Harry's POV
"Miss you? Kendall you have got to be kidding me. What the hell are you even doing here?" I cross my arms against my chest, giving my ex girlfriend the death glare. She better not be here to give me or Y/N fucking trouble. That's the last thing we need right now. Especially when I'm trying to fix something that keeps getting hindered.
She takes a few steps closer to me, stepping back as she does so. "Oh come on Harry, don't act like you don't miss me." She smirks smugly. Jesus, she's fucking mental. "I heard your precious Y/N was found and that you're the hero. Congrats." Not sure if that's sarcasm, but surely it has to be. Dating her, I was blinded to see how venomous she really is. Y/N warned me time and time again that Kendall was no good for me. "And you're probably thinking what I'm doing here, and it's not just to congratulate you. I knew you'd be coming here."
"So what, are you stalking me now? No offense Kendall but that makes you look crazy. Which would make sense considering Andrew was the one behind her kidnapping, you both are really alike," I try walking past her but she blocks my way. Here we are standing on the sidewalk in front of Y/N's house when any moment she can see this happening.
"I'm aware of what Andrew did, but I am not insane like he is. Why he did it? Beats me, he left me shortly after you found us out. Harry I came here to tell you that I made a mistake, I shouldn't of cheated on you." She tries touching me but I jerk away. Her face scowls but I dismiss it. Not with this bullshit.
A let out a big HA, the nerve of this damn woman. "I'm sure Kendall. Sorry to disappoint, but I don't care. Y/N is in there, you know, the girl who I am madly in love with," I say pointing to her house. Kendall has lost her god damned mind if she thinks I'd take her back. "And tonight might be the night we finally end up putting everything in the past and be happy together because we love each other." She scans my face, her breathing growing into hard huffs and puffs. Her gaze then lands on the marks on my neck, her lips parting, gasping.
"Is that.." She begins but I stop her.
"Yeah, they came from her. And I gave her some too. I had the best night of my life with the woman that I love. So being the gentlemen that I am, please go. Before it gets nasty." I brush past her, but she's quick to pull me back and grip my head. Forcefully she puts her lips on mine. I put my hands on her shoulders, trying to push her off but she's insistent.
"Harry," my head shoots up hearing what I was dreading. My eyes lock with Y/N's as she stands on her front porch with Liam next to her. She looks like she's about to pass out.
"Y/N, baby no." I push Kendall off of me, making her stumble back.
Sprinting towards her steps, she backs away from me. The look on her face is enough to make me want to run into a wall. She looks afraid of me almost. I try stepping closer, but she moves back until she hits the wall. No tears, no nothing. Speechless. "Y/N," I whisper but she holds her hand up.
She shakes her head slowly. There's not an ounce of expression on her face. "Baby, I swear to fuck she kissed me. I know that sounds super cliché, please believe me please." Usually she would be in tears right now, it's a possibility she has run out of them. Fucking hell, every single time we're almost there something happens. "Y/N, please." I beg her to do something, anything.
"Harry," Kendall calls from behind.
"Liam please take her out of here. Take her please," I turn to him. He seems speechless too. "Liam," I growl harshly. "Take her away."
"And go where? Harold I can't just leave Y/N by herself. Look at what you're doing Harry. For fucks sake," He runs his hands through his short hair. "Kendall is not my responsibility. You're the one who caused all of this." My anger boils and it takes everything in me to not hit his face, or anything for that matter.
"Liam do me this fucking favor. You know I wouldn't kiss her, you fucking know that." I press, anger fuming throughout my body. I know he's doing this because he loves her but fuck that. "Please Liam, please take her away," sounding like a plead, begging really.
"Fine. But I'm doing it for Y/N. Enough is enough Harry. Stop putting her through so much shit. If you love her, and I mean really love her, let her go." He nostrils flare, eyes dark and intense. I don't I have ever seen Liam this.. Mad? Livid? It's all so fucking new. I hate the fact that he used to damned words on me. Of course I fucking love her, I've done about the damnedest things for her. It would only benefit the hell out of him, that's what he meant.
