[Chapter Thirty-Six] Where Words Are Spoken

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Chapter Thirty-Six – Where Words Are Spoken
Bailey's Pov

Larissa wasn't doing so great and I knew that meant everyone else was suffering just that much more and I knew I had to do something. It was one in the morning when I got to her house and I could see Carter and Julian's car's parked out front.

I went to the front door and grabbed the spare key under a loose stepping stone and let myself in. It was quiet and Robert was asleep on the couch when I snuck past, I took my shoes off outside so I wouldn't wake anyone else and I eased up the steps.

I looked into the two spare rooms to see Danielle, Cameron and Carter asleep and then Julian asleep but not well, he was tossing a bit in his sleep.

I watched him for a minute and felt sad, this situation was sad and I wished that it could be different, I really did and I could at least talk to him without wanting to scream or cry now so I would consider that progress.

I watched him cling onto a pillow like he would with me when we slept and it made me smile. It was a little creepy I admit sneaking in here but I closed the door quietly and went to Larissa's door, I knew she was still awake because I could hear her crying.

I pushed the door open slowly

"I'm fine honey, go back to sleep." She said but I kept going in and shut the door.

"Julian's asleep." I told her and I could make out her figure jump and she slammed on the light by her bed.

"Bailey baby, you almost gave me a heart attack." Her hand was over her chest and I looked at her, she looked awful but I wouldn't say that to her.

"Julian said you weren't doing so well." I whispered and I went over to her bed

"I'm okay." She lied but I'm pretty sure she believed that.

"They're all worried about you Larissa, you need to sleep." I reached out and grabbed her hand

"I can't." she closed her eyes

"Why aren't you talking to any of them?" I asked her and she cried some more

"Because I don't want them to know how much of a monster he was, he's still their father, they don't need to know some things and every time I try to sleep he's there." she was scared to sleep.

"He can't hurt you anymore." I scooted closer to her and leaned my head on her shoulder. Our legs hung over the side of the bed and she held onto my hand.

"But he is." It was sad to see her cry, I loved her more than my own mother and I didn't like seeing her so sad.

"We know the truth and it will come out, it's a small time compared to your life. You're thinking about doing it, aren't you?" I asked her and she cried harder as she nodded and that was what I was afraid of. Julian has already lost too many people this way.

To me she wasn't difficult to read and some things were obvious whereas Julian's judgement on her was a little clouded and if he wasn't careful then he was going to lose her and I don't know how much more he can take. If he lost his mother I'm pretty sure he wouldn't recover, he would leave too.

"He'll never forgive you Larissa. You finally have your boys back and a great guy in your life. You're a grandmother. There is so much more to your life." she shook her head and I felt my eyes burning with tears too.

I hated seeing her life this and it scared me.

But I knew how she was feeling, she felt helpless and I know what it feels like to think suicide is the only way out, it's a horrible and suffocating feeling that I wouldn't wish on anyone. Scars lined my wrists, arms and legs where I would cut which added to my track marks and I remember how I felt before I passed out when I overdosed.

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