YOᑌ ᗩGᗩIᑎ

Chapter 11.

I nodded my head because she was absolutely right. I wasn't going to leave Austin but what if I had left him? What if I ask him for a divorce and he gives it to me but Lauren leaves again. Should I trust her with my heart again? But what about those looks she gave me? What about those feelings she gave me when she worshipped my body last night? If that wasn't love then what was? Why everything had to be so fucking complicated?

“But mom, I love her. I never stopped loving her. I just pushed those feelings back because I thought she was gone but now she is back, all my feelings that I bottled deep inside are now rushing back to the surface altogether.” I said and my mother quickly wiped my tears from my face.

“We never really do move on, we just learn to withstand the pain long enough till it stops hurting.”

I looked into the eyes of the woman who understood me. My mind was going crazy and somehow the words she said, soothed me in way that I couldn't explain. Maybe Lauren was once again just a reason. Maybe she is back in my life to give me a lesson. My mom grabbed my hands once again and gave them a tight squeeze.

“Remember when you once asked me how will you find the right person in your life?” my mother asked.

I nodded my head, recalling the memory of me being sixteen years old and having no love life. A small smile appeared on my face as my mother continued, “Do you remember the answer I gave you, Camila?”

I once again nodded my head and repeated her words from twelve years ago, “Forget finding the right person, focus one being the right one.”

With that being said, my mother grinned and embraced me in another hug. I had no idea why she was reminding me all that now since I had Austin, who was indeed the right one for me. “Why did you remind me that now, mamà?”

“I reminded you that because you need this. You are confused between the love of your life and the man you are married to. Just focus on being the right person and the one who you truly deserve will come to you. If you deserve Lauren, she will be with you in the end but if not, Austin will make you the happiest person in the whole world and Lauren wouldn't be able to change that. You just have to be the right one for the both of them and your daughter.”

Another tear skipped my eyes and my mother chuckled, “Stop crying like a baby, it's not the end of the world.”

“You said that Lauren left once, she will leave me again. She promised she wouldn't.” I said as I looked in my mother's brown eyes. A small sympathetic smile appeared on my mother's face as she took a deep breath.

“Camila, remember that the fastest to leave is the one who promises to stay.”

My heart took another dive. Why was my mom being right about everything? Why her words were so damn powerful? Whatever she said shook my entire soul and I was torn between reality and fantasy. I was torn between Austin and Lauren. Before I could speak, my mother began once again.

“You are my daughter and I care about you more than anything in this world. Yours, Sunny's and Sofi's happiness is all that I ever want in life. I know you trust Lauren, and you should. That girl is amazing even if she left you but you shouldn't trust her with your heart. She herself said that she can't be with you, what more confirmation do you need?”

Before I could stop, the words left my mouth, “We made love,”

My mother's mouth fell on the floor and her eyes widened in surprise. I didn't want to tell that to my mother but well I guess it was necessary. Wasn't it the enough confirmation of our love? Wasn't it the enough confirmation that the both of us needed? Very awkwardly, my mother chuckled and looked away. I groaned in frustration as I got up from the couch and paced back and forth in the room.