Liam can act like he has the upper hand because he's been mister goody two shoes, always by her side but he doesn't realize that's not enough to make a girl fall for you. I love the lad, but he's way out of line sometimes. I will always be thankful for the shit he has done for her. Being there to make up for my fuck ups, fixing what was left broken. But now it's my turn to fix what I break and hold it for as long as I humanly can.
He marches towards Kendall who's going on about god knows what. I refuse to let this shit happen, fuck no. Not this damn time. Once I hear him shut her car door with her in it, he drives off with screeching wheels.
I control my breathing to normality, returning my gaze to her. "Y/N, I did not kiss her. I was pushing her off, I swear on every little thing I have. Fuck."
"It was all lies, weren't they?" She finally speaks. Her voice sounds too calm and careless. "You fucked me. You got what you wanted, right? Of course. You saw me vulnerable and thought that was the perfect opportunity. History does repeat itself, doesn't it?" She's biting on her lip. That same fucking lip I bit over and over again yesterday. This is more heart wrenching than seeing her cry, well almost. "Kendall though, really?"
"Please let me explain. For the love of God, please I am begging you to let me explain," my voice is hoarse from the amount of force I'm putting into it. She mockingly laughs at me, not the same genuine beautiful life that brings joy to my ears. That alone let's me know she's done with it. She's done with me and my bullshit. Hell, anyone with the right mind would.
"No Harry. Enough. We had sex, and that's what you wanted. I'm not going to hold it against you. But if you have any decency in you, any, please go." She says through gritted teeth. It may be because I'm a stubborn fuck, but I am standing my damn ground.
Y/N's POV
It is taking everything within for me not to cry. The huge lump in my throat is hurting so bad but I am so sick of crying for Harry. That's all I ever do. After asking him to go, he still hasn't budged. Stubborn son of a bitch he is. What possibly more could Harry want? Wasn't it just a nail and bail?
"Harry," I press further. "I'm begging to let this go. Let me be happy. Along the way I will learn to forget you, and you will too. You'll eventually find yourself and what you want, enough is enough." My bottom lip quivers, voice becoming shaky. He bravely enough wraps his arm around my waist, pulling me in super close to his chest. I squirm, furiously move but his hold is too much for me.
Our foreheads press together and finally after battling a long battle deep inside myself, I break. Small sobs spill from my mouth and if I am not mistaken, he's crying too.
"Do you think I would do this to you? I love you so fucking much. Why the fuck would I choose Kendall over you?" He sniffles, his grip only getting tighter. That entrancing smell is getting to me, filling up my nostrils. I hate how much he weakens me. Not this time.
"You did it once." I remind him. Last night I was the happiest I had ever been in so long. The most beautiful thing that ever happened, and of course it was short lived. This was brought upon myself on my behalf. "You also used Sofia for sex, you did that once too." He winces when I mention his wrong doings to his face. "Let me go," I plea, "please Harry. I don't want to scream but I will if you don't let me go." My threat works and his grip loosens but not entirely.
"This is what I meant about us being a lost cause. Thank you for showing me what it was to be loved and made love to. Thank you for being my best friend before I fell in love with you and even after. Thank you for so many things Harry, but I'm done." Now noticing that the sky has grown dark, I back away from his hold. Wiping the final tears shed for Harry, I give him the weakest smile I can pull before turning and locking the door behind me. Breaking down into a crying mess, I slide down the door, hand over mouth. This is it, it's over.
Harry's POV
Hearing Y/N cry through the other side of the door makes me break with her too. She's broken, but fucking hell so am I. I slide my forehead down her door, tears spilling like I'm the biggest fucking baby in the world. I refuse to lose her. Destiny may not want us together but I don't give a single fuck.
Almost 15 minutes later, I can still hear her from the other side of the door. I know she can hear me too.
The wind starts picking up to a
sudden haste. Thunder strikes out of nowhere and there's a sudden down pour of water. It's chilly outside and all I have is my damn white shirt that is too thin. I shiver, though it's not enough for me to go. No thing Mother Nature throws at me is going to make me leave.
"Y/N, please let me in. Please don't do this," my voice is croaky and sore.
