The Binding String

T H I R T Y - E I G H T

A single spark of doubt is enough to ignite fire of misunderstanding 

Ishita didn't know how to react to the message she received on her mobile phone, it could not be some random message and it's impossible for her to ignore it especially when the layers of his betrayal and lies are still separating them, when Raman still didn't disclose the truth behind his controversial past. Ishita had taken a leap of faith with him, she just trusted him and decided to start a new life but how can she forget that a successful marriage doesn't build on the base of lies and secrets. How can she forget those sleepless nights and endless tears she cried with the mere thought of her life without Raman but whom she is supposed to tell the same? 

Her marriage was never a path of roses; they hardly tried to live a peaceful life together when they're married and all the attempts they tried to make the marriage work ended up on a sore note. They actually never tried to understand the fragility of relationship between husband and wife when they're married nor tried to make it better. Ishita was one who clearly refused to make compromise years back stating a marriage cannot be bloom on the foundation of compromises and now she was so desperate to make her relationship work with Raman that she almost overlooked his deeds and somewhere gave him an impression that she forgot him. Ishita contradicted her own theories and beliefs for the man who not only rejected her in the past but humiliated her in public, taunted her for faithfulness and gave her the pain she never deserved. His past is like a boomerang, it is meant to cross their ways again and again and she is helpless to stop it. 

The strong independent lady like Ishita is helpless in front of it.

She was never so vulnerable and helpless as she is now, she was never so much emotionally attached with him as she is now. She doesn't know why but she was scared to inquire about the source of the unknown message because she was scared to lose him this time.

She didn't want to lose him, she was not ready for it. The mere message brought all the nightmarish nights she spent when he was away from her for six months and after that. Ishita looked at her reflection in the mirror of the vanity table wondering if she looked the same at the beginning of night? Her room was romantically decorated with the scented candles around and she wore peach lingerie today, took hours to make herself beautiful for him, the hazel eyes which she filled with kohl a few hours back were washed along with tears which were uncontrollably flowing down from her eyes. Ishita wasn't in the state to understand anything except a thought of running away from the present situation. She fetched the fresh pair of clothes from the closet and dashed inside the washroom to change into the same. She took another shower and rubbed off his favourite scent she applied on her body a few hours back. Ishita came back from the washroom dressed in usual shots and rugged t-shirt and blew off all the candles and immediately went into Roohi's room and carried her back in her bedroom. She needed someone's comforting hug today and Roohi is her solace now. She was scared today, scared from her past which pained her a lot, maybe a sleep and a hug would help her. Ishita kissed Roohi's head lovingly and hugged her close to her heart. 

"Your Mumma is scared Roohi. Please be with me." Ishita murmured to herself cocooning her little daughter in her arms. She hoped sleep could relieve her restless heart but she didn't get a wink of same and she remained laid awake on her bed taking sleeping Roohi in her arms. A corner of her heart was expecting her husband to return back at the same time he informed her earlier or a call from him to inform about his whereabouts for the night but nothing came from his side.

"Maybe I'm thinking a lot. Raman never made such promises to me in the past and he is actually trying to change. I should keep my faith intact." Ishita consoled herself as two hours passed without any sign of her husband.