Chapter 18

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The pressure in my chest has vanished, just like that. Little droplets of tears fall down my cheeks as I stare straight into the eyes of my best friend, whom I just admitted to loving in front of him, right where he stands. I examine his face for any sort of reaction, but it's all blank. I can't read him, not like I usually can.

"Harry," I whisper lowly. He blinks a few times, and I'm not sure if it's because he doesn't know what to say. My heart begins to ache at the thought that he might burst and tell me off and laugh at how ridiculous I am.

"I'm sorry, I think I heard wrong," he says nonchalantly. "I did hear wrong, right?" His eyes scan my face, waiting for me to say 'gotcha'. I hear the sudden panic in his voice when he comes to realization that he did in fact hear right. I shake my head slowly, biting down on my lip. I'm trembling with fear, my whole body's frozen. My feet are planted on the ground and I can't move my gaze away from Harry.

"When did this... How?" He says in disbelief. I can feel Liam's presence now standing next to me. This couldn't be any worse of a timing to finally admit my feelings to Harry. In the end it all came down to this. This has all been a test on how much I can take, and it kicked my ass.

"When you came back, and I saw you with her. I didn't know what it was at first, jealousy maybe. It just irked me that she was with you. I tried everything I could to avoid this feeling, but every time I tried staying away from you it just kept on growing." I bite down on the inside of my mouth to prevent any further tears from spilling, but to my avail, it's not working.

"I didn't mean to Harry, I didn't but.." I'm left without anything else to say. I didn't know it'd be this easy and this hard to finally end all that's been killing me inside, slowly.

"How can you say you love me, when just two days ago you were kissing Liam?" He questions. Not giving away anything from the stare in his eyes, but his tone is a bit harsh and monotone at the same time. He really can't be serious, how many warnings and signals did I have to give for this stupid idiot to finally realize I am truly, madly, deeply in love with him, and only him.

"Mate, no look, Y/N and I were very intoxicated. I kissed her too, don't take it out on her," Liam defends me. How can he possibly still defend me after all of this? I would've ran for the hills if I were him, but he's too sweet.

"Harry-" I begin but he interrupts me.

"Fuck Y/N," he says frustrated, running his hand through his thick hair. "Why now? This puts me in a fucked up situation. What am I supposed to do?"

"Nothing Harry. You wanted to know

why I started acting so weird around you and now you know. It's not like I'm asking you to leave Kendall, I just needed to tell you what's been killing me slowly this whole time," my voice croaks.

I can feel tiny drops of rain starting to fall from the sky. I hadn't noticed how bad I was trembling till Liam started rubbing my arm to calm me down.

"You knew about this Liam?" Harry's attention turns away from me.

Liam nods his head, the guiltiness clearly etched on his face. Harry's tone is filled with hurt, and confusion. Why though?

Harry breathes out a big puff of air, as he puts his hands on his sides.

"Are you sure you're really... In love with me?" He struggles saying the last words.

"We kissed, didn't we?" I say wiping tears away with my hands.

"Y/N," he says softly, bringing his hand up but quickly putting back down. "I..," his soft eyes looking at me.

"I have to go Y/N, I'm sorry this is all too much ."

"Harry please don't leave," my voice cracks. Full on sobs start coming out of me as he begins to turn around and back away. My heart is torn that after all I have been through it came down to this. I knew this would happen, I just never expected to feel this hurt.

The wheels of his car screech against the concrete and he drives away. Heavy rain begins to suddenly fall from the sky, but I don't realize it. I just told Harry everything and he walked away.

"Lets go inside," Liam whispers wrapping his arm around me, turning us to head back inside.

...

Harry's POV

As I drive back, all I'm thinking is what the fuck just happened?

I went over there to clear this up and find out what's really going on, and then that hit me. How did my best friend fall in love with me?

I walked away because I didn't know what to say or do. It broke me seeing her that broken, has it been that bad? She should've told me the second she started feeling something. Yet again what do I know, admitting things like that isn't easy.

When we kissed yesterday, I felt something. Not only did I want to keep kissing her, but I wanted to make love to her.

It's fucked up I know, I just can't help this feeling I have whenever I see her. The way she makes my heart beat rapidly fast, it's insane. She's driving me crazy, and I'm a dick for just walking away like that when she admitted something so big to me like that.

And the more crazier thing is, I think I'm starting to fall for her..

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