"You did this yourself Harry. I just want my liberty," she stifles her tears enough for me to hear her voice. "Go home. It's raining and it's cold outside, you'll get sick." Even like this, she still finds it in her heart to be caring. Caring for the biggest fuck up in the world.
With my forehead still pressed against the door, I'm heaving and the wind seems to be picking up. The cold water is hitting me but I could care less. "I am not going anywhere." My voice sounds more stern than I actually am.
"Suit yourself Harry. You are going to get sick." Never ceases to amaze me. How does she do it? If getting sick means that I stay here then so be it.
I huff, shaky breath and trembling from the cold, "then I'll get sick. I will stay here all night through this rain until you let me explain." I am so fucking cold but this is the kind of shit I am willing to do for her.
She's still crying but she scoffs, "you won't. I am not letting you in, stay out there for all I care." There's the contradiction. If it wasn't because I'm cold, it'd be funny. The things I do for Y/N. "I mean it Harry, stop wasting your time. I said I'm done."
"Then why are you still at the door?" I ask through chattering teeth. My hair and clothes are soaked from the wind and rain picking up. Thunder and lightning surrounding me. How the hell did Kendall even think that shit was okay? "I will stay here until you open the door."
"You're bluffing and I know it. If you want to be stupid and get yourself sick, fine by me. You can kiss my ass if you think I'm letting you in here." Knowing Y/N, she feels bad. I know she does. Her heart made of damn gold is much too kind to be spiteful. She's hurting but so am I. I am hurting because I keep hurting the love of my life. The woman I love with such an intensity. The woman I made love to last night and who loved every god damned second of it. We stay in silence for what seems an eternity.
The wind and rain have only picked up since and here I am on my ass, sitting on this wet floor for her to say something. That's when I come to terms that she's not there anymore.
"Y/N? Baby?" I call. No response. She's probably gone off to bed, but I wasn't bluffing when I said that sleeping here for the whole night was an option. That is exactly what I plan to do, even with this harsh weather. Even Mother Nature hates me.
Y/N's POV
He's not staying out there, I know he's not. Walking into my bedroom, I sit on my bed for a few minutes. What if Harry wasn't kidding? He could get sick. Not just the common flu and cold, but really sick. He won't stay through the night though. There is no way in hell he is. Here I am telling him that I'm done but also being worried sick about Harry's health.
By now, he should be gone now that I'm not there anymore. He gave up and went home. "Why Harry? Why can't I just fall out of love with you?" I mutter to myself. Level of crazy: 10. I let my body fall back onto the mattress, closing my eyes momentarily thinking about last night. Harry's hands exploring every little detail, my hands roaming through his hair and pressing his lower back to fill me in deeper.
In those moments, they were surreal but magical. It feels like a dream but it was real. A grin plays on my face but it soon fades remembering it was all a joke. This game is a never ending cycle and it is sickening. I just want things back to normal. Before I fell in love with him. Maybe all of this is punishment for falling in love with my best friend. Who became the man I am madly crazy about. What would my life be if I hadn't? Not as hectic.
I still remember the day I was sure of
my feelings for Harry. The day I ran out crying from his house because I couldn't take it anymore. It became inevitable, he became inevitable. I was falling for him, and fast.
Two months later, here I am with the biggest ache in my heart because I gave him my all, not exactly my purity, but he saw me in my most intimate. He saw my naked body and I saw his. We mingled and lost ourselves in each other. But that's all we will ever share, those beautiful moments that will live in my heart forever.
I undo my bed and quickly climb in, covering myself with it. My heart is heavy thinking Harry's still out there in the cold rain but I am positive he is or has went home. Breathing inward and outward, my eyes become heavy with sleep. It's only 9:30, but this day is exhausting all on its own. My eyelids close, drifting my state of mind into a deep sleep, with an aching heart and guilty mind.
...
My eyes flick open, light from outside being as bright as ever. I hadn't even noticed my window is open but the air is chilly and there's still some light rain outside. Groaning and moaning, it's 8:30. Not a morning person.
