at the edge of the cliff || ✔

chapter sixty-four: the other side of the I love you

at the edge of the cliff

chapter sixty-four: the other side of the I love you

-Grayson's Point Of View-

I knew she was going to be here. That little shit is too predictable. Shay looked shocked but also terrified as she stares at me from the couch. "Shay can you give us a minute." My father says. Wordlessly she got up and left the room. It fell silent as we heard the front door shut. "Sit." Something told me not to argue; just listen. So I sat down. I didn't know what to think, looking at my dad who had a few tears on his face and red eyes, and my mom who looked as if she had been crying for a good hour or two. She had always been so emotional. but when Will died, only a few months after, she just stopped. Like he took all of her tears with him when he got put six feet into the ground. I have rarely seen her cry since. 

Despite the sadness that hung above the room, I still expected to be yelled at. But he looked me dead in the eye and said, "I'm sorry." I felt the air go out of my lungs. Did he just say he is sorry? I stare at him shocked and confused, looking at my mother every once and while. "I-" he blows out a breath, his eyes getting glossy. He blinks a couple extra times. "We all miss him." I clench my fist but keep my mouth shut. "We really do." His voice goes thicker as he chokes up. My mom scoots closer to him and wraps her arm around his. He sighs. "Your brother took a piece of all of us, and I guess I just don't know how to handle it." I bite the inside of my cheek, desperate to keep a straight face, forcing the tears back down. 

"After he died, we were extra hard on you." My mother began. By we she meant him and we all knew that. "We wanted the best for you because we just couldn't lose you too." Her lips turn downward as a few tears escape. She stands up and comes to the couch I was on. She puts her hand on my cheek and then she goes blurry. "You're all we have left Grayson." she stroked my chin before letting her hand drop. 

"We can't go on like this anymore, son." my dad says bringing my attention to him. For the first time in I don't know how long, I looked my father in the eyes. I'm pretty sure his glossy eyes matched mine as we looked at each other for a moment. 

"I know." I finally say. He nods blowing out a breath. I watch as he stands up. motioning for me to do the same. 

"I love you son. You know that right." He says, the words coming out strained as he was trying to hold himself together. I nod. The first tear falls as my father pulls me into the first hug we've shared in three years. I blew out a shaky breath as more and more tears escaped from my eyes. 

"I love you, dad." I say when I think I can finally talk without bursting out crying like a baby. He pats my back one last time before pulling away.

"I love you too." he nods. My mom comes to stand in between the both of us, pulling the both of us to each of her side. 

"And I love the both of you." She says. After our little family moment, my father slaps me on the back, turning my attention towards him. He gives me a look. 

"Seems like you got quite a girl huh?" He says, a playful tone in his voice. He's obviously talking about Shay.  And he is obviously right. To be honest, I got a little pissed at her at first for butting in, but look where it got us. Plus its only because she cares so much about me. And that feels damn good. I look torwards the door remembering that she was still outside. "Go on." He laughs, ushering me outside. I open the door and step outside, shutting it behind me. I stifle a laugh as Shay jumps up, her clumsy ass stumbling forward. I watch as she stares at me, a million and one thoughts going through her head. I could see it in her eyes. Her amazingly green eyes. As she stands there dazed off, I let my eyes roam over her. Her hair fell over her shoulders in her natural, perfect curls down to past her tiny waist. Her hips that are a little wider give her that hourglass figure, even though you couldn't really tell through her leggings and hoodie that came almost down to her knees. But she looked amazing. She was amazing. Probably, no one hundred percent the strongest person I know, and probably will ever know. She blinked and it was like she came back to reality.

She opened her mouth, but knowing her she would say something to completely ruin the moment, so I did the only thing I knew, and wanted to do in that moment. I pulled her into a hug.

I loved holding her.

Its like our bodies fit like perfect puzzle pieces.

She wrapped her arm around me, holding me just as tight. And as I sat there holding the girl I love-

Wait.

What?

Did I just- I love her?

I love her.

She pulled away, bringing her hands up to my face, cupping it gently, searching my eyes. She looked like she was about to say something, but I stopped her once again.

"I love you." I blurt. By the look on her face, it probably wasn't the best idea. Her eyes were wide as she looked up at me, speechless. Shit. What did I just do? Its not like I can take it back now. "Please say something." I beg putting my hands over hers, pushing them away. She gapes at me.

And then did something that literally made my heart hurt.

She ran.

She literally turned around and ran back to her car. I watch from the porch ad she scurries to climb in, starting it, and driving off. Leaving me behind looking like an idiot. My chest feels heavy as her car dissappears out of sight.

She left.

I told her I loved her, and she left.

Wow, if that's not a punch to the face, I dont know what is.

Does she not love me?

Is it too soon? 

Did I freak her out?

I walk inside, making up some excuse to go in my room for the rest of the day. The ceiling is what I stared at for the next couple hours. Thinking. A million thoughts keeping me busy through the night.