feel myself being pulled away from the lobby. I realise Liam is taking me away from all of this before I break. He is making sure nobody sees me upset especially Harry. We are suddenly alone in some sort of cleaning cupboard. I don’t protest or even care that he has pulled me into a musty smelling cupboard. I am just relieved that the sight of Harry and Daisy is no longer in front of me. I never want to have to see them again. I want to let my emotions out but I think I am in shock because I can’t seem to let myself cry. I am too tensed up to even speak. I just literally stand here stiffly with Liam in front of me because I can’t do anything. I can’t speak or do anything. I feel in a state of shock. How could he do this to me? How could he have moved on so quickly? How could he have flown her here knowing I would see them together? The only thing that feels real here is the pain, the pain he has caused me again.

It hurts knowing we have been broken up for two minutes and he has already whisked her out here. I feel like this was what he was waiting for, he was waiting for an opportunity to bring her out here. It’s like he had her on standby ready to come as soon as things went wrong with us. He knew deep down we weren’t going to work, maybe he didn’t even want it to work. I almost forget Liam is here until he attempts to comfort me. I can’t be comforted though. I don’t want him to comfort me. I feel empty, I feel alone and I know in reality I am. I am nothing without Harry and there’s no going back for us now. He doesn’t want me and that hurts more than all the other times he has treated me horribly. It hurts more than anything I have ever experienced before, I’m sick of feeling hurt all the time. I just want the ground to swallow me up and save me from this embarrassment. The embarrassment of thinking that Harry still wanted me deep down and that we could work through this. I thought we could because we have always worked through everything before. We can’t work through this though not anymore. It’s clear that he doesn’t give a shit about me now, I need to start remembering that.

Liam holds me but I don’t like it. I don’t like him holding me, I don’t want anyone to hold me. I don’t want him to know how hurt and how stupid I have been. I don’t want anyone to know what a fool I have been. I knew letting someone in, like properly letting them in was a mistake. This is what happens when you let your guard down. This is what happens when you trust other people and when you care about them. I won’t make that mistake again. I couldn’t cope if I was ever to go through all of this again. How could I have been so stupid? I always promised myself I wouldn’t become this person. This weak pathetic person I am now and it’s all his fault. I hate myself for allowing myself to become this emotional, needy person I am today but I hate him more. That stupid arsehole with his green eyes and his stupid curly brown hair. He never gave a shit about me, did he? How could I have ever thought he did?

I quickly pull out of Liam’s caring hold. The thought of having him close to me makes my stomach churn. “I want to be alone” I tell him. He nods even though I can tell he doesn’t want me to be alone. He wants to help me but I am way beyond help. I walk away from him quickly before the tears fall. I walk out of the cupboard relieved that nobody noticed us go inside together and also that Harry has gone. I quickly make my way across the lobby stumbling slightly because I’m drunk and my heels are high. I decide to take the stairs because I don’t want to risk bumping into Harry in the lift. He’s probably just going up and down in the lift waiting for me to get in so he can rub this in my face even more. I start to cry as soon as I am out of view of the lobby and my foot hits the first step. I keep climbing up the ridiculous amount of stairs as I sob all the way up them. I didn’t even think about how many steps there would be up to the penthouse but as I reach the top I am exhausted. I immediately collapse at the top of the stairs as I try to catch my breath. I just wait there exhausted and hurt. I can’t hide the hurt anymore. I don’t even want to hide it.