The Girl in the Mirror 2 (Harry Styles fanfic)

Chapter 40

Chapter 40

Harry's POV

I stare at her as I stay sat broken on the cold hard floor and I replay her words over and over again in my head. I don't speak and neither does she. We just stare at each other and she waits for me to acknowledge what she's just said. I've no clue what to say to her because I still can't even take in what she's saying. There's already been so much going on over the last few days, far too much for one person to take and her being here now is the last thing I need. She's the last person I want or need here causing more trouble and creating more problems. I shouldn't have to deal with this. I should be focused fully on Sienna; she's the one that needs all of my attention.

'Louis knows about us.'

'Louis knows about us.'

'Louis knows about us.'

I repeat her words over and over in my head, but it doesn't matter how many times I repeat them I can't seem to register and accept what she's telling me. She keeps staring at me, trying to force me to speak, but I'm too confused and exhausted to say anything. Where would I even begin?

She sweeps her messy brown hair out of her face and she tucks her hair behind her ears. Her hands inevitably move to rest on her growing baby bump, where my baby is growing. My baby is growing inside her, time going by and nearing her due date. I'm having a baby with her, I've created a life with someone I've known for years. I'm having a baby with my once best friend's wife and the love of my life's best female friend. I'm having a baby with Eleanor, the woman I've known for years. The woman who I watched marry Louis, when I was the best man. It only seems like yesterday all of that happened. I still remember watching them say their vows and wishing them a lifetime of happiness together. I never thought we'd end up here, never in a million years.

I can only seem to start registering what's happened now that she's standing here in front of me. Her ringing and texting me the news didn't seem completely real until now. It makes me think of all the lies I've told, the deceit and betrayal. All those things are all real now that she's here with her pregnant belly.

"Harry" she says firmly "You need to talk to me, I need to know what you're thinking."

I don't know what she's expecting from me or what she even wants me to say to her. Does she expect me to jump up and pat her on the back for ruining my life? Does she want me to hug her and tell her it'll all be okay? It isn't going to be okay, nothing will ever be okay again.

My life is falling apart, crashing down into flames piece by piece and all she's doing is causing more destruction and more pain. It'll only be a small amount of time now before the news starts to break and it starts to spread around the world. What will people think of me then, when they see how far my deceit has spread? Everyone will finally see me for the monster I really am and I'm not ready for that.

I've got to think about Sienna though because I don't want her waking up to all of this. If she's going to be okay she doesn't need any extra hurt or upset. I don't want her to have to deal with this shit, even though I caused it. Why can't everything just be okay? Why do I always manage to fuck things up? I know this time though is beyond anything I've done before, this is the biggest betrayal in Sienna and mines history.

"Harry!" Eleanor snaps, dragging me from my thoughts.

I stare at her, standing there with her hands on her hips and an angry glare on her face. I feel like I'm back at school, being scolded off a school teacher for not listening with the way she's looking at me.

"Did you hear me?" she asks.

Of course I heard her, I heard every fucking word she said and I wish I hadn't. I wish she hadn't spoken at all.

"Yes" I answer weakly.

She nods accepting I've heard her and she turns to look away from me. She stands there breathing loudly, irritating me as her breathing gets heavier. I've always been irritated by the little things she does, like heavy breathing and the chewing noise she makes when she eats. It was okay before though because I wasn't with her, it was Louis' problem not mine. I could live with it back then, but now I can't hear anything else except for her incisive loud breathing. Does she realise how annoying she is?