Hetalia Oneshots & Lemons *Requests Open*

Germany x Depressed!Male!Reader-Ich Liebe Dich *Lemon*

(A/n): Requested by CosplayNightmare , hope you like it.

Germany-Ludwig Beilschmidt
Italy-Feliciano Vargas
Japan-Honda Kiku
Prussia-Gilbert Beilschmidt
Romano-Loving Vargas

(M/n)-Male name
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(M/n)'s P.O.V.
Ludwig is making Kiku, Feli and I run laps again. Despite the fact I asked him for a few days off He is still making me train. Lately my depression has been getting worse so I wanted to take a few days off but Ludwig just told me training is vital and I need it.

I've been struggling with depression since I was a teenager. My father left my mother when I was really young. I caught him leaving that night and he told me he never wanted me and I was a mistake. From then my life has gone down hill.

During school I was bullied, I accidentally revealed I was gay during an argument with someone and the bullying started. I was beat up after school during school and had to deal with comments targeted towards me.

Around this time I was diagnosed with depression, I missed weeks of school, I pretended I was ok to my mother but I couldn't hide the fact I didn't want to go to school. She booked me in to see a therapist but I only went once. I felt like my privacy was being invaded.

During school a new student transferred. We met one time I was hiding and he told me he'd beat them up for me. We eventually fell in love and dated for two years. Right before we graduated he was in a car accident and died shortly after. I nearly took my own life, I was sitting on the edge of a bridge when I felt a pull.

It might have been him holding me back, or my own soul telling me not to jump but I climbed down from the bridge and walked home. On the walk home I sat in the park, watching all the people. That's where I met Feliciano.

He hid behind the bench I was sitting at, telling me to 'Not tell doitsu'. After a few minutes a bug, buff man walked up to me with blond hair and blue eyes. He told me he was looking for a small Italian boy and I lied and said I didn't know.

He stayed talking with me, I found it so easy to talk to him. Feliciano finally gave up and jumped out from behind the seat. We exchanged numbers and I felt happy I had made new friends. A few days after I graduated my mother developed an illness and she died a few days later.

I lost my house and Ludwig said I could live with him. My depression didn't get much better from there but it didn't get worse. Only Feliciano knows I have depression because he was hiding in my closet to scare me when I took my anti-depressants.

I fell in love with Ludwig but I can't tell him, I don't think I would be able to handle loosing another person, If I confess and he says he doesn't feel the same I don't know what I would do, probably something stupid or crazy.

Now back to where I am now. I feel tired, mentally drained and ready to cry. I just want to go to bed and either cuddle with someone or sleep. Feliciano runs up to me and whispers.

"Are you ok?" He asks

"I don't think so, I just want to go to bed." I sigh

"Tell Doitsu, he really likes you so he'll let you." Feliciano says

"Yeah right, I'll just hold on for a few more hours." I reply and pick up the pace

I notice Feliciano fall behind me and whisper something to Ludwig but I don't think he would tell Ludwig what I'm going through. I think Feliciano and Ludwig are coming to come out as dating soon, I can't imagine why Ludwig would choose me over someone as cute, fun or good at cooking as Feliciano. Not to mention they've known each other for years,