From The Dining Table [H.S]

Chapter 53:

*Three weeks later*
We had most of the album written and some songs recorded. We had actually a lot of songs written and recorded. I knew I didn't want a long ass album, just a few of my favorite songs.

"Have you thought about a single for the album?" asks Tyler, as we sat in the studio. It was just us and Mitch, the guitarist who came for us.

Mitch and I got along really well. He co-wrote most of the songs and he's beyond a genius when it comes to music. I'm very happy that he is able to work on this album with me.

Mitch and I were sat fairly close to one another and Tyler was sitting in a chair across from us.

"I like Only Angel" suggests Tyler. But I wasn't feeling Only Angel to be a single.

"I like that one" I tell him, "But I feel it isn't right. What I felt from the first note we wrote was Sign of the Times" I say and Mitch nods his head. "See, he agrees."

Tyler nods and scribbles something down on a piece of paper, "Yeah I agree. It's a good one and it really shows off your vocals" he says. I nod in agreement.

Before anyone else could speak, Jeff comes into the room with a phone in his hand, covering the part you talk into, "Harry, it's for you" he says.

I shake my head and lean into Mitch a little, "No, tell whoever it is that I'm trying to focus without any distractions" I say and I feel Mitch shift a little against my side. He moves his arm out from being laid on by me and wraps it around my shoulders.

Jeff shakes his head, "It's important" he says and his face looks serious and almost scared, making me a little anxious and I worry about my mom and if everything is okay with her.

"Did someone die? Is everyone okay?"

He shakes his head, "No one died... but if you don't take this call I'm scared you might" he says and holds the phone out to me.

I groan, sitting up from Mitch and I stand up. I grab the phone and roll my eyes before pressing it against my ear, "Hello?"

"Where the hell are you?!" I head a familiar voice say. It was Nikki and she didn't sound happy.

I felt guilty not telling her I was hear and not picking up my phone for the past three weeks. I felt guilty not even really thinking about her and only about myself.

"Hey" I say, dragging out the end.

"Answer my question, Harry" she says, not sounding happy at all. She sounds pissed.

"Jamaica."

I hear her groan, "How long have you been there? You've literally went off the radar. No one knows where you are! I couldn't get a hold of you, I called your mom and she doesn't know where you are, I tried calling your manager about five hundred times and she never answered! I had to go to her house and demand to know where you were! I've been so worried about you!"

She sounds like she's about to cry, making me feel even worse. As she's been talking, I walked out of the studio and outside to get some privacy.

"Nikki, I'm sorry" is all I can come up with. There's silence for a moment or two before she continues to speak.

"Why are you in Jamaica?"

"I'm recording."

"For Dunkirk still?"

I shake my head, feeling terrible I didn't at least let her know, "No, music."

More silence. "Why didn't you tell me?"

I sigh, rubbing my forehead, "I don't know. I just was excited to get back to writing and recording I was just ready for this. And I didn't want any distractions."

"So now I'm a distraction for you" she says, and I can hear her sniff, meaning she was crying.

"Not a bad one! If I kept talking to you and all, I wouldn't have you off my mind. You'd be all I could think about. And I need to be able to focus on my music" I tell her, "I figure you would understand."

"And a text would've hurt you?"

I shake my head, she's making me feel so terrible. "No a text wouldn't have hurt."

No one said anything for a couple minutes, nothing of us feeling terrible. "Look I'm so sorry, Nikki. I really am. I shouldn't have thought only about me. I should've-"

"Save it" she says, cutting me off before the line goes dead. I sigh, shaking my head. I look out at the water that was under the bridge I was on.

I just needed to clear my head so I put the phone on the railing.  I hop over the railing and take a small fall to the water below.

I close my eyes as I hit the water and let my muscles relax as my body slowly sunk down. Just before I was out of breath, I opened my eyes and swam up to the surface.

I rolled onto my back and lay there floating lightly on the top of the water. I look up at the sky which was dark and the stars were very visible.

The water was refreshing. It was cold but not bone chilling. It was very relaxing.

I felt a peaceful calm as I stared into space. But then the thought of my previous conversation with Nikki comes slowly back into my head.

I flip around and swim under water and around to the beach where I walk out. I run my hands over my face, swiping away the water before I run my hand through my hair, pushing it back.

I walk back to over the bridge and I see the videographers filming me. And I smile at them as they mutter something to me. "What?" I ask them, as I approach them.

I didn't really feel like talking to them or anyone right now. I just wanted to be alone. "Where'd you go?" he repeats.

The truth was, I didn't know where I was. Physically yes. I was in Jamaica. But mentally, I wasn't sure. Do I call back Nikki or do I just wait it out.

I just shrug my shoulders, "It's hard to tell" I say and all I wanted to do was go back into the water where it was calm and I could let all my stress go.

I hop over the edge again and I hear the guy yelling and laughing at me, thinking I'm being funny. And sure, I probably played it off that way, but I seriously didn't know what to do anymore.

I sink back into the water but come up to the surface quickly. I slowly swim, with no where in mind. The water made me feel peaceful and that's how I wanted things to be for now.