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Zinar screamed as she closed her mouth with her pillow. Her first paper was in less than a week and she felt drained. She looked over her bed at the pile of books that were scattered. She inhaled in and out before opening the page she was reading. She read it again and again but it was like the words escaped her brain the moment it left her lips. She hit her head with the book in her hands holding back the tears. She felt frustrated and tired. She flung the book and roughly rested her head on the pillow. A few minutes later she stood up, she needed a distraction. She went to Stephanie's room and they were both out, she came back to her room and decided to bake but remembered she didn't have flour nor sugar. She groaned in annoyance. She searched for her phone and dialled her mother's number but no answer. She held on to herself feeling her anxiety coursing through, just then her mother called back. She immediately disconnected the phone and called her back.

"Maaaa" she almost cried

"Na'am Zinaru am" "Noi?"

"Jam, how is work"

"Work is fine, how are your studies"

"Draining" she chuckled nervously

"You said your first paper is next week koh?"


"Are you prepared, have you gone through everything?" she asked making Zinar feel more agitated.

"Hmm," she sniggered. She hated the way they made it look as though it was easy. She was there having a meltdown, forgetting what she knew . The whole thing made her boil.

"Zinaru" her mother called


"Have patience, cry when you need to, take a break when you have to, pray in every situation, do your best and leave the rest" her mother's words cracked her but she pushed the whole feeling away.

"Mama thank you". She asked about everyone at home who were all either at work or Nabil that was at school. She told her she was the only one at home and was about to eat lunch. She told her mother about Ahmad and that things were good when she asked.

"We should start talking about the dresses you will wear but that should be after your first paper". She hanged up the phone after they spoke for over twenty minutes. She wasn't sure she still wanted the biki but she knew it was a close discussion.

Zainab called afterwards she informed her that her wedding date with Ahmad Sadiq had been fixed for September 20th and then it was June 4th. Zinar was more than thrilled.

"So how far with your own biki date?" Zainab asked

"Abegi" she hissed

"Trouble in paradise?" she hoped things were good for her. She was out there alone and things kinda happened fast for her.

"Ke everything is fine oo Allahamdulilah. I just don't want to go through the stress of biki"

"eh ehn! So you can't wait to finish and get a room" she giggled.

"May God deliver you" she laughed, they gist some more before disconnecting the phone. She felt better after all the phone calls but she still wasn't ready to get back to her books. She called Ahmad since her mood was more pleasant and he wasted no time answering. He told he was about to call her that he wanted to take her out. She thought it was perfect since she needed a distraction.

"You look beautiful" he was seated next to her on the ground on a hilltop, his eyes fixed on her.

"This is literally my casual wear" she tried to mask her blush.

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