"Is Master Makarov here?"
"You're finally back from your island getaway," Mira walked to them.
"So how was it? Did you have fun?"
"It was work. Not a vacation," Erza corrected.
"Uh Mirajane? I wouldn't joke around right now," Lucy nervously warned her.
"Where is Makarov?" the redhead demanded.
"He went out of town for some last minute council meeting or something like that," Macao answered.
"He's been gone since yesterday."
The wizards sighed in relief.
"Well that was a close one," Natsu said.
"Yes. We won't have to deal with 'that' until Gramps gets back," Gray held a fist up.
Happy cried anime tears and waved his arms frantically in happiness.
"Dammit. I really wanted to see it."
"You're so mean, (M/N)!"
The blonde freaked out the most and they were all silenced by the redhead. The two male wizards hugged each other and the girl and cat hid behind the lucky wizard. He sweat dropped.
"Do you know when the master will be returning?"
"No. But I would imagine he'd be back anytime now," the white haired woman answered.
"Now listen up, you fools. You're not getting off the hook. You broke guild rules by taking on that S-Class quest. Prepare to be punished."
The two wizards and cat hugged each other after she finished her sentence. The blonde panicked once again while the (S/C) man sweat dropped.
"Well. It was nice knowing ya. It's a crying shame. Those boys are one thing. But I can't believe Lucy's getting punished too. Oh you poor girl," Wakaba muttered.
"'You poor girl'?" the girl repeated. The two wizards walked up to the man with the weird hair.
"What's the deal man? How come you don't feel sorry for us?"
"Why are you lugging me in with this loser?" they then fought each other. The lucky wizard sighed before walking to them. Cana and Elfman had slightly horrified expressions before the boys went quiet.
"I think being a man is part of owning up to your actions. You hear that you two? It's time for you to man up."
Happy complained why nobody felt sorry for him and Lucy panicked over what would happen to her.
*Small time skip*
There was a piece of paper with illegible writing. It was almost entirely black. The dragon slayer and ice wizard looked at it.
"Whoa. That's one creepy-looking job request," Natsu commented.
"Yeah it is," Gray added.
"You guys are back. What's up?" Loke asked.
"Not much man. What the heck? Can't even read it."
"Read what?" Lucy asked.
"Whoa! You're back too, Lucy?!"
"Jeez. It's real nice to see you too," she retorted.
"What is your problem with me?"
He was about to answer when he was pounded to the floor by the armored woman.
"No way! You won't be taking any requests."
"Real smooth."
"Do they have to be so noisy?" Cana complained.
"Who cares? They're like the coolest!" Romeo whispered.
"You're kidding me, right?"
"'Decipher this text and I'll see that you'll, increase your wealth by five thousand Jewel'. This one sounds like a winner to me. What do you think?" Natsu asked.
"It sure does," Happy agreed.
"So it's a translation job? That's a weird request for a guild. Wait. That's some crazy ancient stuff. No one's gonna be able to read that."
"Hold on. It's written in modern letters too," the cat pointed out.
"I thought I told you no jobs," Erza scolded.
"Oh yeah! I can totally read that. Let's see," he read the text then held his head in confusion. He glowed brightly with the rest of his friends nearby.
"What's going on?" Macao asked.
Wakaba then said something that made no sense to his friend. The request and everyone else stopped glowing. Then the ice wizard shivered.
"What? Ice wizards don't get cold, crybaby," Elfman pointed out.
The dark blue haired man held himself and shook, asking for the heat to be turned up. Everyone watched, confused. Then the blonde spoke in a weird voice. She complained about her heavy chest and her back. The ice wizard responded then freaked out after seeing the blonde. Loke got up and the dragon slayer sparkled. He saw the celestial wizard and ran away.
"What's your problem?! Can't face me, dragon breath?! Why do I sound like a girl?"
"I'm no doctor but it's probably cause you are a girl."
"Why is everyone behaving so foolishly?" everyone turned to the voice which turned out to be Happy with hands on his hips.
"Oh wow Natsu! Check it out! Hmm? Where did he go?" Erza asked with pink cheeks and no armor.
"I'm standing right here. Why is this place so dark?" Loke squinted.
The red haired woman squeezed her chest. The men blushed and the cat had blue lines under his eyes. He tried to kick her but his foot met with a chest plate. He brooded while everyone stared down at him.
"Why do they have to ruin my quality drinking time?"
"They're so cool, they can't ruin anything!"
Everyone watched with incredible shock and he wizards panicked.
"You idiots. Don't you realize what has happened to us? We've switched bodies," Happy said.
"Stop fooling around, Happy!" Loke went on his hands and knees.
"I'm Erza, you dimwit!"
"If you're going to yell at me Loke, do it to my face!" Erza yelled and a high pitched voice.
"You mean-" Gray asked.
"Yes. Natsu and Loke. Gray and Lucy. And worst of all, Happy and I. We have all switched bodies."
"HUH?!"
