Chuck ended up not coming to my show because her flight got delayed and she won't be able to leave until tomorrow. Last nights show was awesome, it was hard to not think about Francesco..but I just flipped my switch and sang my heart out. He's suppose to call me tonight but it's 9:30 and he hasn't so.
I just got back to my hotel room, Blake is suppose to come over so I can talk to him. I just need to let him know that we're just friends. But not in a rude way, because I care about his feelings and he's been my friend for a while. Still no call from Francesco. The door knocks and I take a deep breath dreading this conversation.
"Hey" I said smiling and letting him in. "Hey." I sit on my bed and he sits on the one across from mine. He just stares at me and doesn't say anything. "For not being mad at me you kinda seem mad." I said laughing. "I'm not mad. Just confused. What did you want to talk about."
"Well I just wanted to say that I'm lucky to have you as a friend, you always make sure I'm okay and keep me smiling. And I want you to know that I care about your feelings and I don't want to upset you but I'm with Francesco and I'm really happy with that." I said.
"Okay and that's fine but this whole time I've known you you've never said you didn't have feelings for me, you've said you're engaged and you're happy but you've never denied it." "Yes I have, a couple of times."
"When? Name one time you've said that." Blake said. I open my mouth but nothing comes out,then I close it and just sit there. I guess I haven't, but I've meant to, I just never want to hurt his feelings.... I think..
"You haven't, because wrong or not, you do feel something." Blake said standing up, walking up to me and holding my face while kissing me, he gets on top of me and I lay back on the bed, we make out for a minute then he reaches down my pants, I put my hand on his stopping him then he says "Just tell me if you don't want this." I move my hand then my phone rings. I look at it and Francesco is calling me "it's Francesco.." I said. Blake gets up then says "I'll text you ok?" "Okay.....bye." I replied.
Blake leaves and I answer the phone "Where the fuck have you been!" I said almost bursting in tears because of what just happened and I was sort of blaming Francesco even though I shouldn't be. "What do you mean?!! Babe why are you so mad?" Francesco says. "Why am so mad?? I don't know maybe because you haven't talked to me in three and a half days!! Maybe that's why!"
"I can't always text and call you! I'm working too,I've been really busy!" "Did I tell you to always text or call me?? No. Just a simple goodnight or I love you would be fine. This is exactly what Barrie did and you're scaring me! I thought you knew how much that affected me and would never do that."
"Okay I am nothing like Barrie! I'm really sorry babe that I didn't talk to you for three days, it's not going to happen again." "Yeah well I hope it doesn't, because one of these days I'm going to get lonely."
"What does that mean?!?!!" Francesco said. "It means people are vulnerable when they're lonely and being ignored." I replied then hung up. I can't deal with this right now. He sounds exactly like Barrie. They act like its so hard to send a simple text.
He calls me again and I put my phone on silent and throw it on the other bed. I can't believe what just happened with Blake, now I have to deal with that too. I can't believe Blake and I made out...and almost other things. I was just mad about Francesco. And then there was Blake who's always been on the road with me and takes care of me...I feel really bad now because I'm leading him on.
-Blakes POV-
Wow. It actually happened, I kissed Lana. I never thought it would happen...it was everything I thought it would be. God she's so beautiful. We almost...were going to...do it, I think. But we got interrupted, by of course, oddly enough, Francesco.
I told her to stop me if she didn't want to do it and she moved her hand from mine, which meant she wanted me to..I wish we hadn't got interrupted, I would do anything to hook up with Lana but not just hook up, I really want to be with her, hopefully she'll still want to do it when I see her again. I know she's with Francesco and maybe it's wrong, well I know it is, but it doesn't feel wrong, it feels right, I would take care of her like no one has before.
-Lanas POV-
I'm about to go to sleep when Francesco calls me again. "What." I answer so he'll leave me alone for the night. "Babe listen, I'm sorry, I don't want you to think that I'm going to do what Barrie did, because I'm not, I just had a busy few days. What you said about getting lonely and vulnerable worried me, I miss you and I love you."
"It's just not like you. You at least text me. But I forgive you...and I love you too." "No one said this will be easy but me and you will make it, ok? As long as we stay in touch and of course, stay faithful." Francesco said like he thinks I'm fooling around, even though I kind of did... "Ok. I'll text you tomorrow. Night babe." "Goodnight, I love you!" I laugh then say "I love you too."
He better text me back tomorrow. God today has been crazy.