From The Dining Table [H.S]

Chapter 61:

After I told Mitch all about my night and morning with Townes, we went inside and to bed.

The next week we finished recording. I told them I needed to take a break from writing for a week or two so I could come back and finish up a few more songs.

Everyone agreed our time in Jamaica had come to a good enough end. We planned to meet at a recording studio in LA in a week and a half. Which was good for me. It gave me enough time to take a break from everything.

The flight home was long and lonesome. I didn't like flying alone. My mind was always drifting to Nikki. I couldn't stop thinking of her. She made me so happy. I shouldn't have broken it off with her.

I don't think I will ever be truly happy without her. She makes me me. She makes me want to be better and she was the only one who could calm me down when I was pissed. That had to mean something right?

The press already caught wind of our breakup after Nikki had deleted pictures of us and any tweet she made about me. My management deleted all the pictures from my accounts too.

But I still had all the pictures, posted and not posted, on my phone. As much as it hurt, I kept scrolling through them to take up the time spent on the plane. Every picture of us together enjoying our lives and kissing and having fun hurt me just a little more every time.

It ran through my head that I could go back to her. It went through my head many many times the past few weeks. But after the thought, I always was scared she'd tell me no. She would tell me to fuck off. Which, I would deserve.

I felt I needed some closure. I don't know why I'm the one needed closure. I was the one who broke up with her. I just needed to see her again.

That meant looking her up everyday to see if there was any stories about her going out with friends, or going anywhere. I needed to see her in whatever way I could. But I knew I couldn't see her in person.

I had told Mitch, who had eventually asked Sarah to be his girlfriend and were now happily dating, that I was thinking a lot about Nikki. He suggested when I go back to LA to call Townes and go out with her a few times. If not her another girl to get my mind off Nikki.

Which made sense because when I was with Townes the first time, my mind rarely went to Nikki. So maybe he was right, maybe Townes was a way to forget about Nikki and I needed that the most right now.

The plane lands and I text Townes:

New Text Message to Townes:
Me: Hey! It's Harry from Jamaica. I just got back to LA and want to know if you would want to get some coffee or dinner with me?

I put my phone away and get off the plane, get my bags, get into a car and head towards my house. Townes messages me back fairly quickly.

New Text Message from Townes:
Townes: Hey Harry! I would love to get some coffee with you! When are you free?
Me: I'm free whenever
Townes: How's tomorrow morning?
Me: Perfect! Meet at The C Bean at 9?
Townes: Alright! See you then

I put away my phone and arrive at my house. I tip my driver and grab my bags and walk inside. It felt colder than normal.

I drop my bags at the door and grab a beer before leaning against the wall. I look down at my shoes, feeling sorry for myself for some reason.

I check my phone. It was 11:28pm. I pull up Nikki's contact and almost press call. I shake my head and put my phone away. I needed to focus on Townes instead. I can't think about Nikki anymore. I look up and at the wall across from me is Nikki and I's engagement picture framed.

I furrow my eyebrows, never seeing this before. I notice a sticky note in the bottom corner and I pull it off and read it:

H,
I'm so excited to get to call you my husband soon. I thought this would go well here so you can see it all the time and think of me. I love you babe.
N

I frown and look at the picture. It's funny how happy we look with each other when that day we were angry. I feel a warm tear drip down my cheek and I wipe it away, sniffing.

I take the picture off the wall and walk into the kitchen and put it on the table. I look down at it, some anger rising inside me.

Without thinking, I punch the picture, sending glass across the table and onto the floor. My knuckles were bleeding but I didn't care.

I let my head fall backwards as I let out an angry, yet helpless yell. I pick up the picture and throw it to the ground, shattering it even more.

I wipe my eyes, as tears freely streamed down. I shake my head, gathering myself and taking a few deep breaths. I picked up the picture which was face down on the floor. I didn't look at it, I didn't want to be mad anymore.

I throw it in the trash. I grab the broom and sweep up the glass from the floor and toss it in the trash before I wrap it up and throw it in the trash can outside.

I walk upstairs and take off all my clothes, laying in bed. I sigh before closing my eyes and falling asleep.