"Why's switching with me the worst of all?!"
"The ancient spell of Umpera has been cast. You kids haven't been feeling like yourselves today, huh?" everyone ran to the master.
"I had noticed the request on the board. By reading that page aloud, you have cast a powerful spell. The personality transfers. And that spell is called the Changeling."
"It sounds scary!" Lucy/Gray panicked.
"So you're really Natsu, right?" Gray/Lucy asked.
"Yeah?" Natsu/Loke answered.
He/She grabbed his colloar, "You idiot! What did you do to us?!"
"Me?! All I did was try to read the job request! Would someone just please turn on the lights?! Come on!"
"That's enough, Lucy. Uh, Gray. Since this spell switches more than just your bodies. It switches magic as well."
"WHAT?!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Loke/Natsu was walking in town slightly hunched.
"Aw man. Kinda feels like someone just poured down lava down my throat," he attempted to flirt with two woman but was unsuccessful. He was breathing fire and doesn't know how to stop it.
"Natsu!"
He turned around, still breathing fire. He saw a scary looking (M/N) storming his way. He only ran two steps before being yanked by his scarf.
"(M/N)! Please don't kill me! I didn't do anything!" he struggled to get free but was in vain.
"You ate an entire restaurant's supply dry. And I had to pay for all of it using my rent money. Don't think I'm gonna go easy on you," the lucky wizard dragged the wizard.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"There's one thing you should know. If the Changeling spell is not undone within thirty minutes it was initially cast, you will never return to the way you were before. Or the legend says at least."
"Do you know how many minutes we've been mixed up for?!" Natsu/Loke yelled frantically.
"Sixteen. So you have fourteen minutes," Mira answered.
"Hey Gramps! Isn't there a way to change us back?!"
Makarov hummed, "Since this is such an ancient magic, it would only stand to reason that I don't know."
They held dejected expressions while Erza/Happy flew aimlessly.
"I must say. I am disappointed. I've been looking forward to punishing you. But it looks like you got your hands full for now. Best of luck to you kids."
"ALRIGHT THAT'S IT! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" Gray/Lucy held his/her shirt. Lucy/Gray prevented him/her from taking it off. Happy/Erza then requipped into a swim suit with long pigtails. Erza/Happy tried to punch him/her but was elbowed accidentally. She/He brooded as the other complained (This is so confusing...).
"Everyone switched magic but they all stink at it!"
"Hey Loke. Or whoever you are," Wakaba said.
"Jeez it's me Natsu! Okay?!"
"Have you figured out what kind of magic he uses?"
"Yeah come on. Be a man, kid. Show us."
"I don't know. I don't feel anything magic wise. Everything just seems kind of fuzzy."
He held his head and couldn't take the pressure. Loke/Natsu ran to him with flames coming out of his mouth. Behind him was a demonic (Not literally. My god.) looking (M/N) chasing after him. Everyone quivered and Loke/Natsu hid behind Natsu/Loke.
"Natsu! Make (M/N) stop! He's going to kill me!"
"What did you do Loke?! He looks way scarier than normal!"
"Me?! He wanted to kill you! And what did he mean when he said you ate an entire supply of food from a restaurant?!"
Then Mira pointed out that ice came out of Lucy/Gray's mouth. Then Levy and her team came to the rescue.
"Shadow Gear team here to save the day. You guys will be back to normal in no time," Droy reassured.
"Oh yeah. We got this. No sweat," Jet agreed.
"Now do your thing, Levy," they spoke in synchrinozation.
"When you guys said 'we', you mean Levy, right?" Mira corrected.
"You're so sweet to help us," Lucy/Gray stated.
"Anything for my girl. Besides," she cupped her hand, "I want to read your novel. It'd be kind of weird talking about it with Gray."
"What are you gonna do?"
Levy had books on a table and glasses on, "Well I do know a thing or two about ancient text. I'll start by taking a look at what's written on the text itself."
"So you guys switched bodies and magic and all that shit?" (M/N) asked.
"Yeah. How did you know?"
"Natsu didn't look as terrified when I mentioned 'it'."
Natsu/Loke curled into a ball and rocked back and forth, "It's even worse than 'that'."
"No way. There's nothing worse than 'that'," Gray/Lucy crossed his/her panicked slightly.
"We're talking about (M/N) here! You do not wanna make him really, really angry!"
"What is 'it'? What's going on?" Lucy/Gray asked, slightly afraid of his answer.
"I don't even wanna talk about 'it'. Nobody deserves to go through that."
"W-What are you talking about?"
"If you wanna know so bad blondie, keep talking and I'll show you."
They both shivered before hiding behind Happy/Erza.
Erza/Happy jumped on the table, "Listen up everyone. We need to let Levy work in peace."
"Erza. You have fish n your mouth," (M/N) pointed out.
She/He brooded once again, "Why did I have a fish in my mouth?"
"Cause they're yummy," Happy/Erza answered with fish in his/her mouth.