A recap of yesterday's events comes to mind but I push them away. It feels hazed and distant. Surprisingly, I didn't cry as much as I thought I would.
My whole body aches but from being so uncomfortable. The best sleep I got was when I woke up with Harry's arms around me. Harry. Shit, did he go home? For his sake, I hope he did. Harry's persistent but not stupid... Hopefully. I should at least check. Without giving it a second thought, I slip on my slippers and sprint towards downstairs straight to my door.
I unlock it, slowly opening it. My heart drops instantly when I see a trembling, pale body laying on my porch floor. He's sweating and his lips are almost blue. "Harry," I drop to my knees. He stayed, he fucking stayed out here.
"I'm c-cold," he stutters. Feeling his forehead, he's yet to have a fever.
"Are you kidding me? Harry do you have any idea how ridiculous you are? Jesus Christ." I wrap my arms around his, giving my body to his. "You could die of hyperthermia. Die. Does that not concern you?" I scold him. He's trembling like crazy. I need to get him inside and under warm covers.
"I'd rather die than to lose you for good," he says through chattering teeth. His clothes are soaked. The blood in my veins stop flowing for a second. He can't be serious.
"Don't say that you idiot. People love you. Come on, get up." I put my arms around his underarms, putting as much force to get him to his feet.
"But do you?" He asks weakly. His tone broken and raspy. I simply kiss his forehead, not wanting to respond to his question
He's heavy, too heavy for me. "Help me here," I groan. He's weak, barely able to stand. I hoist his arm around my shoulder, hauling him up to my room. He's coughing. Deep fear sets in thinking he's going to get sick, he is. Finally getting him to the bed, I plop him down and he groans, still shivering.
"I love you," he whispers. I don't answer him. He's probably delusional. Maybe. I lift his white shirt over his shirt over his head, discarding it on the floor, his shoes and socks right after.
"Hips up," I order. I unbutton his pants and tug them down his legs. Being flustered should be the last thing I should be. Not like I haven't seen Harry in his holy glory. He stays in his boxers only, bring the duvet over him, I remove my sweater, leaving me only in a spaghetti strap tank top. "I can't believe I'm doing this after I said I was done." Wrapping my arms around his body, he seems to visibly relax. His hollow breathing normalizes when I touch him.
His shaky hand grabs my chin lightly, making me look up to his beautiful green eyes. So captivating, so emerald and perfect, the way his facial features are. Though his lips are pale, still looking so full, they're kissable. "Marry me," wait, what? "Be my wife." Now I'm positive he's delusional. My heart speeds increasingly fast. Marry him? Harry just asked me to be his wife. Either he's serious or it's the illness getting to him.
"Harry you can't be serious, you're cynically out of it right now," I press my warm body more against his. Anything to get him to snap back to reality.
"I don't know what else to do to show you that I love you more than words can describe. I mean it when I say it. I don't care about any other girl but you. I want you and only you. Forever. Not Kendall, not anyone else. Marry me Y/N, be my wife." So much sincerity, so much confusion. We're both so young. A whole life ahead of us. How can we get married if we don't even know our future? Do I have a future with Harry? I can't even get a freaking present with him.
"Harry I-- we'll talk when you're feeling better but for now rest. I'll warm you up some tea. When I come back, I'll lay with you." I let go of his body but he pulls me back in.
"I will always love you, even when you don't believe me. One day you'll be my wife and we'll end our nightmares together," hating to admit that his words are leaving me in awe. Harry's never spoken like this, sick or not.
Not replying, I push his damp hair away from his forehead. I stand, covering him up good. The whole flight downstairs, his words echo like
a yell in an empty room. He clung on to me as if it were for dear life. And for the first time, maybe there is an actual possibility that Harry does love me and he's been telling the truth.
He wants me to marry him, be with him for the rest of our lives. In another situation, there'd be no hesitation, no holding back. My heart fluttered hearing him say that. I can't give in all that simple though. There's still too much to fix, too much to discuss. Though for now, keeping Harry alive is my main priority. He saved my life, it's my turn to save his. Sometimes, it just all seems like a fight is better black and white.
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Double update. Sorry for it being so late. Enjoy xx