summary
in the wake of paticularly bad case, tony exhibits signs of ptsd and gibbs realises what has to be done
relationships
none
cast
michael weatherly as senior special agent anthony dinozzo
mark harmon as special agent in charge leroy jethro gibbs
richard dean anderson as major general jack o'neill
amanda tapping as colonel sam carter
michael shanks as doctor daniel jackson
joe flanigan as lt colonel john sheppard
david hewlett as doctor rodney mckay
fandoms
stargate series
ncis
—
During Tony's stint as Agent Afloat, officially he was stationed on the USS Ronald Reagan and the USS Seahawk in the north Atlantic Ocean when in fact he was actually stationed on the Lost City of Atlantis, a sentient City created by a race known to have build the Stargate - the Alterrans as Atlantis would call their ancestors, her former occupants and creators - in the Pegasus Galaxy. He did a 9-month tour, and reluctantly returned to earth when Director Vance wanted to return DiNozzo to Washington for reasons Tony didn't know. So, Tony packed up his things, said goodbye to the marines and the scientists he'd gained the respect of and returned to earth with a heavy heart and an emptiness in his mind where the music of Atlantis usually sang beautifully in his mind. Of course his time on Atlantis hadn't been all fun and games and after a particularly rough case Tony began to exhibit signs of PTSD and nobody knew why.
They'd been at the office for two days trying to find the kidnapped child of Marine Major John Argent and had been sleeping at the office the first time Tony had a flashback. He wasn't sure what triggered it, but he'd been arguing with Ziva when he suddenly found himself staring Kolya in the face and attacking Ziva.
"Your death will cause the colonel pain..."
"Tony!..."
"You son of a bitch...!"
"It's over, Agent DiNozzo."
"It will never be over."
"Tony! We came to rescue you!"
"About damn time, McKay!"
"...tony!"
"Tony!"
"TONY!" He snapped out of it, and his voice was hoarse from screaming apparently and there were two strong arms wrapped around his waist and Ziva was rubbing her neck and actually looking afraid of him, ducked behind McGee.
"Oh god." Tony yanked himself out of Gibbs' grip with wide eyes. "Ziva, i-i'm so sorry."
"What the hell happened Tony?" McGee demanded and Tony gulped, flinching back violently when Gibbs and McGee tried to get closer. Tony could feel all eyes on him from everyone in the bullpen, which is understandable since he just tried to choke out another agent seemingly unprovoked. Tony didn't have an answer for anyone and shoved past Gibbs and McGee before anyone could react he was gone.
It was almost an hour later that they found Tony sitting under a table in Abby's lab. Gibbs wasn't surprised that Abby had kept him hidden from them - she hadn't been all too happy with Gibbs when she'd found out he'd forced the matter of Tony returning to his team, knowing the man had been happy and at ease there. She'd done a consult there week 3 into his assignment, and had been in awe of the city and how happy Tony was there.
"What's going on, DiNozzo?" Gibbs crouched down in front of Tony, who was messing about with a small star trek insignia badge that Gibbs had seen pinned onto his go-bag or suit jacket. Gibbs had noticed Abby always had a badge on whatever lab coat or outfit she was wearing that she had when she'd returned from the TDA.
"I have PTSD." Tony finally explained, still not looking at Gibbs. "While i was away, i was loaned out to a highly top secret base to act as the liaison between the civilians and the military. It was an opportunity i would have regretted passing up. Abby did that consult for me there, when she was gone 3 weeks. Anyway, during a mission my team and i were kidnapped and tortured by this group of crazy bastards. We were POW 9 days before they got us out." Gibbs eyed his SFA for a minute. "I had two violent outbursts before Doctor Beckett diagnosed me about 2 weeks after the rescue."
"What's with the pin?"
"Rodney gave it to me." Tony chuckled lightly, closing his fist around the pin. "Anyone he liked, he gave them a pin from this massive collection he had. I got the Star fleet badge, Doc Z got a cartoon smiley face, Shep got a lightning bolt. Even Ev got one, a paintbrush. He gave Abby the Dracula one, said he liked her gall and style. Several others have them as well. He gave it to me while i was in the infirmary after his team rescued us."
"You miss them." It was a statement, not a question. Gibbs was just starting to realize he never should have fought to get Tony to come home. Because Washington DC wasn't his home anymore. But he'd been too blind in wanting to bring his family back together that he hadn't stopped to think that his team had made other family, had other needs over his.
"More than anything in the world." And Gibbs vowed to make things right, would do whatever it took.
The next few months were particularly rough for Tony. During a case Gibbs and Abby made a shocking discovery that McGee and Ziva had turned off the comms, which had sent Tony spiralling into a PTSD flashback, and Gibbs immediately made a call to a number that had taken ages to get.
"Hello?"
"General O'Neill. I'm sorry to call your personal number but i didn't think you'd take my call otherwise."
"Speaking?" Gibbs chuckled.
"Special Agent Gibbs, Sir. I'm about Agent DiNozzo."
"What's that crazy son of a bitch done?" Jack asked with an eye roll that Gibbs could just hear.
"It's not what he's done, but rather what he's going to do if i don't get him out of DC asap."
"I'm listening." Usually Gibbs fought for his people, the scuttlebutt made that very clear, so for Jack to hear him say he wants Tony out of DC he had to admit he was intrigued.
"6 days ago two of my agents were suspended following disciplinary action after turning off the comms while Agent DiNozzo was investigating a terror cell in a small suburban area." Jack was angry. Who the hell abandoned an agent in the field like that? "Following that Agent DiNozzo had a PTSD induced flashback and almost killed himself and injured 4 fellow agents who tried to restrain him, to which i had to put him in a 72-hour psych hold for his own safety. They put him on some seriously strong medication, and he's on Medical Leave right now pending a psych eval. He's currently asleep in my spare bed, an unfortunate side effect of the medication makes him tired constantly. I also have the 3 agents threatening to quit unless they get transferred out of DC as well as my forensic scientist and assistant medical examiner."
"I see." Jack looked through his massive stack of paperwork and sighed. "Gibbs. Tell DiNozzo he's to march his butt over to my office today. Tomorrow, you and your scientist and M.E march your butts over to my office with the personnel files of any agent you think would be good on this team i've been working on."
"Yes sir."
Tony knocked on the door to General O'Neill's office, opening the door and smiling politely at the General.
"General."
"Call me Jack." Tony startled, but sat down warily in the chair opposite O'Neill. He wasn't dressed like he usually was, old worn - though clearly designer - jeans and black trainers and a tight t-shirt with an OSU logo and an OSU hoodie. "Listen, i got a rather interesting call from your boss."
"Which one?" Tony asked warily, because depending on who this conversation could go two ways.
"Gibbs." Tony nodded, relaxed slightly. "I'm building a team for Atlantis, when we send them back to Pegasus. I want you to lead it."
"What?" Tony's voice was strangled, and Jack sighed and leant back in his chair.
"Gibbs told me what happened at NCIS last week."
"Oh."
"I have candidates from ATF, FBI, CIA, NYPD, NCIS and METRO PD for this team." Jack listed boredly. "But i want you to lead it."
"A-are you sure?" Tony asked, and Jack felt pained at how hesitant Tony sounded.
"Never been more sure in my life." Jack replied easily.
"Uhm, okay." Tony decided. "Okay, i'll do it."
PTSD never gets better, it never goes away. But sometimes being around the people that showed they cared in every way they could was the most important thing. It stopped you slipping, it stopped you regretting.
—
authors note
in a real bad mind place again and i fucking hate it