Levy read the words in one of her books. Loke/Natsu announced there was ten minutes left.
"Hey. You sure it's alright to read the words out loud like that?" Gray/Lucy asked.
"Don't worry. It's perfectly safe as long as you don't read everything in the correct order."
Natsu/Loke complained and freaked out. Happy/Erza was about to requip again when Erza/Happy stopped it from happening (Who else is getting a headaches from this?). The blue haired girl closed her book. She told them she was stuck. The blonde tried to strip while the ice wizard (Screw it. My head hurts too much.), the dragon slayer in another body complained about the horrible sensation, the flirt complained about no woman ever talking to him again, and the cat brooding about being a cat for the rest of her life while the red haired woman with a cat thingy retorted.
"How much time do we have left?!"
"Eight minutes. Hate to say it, but you might start preparing for the worst," Macao said.
"I thought Natsu was annoying enough. I really don't want to deal with Loke."
"What's wrong with me?!"
"You make terrible jokes. You know how much I hate them," (M/N) scoffed.
"You make jokes, Loke?" Gray/Lucy asked.
Loke/Natsu sulked, "No. Not really."
Jet and Droy cheered Levy on. Wakaba sweat dropped. Everyone waited for the girl to reverse the spell.
"So what happens if we stay like this?" Gray/Lucy asked.
"Huh? What do you mean by that?" Natsu/Loke asked.
"Are we just gonna try to adjust to our new bodies and get back to work?"
"Well yeah. I guess we'd have to. It's not like we have a whole lot of options."
Happy/Erza didn't complain, making Erza/Happy fume a bit.
"Well no one asked for your opinion, did they?! Stupid cat! I just want to be a cute girl again!" Lucy/Gray cried.
"You call being annoying 'cute'?" (M/N) ridiculed.
"Shut up, (M/N)!"
"What was that, blondie?"
"Nothing sir! Sorry sir!"
One of them realized that they wouldn't be able to finish a job if they didn't know how to use each other's magic. They tried to make it work but then sulked. The lucky wizard sweat dropped. They all came to the harsh reality of being the weakest team in their guild. The armored woman tried to fly away but ended up landing on the cat.
Levy stood up, "I got it!"
Everyone looked at her with hope.
"Really?!" Natsu/Loke asked.
"Come on! Do it!" Gray/Lucy demanded.
"Alright. This is what it says," she then performed something. She was told to lift the spell and not read it. Lucy/Gray supported her and got her motivated.
"Levy. Just hurry. I don't want to hear Loke's jokes anymore than I already do," the (H/C) haired man glared at Loke/Natsu.
He moped, "They're not jokes."
Jet and Droy cheered her on, making Wakaba sweat drop again. Elfman supported them, making him even more confused.
"Three minutes left," Macao announced.
"Three minutes?!" Lucy/Gray had teary eyes. Erza/Happy accepted her fate as a cat. Macao announced that there was only one minute left. Elfman joined in on the cheering.
"Trying to break the spell, are you?" Makarov said.
"Look. If you're trying to teach us a lesson here, we learned it okay?"
He had something but drew a blank. Macao announced there was forty seconds left more or less. The blonde tried to take off the shirt but the ice wizard did not allow it.
"While it can be lifted, I'm afraid it has to be done one pair at a time. Meaning, it's impossible to change you back all at once."
"What?!"
"Thirty seconds. Ish."
"Which pair's going first?"
"Should be me and other me? Right?"
"Sounds good to me," Loke/Natsu agreed with sparkles all over for some reason.
"That's so not fair! I think it should be me and Gray!"
"Hold on! As Fairy Tail's strongest female wizard, I should go first! It's for the good of the guild!"
"Well I don't care either way."
As the seconds went by, Levy finally got it figured out. Macao counted down but was punched by Natsu/Loke, and told her to hurry. She chanted the spell (And all that crazy jazz happens. Just watch episode 19 if you wanna remember what happened cause I'm not writing it.).
The ice wizard and blonde celebrated. But he drooled ice cubes again.
"You gotta tell us. How'd you do it?"
"Well, I realized the words themselves had no meaning, I decided to read them backwards. It's actually an old trick. Ancient languages didn't have many letters. So sometimes they had to be more creative when they use their words. That's why, when the words were read backwards, the spell was reversed too."
(M/N)'s eyebrow twitched, "That could've been the first thing you've done. And you had a lot of time to do that. Instead, you all just freaked out and didn't even think it through. Why is everyone such a moron?"
However, everyone else didn't switch back. Instead, the entire guild had switched bodies. But the (S/C) man was lucky to not end up like everyone else did. Lucy, Gray and Levy and blue lines on their faces. (M/N) swore and punched a table, breaking it into pieces and scaring them.
A/N: Most. Confusing. Episode. Ever. Honestly, I almost regret writing this. My head ached the entire time. Writing something you barely understand is not something you wanna do guys. Trust me. And it's barely 11:00 pm. I need a life. See ya. Peace.