Still I Can Feel You - Joel Hokka

Last Kiss

  October 2016, Helsinki - Oulu

It's been more than a whole month since i moved in Helsinki. This place here is really amazing. People are so nice and from the first days that I got here it felt like home. I really miss my town, Oulu but I think I made the best decision by moving here, of course what i miss the most is my family and by this I don't mean only my parents and siblings but my best friends and Kristy.

They've got here twice and I've also visited them once but it's now like it used to be when I was able to see them every day. We can't do the things we used to but we've been speaking in the phone every day. The person I miss the most is Kristy.

When she revealed to me that she also likes me even if she's not sure about her feelings I felt bad for leaving her. Everytime we met each other nothing more happened and I didn't even manage to feel her lips on mine again. We weren't able to kiss any time since Niko was with us the whole time and as she texted me once she doesn't want Niko to know anything about what's happening between us and this makes me miss her more now.

There were only few moments moments that we managed to talk normally and openly and that happened when Niko wasn't at home.

I was having her next to me and I couldn't pull her in my arms and stay like that for a while, I couldn't even kiss her.

Now it's been more than three days since she hasn't called or answered in my texts and I don't even know why. I've talked with Niko but I couldn't ask why she doesn't answer to me. I just made sure that she was fine as Niko said. I just hope that nothing bad happened this time.

But I'm gonna find myself since I'm going to Oulu today. We're about to release our first album in Sunday and I'm supposed to be there in two days but I wanna surprise them and I actually wanna know what's happening with Kristy and this way she won't expect me there and won't have thought about something to say.

After eating breakfast and packing a bag with as many clothes as I would need. I left my apartment and went in the airport. I wasn't in a mood to drive for so many hours and I also didn't want to be tired when I would go to them.

I decided to go at Niko's first and then I would stay at Joonas. He liked it or not.

All the times he came to Helsinki. Almost once a week he always stayed to me without even asking. I think now it's my turn and as we say since the day we became friends what's mine is his and what's his is mine

In less than two hours I was in the airport of Oulu. I called a taxi and in a matter of minutes I'm gonna be infront of them. We haven't talked since last night and they of course won't expect to see me today. I just wanna keep Kristy in my arms though. I hope that Niko won't be home so I can manage to get some time alone with her.

"Thank you" I paid the driver and walked out of the car after taking my bag

Well I'm really excited and happy, let's hope that their gonna also be happy when they see me.

I walked in the building and then up the stairs. This usual silence as always like no one was there but in fact so many people in every apartment.

When I reached the second floor, I let my bag down and fixed my jacket. I took a breath and rang the doorbell.

Not long after Niko appeared infront of me. Well the plan of spending some time alone with Kristy sunk. I'm sure that we're gonna manage to stay alone even for five minutes all the days that I'm gonna stay

"Joel" he said surprised and looked to the direction where the living room is 

"Hey man" I smiled and he kept his shocked expression