Similar Differences (Harry Styles Fanfiction) (CURRENTLY EDITING)

Chapter 37

~A/N~

This is Harry's POV of last chapter, just so it doesn't confuse anyone.

Harry's POV

My feet led me back to that river outside of the library. I really enjoyed the isolated atmosphere there, and I needed to set everything straight in my head. The only way I could do that was by getting away from everyone. I didn't know why everything was rushing back at me so hard once again, but I honestly couldn't face it another time around. So, I concluded that I had two options.

I could keep pushing, try to get better, and do something good with my life.

But then probably crash and burn.

Or I could quit. Take some pills or something, and just wait for everything to stop. Maybe it was an easy way out, and maybe it would prevent me from ever getting better. But I've dealt with this for years only for things to seem okay for a month or so and then go crashing back down, usually even worse than before. So was I going to kill myself?

Not today, no. I wasn't ready yet. I needed to write some things out, plan everything, and say what I wanted to say to people. This wouldn't be the way I'd want to leave.

My thinking was then interrupted by a noise from behind me. Startled, I turned and saw Bethany there, wide-eyed.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I shouted at her. Why did she have to get involved? I wanted to be alone for once.

"What are you doing here?" she countered. So argumentative...

I gave her a dirty look and returned my view to the splashing water, trying not to say something I knew I'd regret.

What I wanted to say was, "Get the hell off my back and stop trying to shove your pity act at me to make yourself feel better, bitch."

But, I kept it inside, which isn't common for me to do when I'm pissed off.

"Stop pushing me away." She murmured suddenly. But then she began to raise her voice. "I stick around despite your rude act, I obviously want to be here for you. Why won't you let me?"

I wished I could light up my thoughts on a movie theater screen and show them to her, but I couldn't. I just...couldn't.

'She really doesn't care. You know that. She just feels sorry for you, but you don't even deserve this attention from her." my mind told me. I leaned against a larger rock behind me, because I was growing a bit dizzy.

"You can't keep doing this."she said in an angry tone. Her words brought something back that I'd seen in my sleep for years but had only recentlybeen getting more and more vivid in my mind when I was awake.

"You can't keep doing this! You're hurting me! And him! Please!" she screamed, trying to push him away.

"You don't have any say in what I do, damn it!" He roughly grabbed her neck and shoved her against the wall.

Why is he hurting mummy?

"You're the skank that's still with that dumbass while you fuck around with me! Make up your mind!"

Her face was bright red as she gasped for air.

"I can't breathe...please!" she choked out.

"Stop! She's choking!" I shouted from the living room. I didn't mean to say it, but it slipped out.

"You." he said and turned around to me. "You fucking piece of shit!"