The Girl in the Mirror 2 (Harry Styles fanfic)

Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Sienna's POV

Flashback

I stare at the instructions in my hands, trying to understand exactly what I need to do. My stomach does somersaults, realising the results of this test could change everything. It could change my entire life, it could change his life too. It doesn't feel real, it all feels surreal. How is this even happening? How is this even a possibility? There is no way I can be pregnant! It just isn't even possible. There is something though, call it woman's intuition or whatever, something is telling me I am. There is a feeling I have inside that is telling me I am pregnant. The sickness in the morning and the missed period were the first signs. I think I got the idea in my head then and now a part of me is convinced I am pregnant. There is a logical side of me though, telling me this is crazy. The doctors told me I couldn't have children, so I'm not sure why I am thinking that I can now.
I'm sure the pregnancy test I am about to do will tell me this is a false alarm, but deep down I don't think I will be happy with that. There is a part of me that wants to be pregnant and any other scenario would be disappointing. I suppose when you have been told you can never have children, if there is ever a small chance you are you are going to want to be. The thing is though I've never been one of these careless women. I've never experienced the possibility of ever maybe being pregnant or thinking I was. I have always been safe and I have always taken precautions to avoid that sort of thing. The only reason I stopped my birth control was because I was told I couldn't have kids. There wasn't any point in taken it then, well that's what I thought. That's what the doctors made me believe.
It takes a matter of seconds to pee on the white stick, I place the test on the side in my LA bathroom. I have to deal with this alone and it makes me feel sad. I never thought when I was younger that I would be doing this alone, I thought I would be sharing it with someone special. I thought I would be in a happy loving relationship and we would be planning this together, both excited at the new life we could have potentially created. In reality I am alone, sat on the toilet with the lid down waiting for the test to develop. It's strange how life turns out in the end. I wait patiently thinking about how this could all change my life. I'm not ready to be a mum, I haven't planned this or even thought about it. I have to take what life throws at me and I can't help thinking perhaps this is my time. Perhaps this is my reason to be better and to get better. This could be the awakening I need to leave behind all the addictions and be the person I have always wanted to be.
I start to tap my fingers on the side, too nervous to look at the test. I can't help thinking this is what I need to turn my life around and to see that love does exist. I could finally have the ability to truly love someone, without being selfish and they could love me. They would love me no matter what I did, because I'm their mum. I carried them for 9 months and I nurtured them into a healthy human being. I finally pluck up the courage to look at the test and check the results. I stand up and I pick the test up, looking at the results. My heart races as I see two lines appear on the test and I quickly check the leaflet, finding out what the results mean. What does two lines mean? I let out a delirious laugh and I cover my mouth with my spare hand. The smile has spread across my face, as the instructions show two lines means you're pregnant. I'm pregnant, the test says I am pregnant. I start to cry, not out of sadness or fear. I cry because this feels right, I feel happy. I am having a baby, I am going to be a mother.

End of Flashback

I stare at Liam, sitting beside me and I allow my words to register with him. I have dropped a huge bombshell, something he was never expecting, so I allow him time to digest it. I'm not sure how he will take the news, it's a lot to take in when I have just come back as well. I have surprised him enough for one day. I wait for him to say something, but he doesn't. I'm not sure how I expected him to react, I suppose I just wanted a bit more than nothing from him. I haven't even told Niall yet, I wanted Liam to be the first person to know. I would have liked to have confided in Niall first, but I knew Liam should have been the first to know. The only other person who knows is my doctor back in LA, who did my 12 weeks scan. He's very trustworthy and expensive, so I knew the news wouldn't be spread or leaked by him.